...but the second mouse gets the cheese.

...but the leg of a chair up your arse is furniture.

it has to, no one's listening

I find a random combination of "horses for courses", "nature of the beast" and "swings and roundabouts" provides a catch-all answer to almost any situation.

... and experience comes from bad judgement.

To do, to be (Rousseau)
To be, to do (Sartre)
Do, be, do, be, do (Sinatra)

If my auntie had baws she'd be my uncle

Eagles may soar, but Weasels never get sucked into jet engines...

"Different frogs, different times." - Gareth Keenan.

... but my phrase "Nothing can possibly go wrong" seems to get used quite a lot amongst my peers.

Do not criticise a man until you have walked a mile in his shoes.
Because then you'll be a mile away. And you'll have his shoes.

than a frontal lobotomy