Blimey, Shane - that's both hideous and within the realms of plausibility...

Phew - I think we all had a number of lucky escapes there!

During the Beatles' first EMI recording session George Martin, in an attempt to put the provincial lads at ease, says "Let me know if there's anything you don't like"

Quick as a flash George Harrison comes back with "Well, for a start, I don't like your tie!"

The notoriously short-tempered producer takes umbrage at this and punches the guitarist in the face, saying "You cheeky twat! Collect your gear and piss off. Never darken the doors of Abbey Road again!"

Disconsolate, the band returns to Liverpool, their embryonic recording career in ruins.

They split up the following week.

Miles Davis and Gil Evans were both keen to (separately) collaborate with Mr. Hendrix. There are ropey bootlegs of Hendrix jamming with various people. The only one I've heard that was interesting was a session with keyboardist Larry Young.

The Fabs supposedly wanted to make a LOTR film in the late 60's , with Macca as Frodo, Lennon as Gollum, Ringo as Sam, and George as Gandalf (?) . Luckily JRR Tolkien who still owned the film rights nixed this ever happening

REM, after talking it over with each other, decide to continue churning out "disappointing" and "something of a return to form" albums forever.

Faced by flagging record sales, The Beatles embark on an ill-advised disco album.

.....sales of 'Dogs' and 'Magic Bus' disappointing, so Pete Townshend decides what the world needs is a concept album, then a concept album, then a concept album, then a concept album, then the record company release a 4-CD Box Set of one of those concept albums, then a 6-CD Box Set of another one of those concept albums, then....oh.....wait a minute!

Smile , now fronted by Cliff Richard, give a free concert during rain breaks at the Wimbledon Championships. Immediately following this, the Wimbledon committee draw up plans for a covered roof!

Bob Marley decides that actually, he doesn't want to die from cancer, gets his toe amputated and renounces the "silly" rastafarianism. When finally without drugs in his system, denounces music and gets a real job selling house insurance.

Maybe I'm out of step here, but that sounds like a fantastic line-up to me.

Morrissey eats a bacon sandwich, quits the music business and buys a a small holding with a cottage by a river. His friend, a Channel 4 commissioning editor, suggests filming his first year there complete with lamb slaughtering and entrail eating.

Hugh Fearnley-Whittingstall, devoid of a tv career, gravitated to politics and became Prime Minister saving the UK from David Cameron.

Mark King disbands Level 42 and enlists Stanley Clarke, Bernard Edwards, Jaco Pastorius and Pino Palladino for his bass guitar supergroup Bottoms Up.

The Undertones begin recording their debut album with Mutt Lange. Teenage Kicks alone takes 6 months to record as the sixty-seven guitar parts are laid down, each chord built up by recording individual notes separately. Upon its release, disc jockey John Peel describes it as "A piece of shit."

Kate Bush is so taken by working with beardy Renaissance man Rolf Harris on The Dreaming that she retires from music and potters about at home drawing cartoons and making daft, incomprehensible noises. In the mid-1990s she reappears amid a blaze of publicity with her hand up a koala bear's arse on hit TV series Animal Hospital.

Keith Richards and Brian Jones decide that singer Mick Jagger is far more interested in copping off with any passing female than with taking the music seriously and boot him out and recruit Chris Farlowe to take over lead vocals.

...only to find that their career very quickly runs out of time...

Jon Anderson and Ian Anderson, both smarting from the drubbings unleashed on both "Tales From Topographic Oceans" and "Passion Play" join forces on a project, which, according to the duo, "will definitely be more succinct".
The resulting quadruple album concept piece "Atoms Within A Drayhorse" is panned mercilessly by the U.K. press, but goes to No.1 in Estonia.

Paul Simon packs his guitar and hairpiece and heads to Bolivia in search of fresh musical inspiration. On his travels he meets an old man playing the panpipes on top of a lonely mountain peak and stays with him for 6 months in order to be initiated in the ways of blowing through a tube. He is introduced to numerous practitioners of the art of piping who feature on his mega smash album Pipeland. The album causes great controversy in the US and UK as it breaks the international boycott of panpipe music.

Let's face it. It would have been CRAP.

And Stanley Kubrick wouldn't have made his.

Johnny Cash fumes as his planned recording session with Rick Rubin is aborted. The producer is indisposed as he is entering the world beard championships, which are obviously far more important than working with some has-been. Then, in a flash of inspiration, the A Boy Named Sue hitmaker remembers the names of some English guys that his daughter mentioned once. Three weeks later he is safely ensconced in the studios of Messrs Stock, Aitken and Waterman, who assure him that they can restore him to his rightful place at the top of the charts. Sadly the single Boys, Boys, Boys fails to set the world alight.

Roger Waters wants Doris Troy to "vocalise". Unfortunately she has a throat infection and has to improvise on the swanee whistle. "The Great Gig In The Sky" doesn't make the, er, final cut.

John Lennon wins the argument to have "Whats The New Mary Jane" on the White Album.

"Mother Nature's Son" is mothballed to make room for it, only appearing later on the Japanese cassingle of "Real Love".

With Ronnie Wood's alcohol and drug problems spiraling out of control, Mick Jagger puts his foot down and insists that he leaves The Rolling Stones. The singer - ever keen to keep his finger on the pulse of who's hot and who's not - overrules Keith Richards' choice of Peter Green as his replacement and opts instead for up-and-coming axe shredder Yngwie Malmsteen. During an ill-tempered show in New Haven, Connecticut in 1985, a furious Keef clobbers the new boy around the head with his Telecaster after he starts playing lightning-fast Bach arpeggios during Beast of Burden. Malmsteen dies later that evening in hospital and Richards is arrested on a murder charge, but in the court case the following year the jury finds him not guilty on grounds of "reasonable provocation". The band split shortly thereafter.

Don and Wendy Cobain of Aberdeen WA in the United States are having a rough time in their marriage but decide not to split - rather to seek out a new life, closer to their Hibernian roots in the village of Pomeroy, Co Tyrone. A short period there convinces the Cobains that rural life in Ulster is a pale shadow of the "true Irish experience" - the Troubles don't help - so they move on again, in 1977, to a remote corner of Co Cork.
Don does reasonably well as a mechanic and Wendy's American attitude to waitressing goes down splendidly at a local upmarket hotel.
Young Kurt is the cool kid at a quiet school, he excels, and eventually goes off to Trinity College, Dublin, in 1985 to study Ancient & Medieval History and Culture. Although he displays some aptitude for music during his university years, playing in a couple of bands, he graduates in 1989 with a decent degree and goes into banking where he makes a large pile of cash.
After the banking crash of 2008, he took time off for a couple of years, living in a big ranch house he had built near his parents in Co Cork. With his 45th birthday looming early next year, he's now getting quite antsy and looking at new business opportunities in the Far East.

Jesse Garon Presley was born on January 8, 1935, in Tupelo, Mississippi, to 18-year-old Vernon Elvis and 22-year-old Gladys Love Presley. In the two-room shotgun house built by his father in readiness for the birth, Elvis Presley, his identical twin brother, was delivered 35 minutes after him, stillborn. As an only child, Jesse became close to both parents and formed an unusually tight bond with his mother. He grew up to be a maintenance engineer, largely working on farm equipment.

Night in 1935, Robert Johnson, a struggling musician, went down to the crossroads at Dockery Plantation, to meet a mysterious stranger. Hit by a bus, the driver of which failed to see him in the dark, he lingered in a coma for a week before dying, his potential, if he had any, unfulfilled.

The Smiths are wrapping up the recording sessions for their new album. Left alone in the studio late one evening, Johnny Marr listens to the title song Meat is Murder whilst polishing off copious amounts of Jim Beam. He's happy with what they've done, but something is missing. That one extra element that will make it a masterpiece. Then it hits him. What he needs to do is to call Lionel Stander - gravel-voiced Max in Hart to Hart - who says the word "murder" better than anybody. After a long, tense phone call during which a heavily-sozzled Marr begs the actor to fly over to the UK immediately, the reluctant thesp finally agrees. He records his vocal in the utmost secrecy as Marr explains to him that Morrissey doesn't like Hart to Hart and prefers CHiPs. The two men sit in the control room and weep tears of joy as they listen to the playback.

Three weeks later Morrissey takes delivery of his copy of the new LP and opens a bottle of pale ale in celebration. He is rather enjoying himself, tapping his foot contentedly and stroking his gladioli as the songs play on his trusty Dansette. Draining his glass, he's all set for the big one - his cris de coeur. The song starts and all is well in Morrissey world until, in a flash, his mood darkens. A slow, anguished howl rises from his throat and erupts into screams of rage. One by one his prized porcelain dogs shatter against the living room wall. And then... only the sound of music. "A death for no reason / And death for no reason is MOIDER"

"No acid for me, thanks", says Peter Green

March 1990: the former Fleetwood Mac guitarist arrives in a Ferrari to play the first date of his annual 24 night run at the Royal Albert Hall. The same week he features in Forbes Rich List with a fortune estimated at one billion dollars.

Actually, this is what SHOULD have happened.

..at Victoria Station in 1976 is the catalyst for the beginnings of an organisation called "Rock For Fascism," which a young Nick Griffin joins in 1977. He quickly rises through the ranks.
The group, which shortens its name to RFF, rapidly gains a foothold with disaffected youth in Britain, especially with Bowie as its figurehead.
RFF's defeat of Thatcher after her first term in government changes the political face of Europe.. forever.
Nick Griffin (or "The Father" as he prefers to be called) still cites "Quicksand" as his favourite Bowie song.

.....(seriously) but it is the Gnome-referenced tune which is The Dame's first hit and not 'Space Oddity'.

Not only that, but it out-sells its label mate 'A Whiter Shade Of Pale, ten to one, and is number one for six weeks.

Fast forward to TOTP, June 1972.....
Hmmm, isn't this the guy who did that 'I was walking down the high street.....'

Ahhhhhhh!
Osmonds, Osmonds, please give me The Osmonds.

Elton John was run over on the way to Princess Diana's funeral service and was hospitalised.

On hearing the news, Earl Spencer recalled that Diana absolutely adored the Wet Wet Wet single that was no 1 a while back. Everyone, even Charles, agrees that Marti Pellow was a big favourite of hers and they should get in touch with him to sing "Candle in the Wind" instead.

Marty Pellow couldn't make it in time, so the Earl got in touch with the more locally-based Billy Bragg to sing "Candle in the Wind". This was the Earl's idea, because he had found the Wet Wet Wet single on Diana's turntable when he was sorting through her things. Billy's name was on the B-side and he assumed that he was similar act to Marty Pellow.

Earl Spencer had no idea who Billy was and brushed aside concerns. In fact, he lost his rag. He was sick and tired of being told what to do, and he had made far too many compromises already.

Billy agreed to do it. When he solemnly took to the altar, he sang the first two verses perfectly. When he got to the chorus, things changed. It became a very articulate, respectful and emotional attack on the Royal Family and everything it stands for. It's done so well, with such clarity, such sincerity and fairness that the entire congregation, apart from the first few rows, stood up and applauded. The large crowds outside spontaneously did the same.

Later, when the funeral procession paused outside Buckingham Palace, there was a crowd of 200,000 in the Mall - the hearse - and then the Royal Family in a line in front of the gates. Emotionally whipped up by Billy's song and the Earl's speech, the crowd surged forward and calmly walked into the Palace.

In this very British revolution, no shots were fired. Tony Blair is quickly supportive because he was worried that it could easily spread to No 10 and the Houses of Parliament.

Later on, Billy appeared on the balcony and he sings the song again. Prince William and his father are filmed in the crowd applauding loudly, with tears of joy. They, together with Harry, embrace tightly. The Queen, with a Face Like Thunder had made a hasty exit some time earlier.

Over the next few years, Billy Bragg's ministerial job was to disaggregate all Royal assets and ensure that wealth is distributed fairly to the nation. Charles is "frankly, jolly relieved!" and becomes a relaxed and popular public figure. No way is he going to be King - but he makes it very clear he doesn't want to be, as does William.

Billy's influence is now such that his opinion is pretty much adopted at face value by politicians of the day. Britain distances itself from the Bush administration.

Following a personal tragedy, Robert Plant decides that he can no longer play the part of the golden god and signs up to a teacher training course in Kidderminster. After a long business meeting which mainly involves Jimmy Page sitting in a pentagram chanting whilst gurgling the blood of a decapitated chicken, the other band members opt to try to find a replacement singer. Consulting his astrological tomes, Page notes that Mercury is prominent in his chart... and then it hits him. Freddie Mercury. Not as sexy as Plant but a fine singer and charismatic frontman. Several telephone calls are made until finally Mercury agrees to a rehearsal in the basement of John Bonham's local. There is magic in the air and musical sparks fly. But unknown to all but Freddie, romance is in the air as well. As he watches the drummer's powerful arms flail in an ecstasy of rhythm, he feels that stirring in his loins that he knows all too well. But unusually for him he decides to go for a low-key approach in order to get his man. The rehearsal over, Mercury has the job. He is the new vocalist in Led Zeppelin.

He is introduced to the fans on a mammoth summer US tour. 30 stadium shows over 2 months, all sold out. After a tentative start by his standards, Mercury begins to gain in confidence. And this is when the problems start. At the climax of a concert in LA he begins Stairway to Heaven with the line "There's a fat bottomed lady that's sure all that glitters is gold", much to Page's chagrin. A tête-à-tête between Freddie and manager Peter Grant rapidly sorts things out and the next night's show passes off without incident. But at Giants Stadium the following day things again take a turn for the worse. As the band kicks into Rock and Roll, Mercury runs onstage in a pink leather jockstrap, pointing his bottom at the crowd and chanting "We will rock you". Afterwards, only the combined might of Zeppelin's road crew prevents Grant from "tearing him a new arsehole" as the manager delicately puts it. Mercury's reply of "Ooh, is that a threat or a promise?" fails to calm the situation.

The tour nearly over, Freddie is a discontented chap. Despite using all the tricks at his disposal - a sly wink here, a patted bottom there - he is no nearer to where he really wants to be - safe within John Bonham's loving embrace. During the end of tour party he gazes longingly at the drummer, who is downing White Russians with unusual fervour. In the early hours Bonham is carried unconscious up to bed by his minders and Freddie spots his opportunity. Waiting a few minutes, he gingerly opens the door to Bonham's room and slides himself into bed next to the drummer. Now he has him where he wants him.

The following morning the entire hotel is awoken by a volcanic eruption from one of the penthouse suites. Staff on the reception desk are bemused by the sight of a naked Mercury being chased through the foyer by Bonham wielding a firefighter axe. John Paul Jones - ever the diplomat - steps in and asks what the matter is. "I'll tell you what the fuckin' matter is! I woke up and *he* was in bed with me, blowing me kisses and licking my ear!" "Oh darling, you do make a fuss!" Freddie retorts, before the bassist can say another word.

This proves the final straw for Led Zeppelin. Unacquainted with the phrase "never mix business with pleasure", Mercury quits and the band disintegrates soon after.

all of Kraftwerk's albums would have sounded like bloody "Tone Float".

Atom Kraft?

Ja bitte!

Following the announcement of the Chernobyl disaster on Newsbeat, an audibly shaken Steve Wright announces two minutes silence for the victims. There follows a sober discussion of the implications with the UK's top nuclear scientists, and before Bruno Brookes takes over there are only time for 3 records - by the New York Dolls, Sandie shaw and the Primitives.

Sire records tell the Ramones that 29 minutes is too short for an album. The despondent band, having no spare material, rerecord everything at a slower tempo.

Punk rock doesn't happen and we get another 30 years of ELP.

David gets introduced to crooning music early on by Terry Burns, his half-brother. David isn't overly fussed.

1962, and he gets into a scrap with George Underwood. Underwood, having been mocked for wearing rings the previous week, his fingers are ungirdled at the time of fighting. Jones sustains a black eye but otherwise ok.

Becoming enthused by rock and roll, Jones contacts John Bloom, a successful washing-machine entrepreneur, who immediately takes Jones under his wing, putting him in commercials, and leading to the success of Davy Jones and The King Bees. Their signature tune "Liza Jane" is a minor hit, with follow-up "I Pity The Fool" peaking at a respectable #15, joined a couple of months later by "You've Got A Habit Of Leaving". Under Bloom's management, the King Bees record an album of mainly covers, which fairs moderately. Jones and Bloom later fell out during recording for the second King Bees album, leaving Jones disillusioned with the record industry, returning to his parents house in Bromley, getting a job selling washing machines at the local electrical store. Graduating to become a manager by the age of 32, Jones spent the next 8 years running the store, sadly dying of a heart attack just weeks from his 40th birthday. The King Bees reform for a tribute show to mark his death, before fading into the ether. The world continues to turn.

circa 1950 has a good old morning cough, clearing his throat completely.

Bang goes the Golden Golly of Blues Soul.

Blur and Oasis, fresh from their "Country House"/"Roll With It" battle, decide to cash in and make a one off single together,
The result "Afternoon Tea With Mr Horace Gobshite" turns out to be an appalling mix, sounding (to the ears of one Andrew Harrison writing in Select) .."like the illegitimate child of ELO and the 80s Kinks throwing studio equipment at each other"

Tony Wilson goes to see the Sex Pistols at the Freetrade Hall in Manchester. Unmoved he decides it is unlistenable sh*te and decides to make a difference to the music industry.
He ignores the 4 scruffy guys from Macclesfield/Salford & instead concentrates him time & money on a young gentleman in the audience named Mick Hucknall. Together they take over the musical world & go on to influence a whole wave of new bands going under the banner of 'Mickchester' in the late eighties

Edit - I know Mick Hucknall was not actually at the first free trade gig, that minor detail got in the way a little :)

1978...The Sex Pistols do not break up in Texas, they sack Malcolm McClaren and within two years become "The 80s Faces"
The NME drops them like a hot potato after their 1981 semi acoustic LP featuring a limp cover of Bill Wither's "Lean On Me"

says to young Bruce, you can forget that rock 'n roll Independence Day crap, stay away from that van Zandt hoodlum, get a real job and make some real money down the factory.

OK dad, get off my case. I'll go down to the factory and see about a job. Maybe you're right. Just don't go on at me all the time.

Once every couple of years when Sugar Miami Steve and the E Street Sopranos hit town on their latest movie theatre sized tour Bruce can get himself backstage and over a bottle of beer talk about the old days.

Steve says, You know Bruce, I always thought you had something. A bit wordy maybe, but you definitely had something. You and me, perhaps we could have made something of it. Something bigger than this. You known, play the stadiums. Play Europe. Play Japan. Roy agrees with me, don't you Professor.

OK well great to see you and the guys. Got to get back to the wife and kids. I still play a bit of guitar. Me and this guy Clarence - remember him? big black sax player. We mess around. Talk about getting it together. Maybe one time when you're back around we can play you some stuff. See what you think. Yea. great to see you. Oh yea, love the new CD. You couldn't sign it for me, couldya?

and spends a lovely night at the movies. Unfortunately this means that her babysitter is unable to make it to the Gram Parsons gig. And she was going to go backstage afterward, too.

are wasted on here, genuine laugh out loud moments, I'm not even going to try. Patrick you must make a book out of yours, please keep them coming.

I'm not who you had in mind but in common with others (I suspect) I am quite often wasted when I come on here.

John McKay has a big sleep-in in 1979 and decides - you know, its a nice morning, the sun is shining - hmmm (stretches) - and the Banshees is a belting old gig after all. John McGeoch's services are not required.

Upon being rudely ejected from space rock warlords Hawkwind, Lemmy Kilmister finds himself at a loose end. Music has been his life and there are only so many one-armed bandits one can play before boredom sets in. He decides to cash in all his chips at once and buy a one way ticket to New York City in search of a fresh start.

His arrival at JFK airport causes something of a stir, as Americans aren't as tolerant of facial warts as the British. But a few turned-up noses and snide comments doesn't overly concern Lemmy as he has succeeded in importing a kilo of amphetamine sulphate in the one pair of socks he has brought with him. He hails a taxi and heads straight for the heart of the action in Greenwich Village. After a brief altercation with the driver, who complains at being paid in illegal substances, the bass warrior enters Cafe Wha?, a joint recommended to him by his old mate Jimi Hendrix. Using all the charm at his disposal - which is considerable, considering the warts - he convinces an attractive blonde named Cindy to ply him with Jack Daniel and Coke for the rest of the evening. Near closing time, a young black man carrying a guitar case comes over to the bar and says hello to Cindy. "Oh hi Nile! Listen... this is my new special friend Lemmy. He's a bass player from England. Lemmy... this is my special friend Nile. Nile Rodgers." "Do you want some amphetamine?" says Lemmy by way of reply. Nile grins and says "Why sure!" It is the start of a beautiful friendship...

Before too long Nile and Lemmy are inseparable. Each night they return to the guitarist's apartment after the bars shut and play music into the small hours. Nile is very taken with Lemmy's prowess on the bass and his unconventional technique, which seems to involve strumming the strings as hard as possible with every switch on the amplifier set at maximum. He isn't exactly funky, but he has got talent. And Nile Rodgers knows talent when he hears it.

Come 1977 and a band is taking shape. Nile's friend Tony Thompson settles in on drums and provides a rock solid beat. The addition of Alfa and Luci on vocals adds the final touch and Lemmy wastes no time in seducing them with his warty English charm. They start to play a few shows around New York City and before too long have signed a deal with Atlantic records. The ignominious end to his career in Hawkwind seems a long, long time ago.

After highly-productive recording sessions at the Record Plant their first single is ready for release. Le Speedfreak takes the Billboard Hot 100 by storm and reaches No.1 where it remains for 10 weeks. Back in the UK, Dave Brock can only utter the word "Fuck".

Massive Attack, wary of the sensitivities of services families, temporarily abbreviate their name to Attack.

In big capitals.

Lloyd Cole falls in love with a girl with shocking acne.

Nelson Mandela is released, therefore depriving us all of a fantastic Special AKA song.

[If you've think I've gone too far, you should see what I nearly posted about Chernobyl]

England, having qualified for the World Cup, are the shock winners. Graham Taylor is knighted, but on the other hand "Three Lions" never gets written.

[I think this may be on the wrong thread]

The Stone Roses and Happy Mondays are sent by producer Michael Hurll to wardrobe and told, "You're not getting on unless you're wearing clothes that fit properly".

leads to the sleeves of The Return of The Durutti Column being manufactured inside-out.

Freah from rehab, after a near-fatal incident, Jimi Hendrix's friendship with Eric Burdon (who had saved him) and Chas Chandler deepens significantly. To such a degree a jam session of Geordie folk songs results in an album, 'Starship To Billy Mill'

Tracks included 'Blaydon Races On Venus', 'Cushy Butterfield Forever' and 'The Lambton Worm (1987 A Worm I should be)'

Later, Hendrix joins Lindisfarne and appeared each Christmas on stage at Newcastle City Hall with a Malcolm Macdonald tshirt on.

Somebody takes his name rather too seriously and the shades-wearing mofo is made State Secretary of Elementary Education.

Fed up of all the attention given to Peter Gabriel on the Lamb Lies Down on Broadway Tour, the drummer storms out and is replaced by Bill Bruford who becomes the band's permanent drummer. Gabriel lingers for a further couple of albums, but all the members agree to go their own special ways in 1977....

Phil Collins leaves to form his own doo-wop quartet and is never heard of again.

Hang on....

A young folk singer named Bob Dylan auditions for John Hammond at Columbia Records. Hammond is impressed by Dylan's raw passion, but decides to pass, probably due to the singer's all too apparent debt to Woody Guthrie.
Dylan instead turns to Maynard Solomon at Vanguard Records, who does not see the Guthrie resemblance as a problem at all.
His self titled debut L.P. consisting mainly of blues and folk standards is a big seller for the independent label and firmly establishes Dylan as a new voice.
Dylan himself is a restless soul who starts recasting traditional songs with new, highly original lyrics. "Nottamun Town" becomes the searing "Masters Of War" and "Lord Franklin" becomes "Bob Dylan's Dream"
Maynard Solomon hears these songs and rejects them as... "Too personal and obscure". Dylan is dejected and returns to performing the songs in their original form. His songwriting never appears again.
His second album "Bushes And Briars" features the same mixture of blues and folk, with a heavy leaning toward British traditional songs.
His career is a long one, and he remains second only to Dave Van Ronk as a peerless interpreter, known as much for his witty stage patter as his singing. He always makes time after a show to meet his fans.
John Hammond puts his weight behind Phil Ochs who rapidly becomes the voice of his generation.
"Folk music," says Ochs "Is a bunch of fat people"
"Like Dylan?" asked Robert Shelton.
"You said that, not me"

a small band called the Beatles landed in Sweden for a short tour.
Sick of each other after the Hamburg years the frustrations that had been building soon exploded in vicious arguments and a fistfight where the lads ended up throwing pickled herring at each other.
That was the end of the band, Ringo, Paul and John went back to Liverpool and invested their small earnings into small businesses.
A depressed George stayed in Stockholm, mourning the death of his music career.
One night he met young singer Annifrid Lyngstad in a bar and soon they were making sweet music and love together...they form a dance band together called "Jojjes with Annifrid", touring the country in a small VW bus.
In "the summer of love" George and Annifrid goes camping in the north of Sweden and George has a spiritual awakening when he meets the Sami population and get to participate in some old shamanistic rituals.
He learns to play the keyed fiddle and at a folk music festival the couple becomes friends with folk enthusiast Benny Andersson and his girlfriend Agnetha (newly stolen from his former best buddy Björn).
Inspired by the mass fiddlings under the midnight sun, and LSD, they form a folk prog band called HALF (Harrison, Andersson, Lyngstad, Fältskog) that enjoys some local success in the early 70's.
When disco hits big they lose their record contract and disband.
George, Annifrid and Agnetha move to a cabin in Jokkmokk where they keep raindeer and grow their own vegetables, singing joiks to the beat of a sami drum by the fire at night, deeply thankful for their blissful lives far from the stress of moderate fame.

Stephen Stills has played most of the instruments on the self-titled debut record he's made with ex-members of The Byrds and of The Hollies. Needing to replicate their studio sound live he recruits ex-Clear Light drummer Dallas Taylor, who'd played on the album, and turns to an old sparring partner who had also passed the open audition in order to join his previous band, The Monkees. 1969 sees the debut live performance at Woodstock of Hillman, Hicks, Stills and Manson.

All of the people who have subsequently claimed to have been at this gig actually turn up. Before the fire brigade can close the club down, the floor collapses. Dozens are injured in the mayhem.

John Lydon, wracked with remorse, forswears the music industry and enters a Belgian monastery. he is - literally - never heard from again.

says Frank Zappa excitedly to Lowell George, who has just played him the demo of a new song called "Willin'" that he's been working on. Dropping the proposed "Peaches En Regalia" in order to make room for it, the direction The Mothers are taken in by the material leads to new members Michael McDonald and Glen Frey taking over more of the songwriting duties as Zappa concentrates on a back room role in production, helped by multi instrumentalist and former Kent slow left-armer Derek Underwood - he is the first to propose that Don Van Vliet record the first of his extremely succesful "American Songbook" albums. Meanwhile George's previous band The Factory, featuring one Ryland Cooder on guitar, experience a disappointing European tour supporting The Doobie Brothers during which they are actually booed offstage at The Rainbow Theatre. Disappointed by their reception Cooder gives up the guitar in order to explore the emerging world of synthesiser technology and enjoys a succesful career working on film soundtracks, winning an Oscar for his work on the Beverly Hills Cop franchise and an Emmy for the wildly succesful Miami Vice series.

former childhood friends Keith Richard and Mick Jagger bump into each other. Mick is carrying a pile of Muddy Waters and Chuck Berry albums, but unfortunately has a copy of Tom Dooly, the Kingston Trio's recent chart topper, on the top of the pile, a birthday gift for his mother. Keith nods in recognition and keeps walking. They meet again at a school reunion in 1980, are surprised that they share a love of the blues, and part again in acrimony an hour later after Keith finds Jagger servicing his wife in the lav.

are told by their manager that they will receive their earnings in instalments.

Paul McCartney: "Why would I want to go to a poxy church fete?"

After returning to London after a quick vacation to Spain with John Lennon, Brian Epstein is arrested on Pedophilia charges arising from his stable of young male singers. Ever Honest and open, John admits that the Beatles latest single "Please Please Me" was written with Brian in mind.
The British pop resurgence collapses after other boy band managers admit to similar charges.

St. Martins College, London. John Lydon, Glen Matlock, Steve Cook and Paul Jones play their first concert as a band. Playing 4 songs in the course of the 2 1/2 hour gig, the band presented the songs as a conceptual piece telling the story of the French Revolution from the point of view of Louis XVI. Popular with history students and pot heads, the band quickly became a mid size act in the prog scene and Lydon was considered to have a beautiful, sonorific voice by most critics.

One attendee of the St. Martins gig, Charlie Harper, left the gig with a feeling of frustration and boredom. He had the idea, later that night, to change the direction of his band to do songs that were shorter and more energetic. His band, the UK Subs, were subsequently credited with inventing punk rock and killing off prog and with it, The Sex Pistols.

Willie Kizart, the guitarist for Ike Turners band The Kings Of Rhythm nearly loses his amplifier from the roof of the bands car on their way to a recording session at Sun with Sam Phillips. Only a particularly strong reef knot tied by Jackie Brenston saves the hapless combo.
At the consequent session a reworking of "Cadillac Boogie" called "Rocket 88" is tried, but Phillips feels that "something is missing" and the song is quickly dropped.
Rock and Roll as we know it never happens. In fact we are fated to 60 years of white bread m.o.r. dominated by Patti Page and Guy Mitchell.

At the Chippenham police station, a shaken Gene Vincent places a transatlantic phone call to a friend to tell him about the car crash he was in the night before. A tyre blew out, but the driver managed to bring the car under control and he, Eddie Cochran and Sharon Sheeley were shaken but not hurt.

His friend, Buddy Holly, replies that it sounded like a terrible plane trip he took the year before that had him swear off flying for good.

Nearby, Police Cadet Harman eyes off Cochran's guitar and wonders...

George Harrison sets fire to an ashtray during the recording of Helter Skelter. The dropped ashtray sets off a massive blaze which destroys the studios and completely guts the Abbey Road building.

All of the master tapes for their latest recording are lost and the band's Apple label goes into administration facing lawsuits from all angles.

Their reputation completely tarnished, none of the Beatles ever work again, apart from Ringo Starr who works as a session musician under his real name.

Devastated at his momentary lapse of reason, George joins the International Society for Krishna Consciousness and is never heard of again having assumed a different name.