A Day In The Life. still working on that one.

... my father inventing the question mark.

Elton John & the parachutes

Marc Almond & .... you know the rest

Alexandra O'Neil and the German riot

Primal Scream and that plane

Depeche Mode and that elivated backstage 'area'.

Dave Gahhan and the rolex

Pete Townsend meeeting up with Phil Lynott and catching up with old times.....

Errr that's enough for now

It is. Believe me.

that is all

That was me.

played the sax solo on Baker Street.

The electronics company, own the town of Eindhoven; and every first-born son born there has to try out for PSV Eindhoven.

.

That the sleeve for each single cost more to produce than the shop price.

It went horribly wrong. What we see on our television screens is a cgi manifestation.

Anyone - absolutely anyone - who meets him in person has to sign the official secrets act and not mention his head is in fact swathed in elastoplasts. The cost of all of this so far is estimated at approximately 23 million pounds.

It's true. It is.

Signed
Aldridge Prior.

Or were they urban myths?

Pigs can't swim as they cut their own throats with their trotters. No, that is true and not a myth.

I heard it started as a bit from a stand up comedy routine, but of course that may not be true.

Scuba diver found after bush fire

On the scene of a bush fire, fire officials discover the body of a man who was wearing a wet suit and complete SCUBA diving gear. An autopsy shows that the diver was not killed by fire, but by massive internal injuries. After puzzling for a while, the authorities realize that the diver was swimming off the coast in an area where water-dropping helicopters were getting their water...and the diver accidentally got collected along with the water and dropped on the fire.

It's not true, but I have told many people that - after I heard it from someone else.

I do want to promote the idea that the Shake & Vac lady married Kraftwerk's Ralf Hutter. I made that one up some years ago, and I have yet to hear it repeated back to me.

Among them:

That he used lots of drugs.

That he once took a dump on stage.

Both are untrue and were started, I imagine, by those who found it hard to believe that someone as musically outré as Zappa could possibly be an intelligent, clean living and decent sort of chap in reality.

I've never propagated these myths, btw.

The one about cows' knees, whereby they can be led upstairs but are unable to go downstairs. Hence stories of student japes, involving leading cows to the top of tower blocks.

Cows can physically walk downstairs, but are often spooked by them, as they never come across them in their day-to-day lives.

but when I worked in a hotel bar in 2001, I accidentally convinced a crowded room that Sting was dead. I'd brought my 'best of the Police' CD, which was happily playing in the background, when I jokingly mentioned that ol' Gordon had passed on. One fella actually proposed a toast to Sting, which was rather lovely. In my callow youth, I thought it was quite funny, but I really was a fluffy idiot.

Actually, one urban myth I always jokingly refer to is the 'swan can break your arm' one. Has a swan ever actually broken someone's arm??

(Apparently.)

a friend would occasionally tell people Johnny Marr had an extra finger on one hand, which is why he is such a great guitarist.

small cock. On the other hand though......

And I say Mick Jagger has a tiny todger

One of these statements is possibly untrue

I would occasionally leave messages lying around with the enscription "Stipe Is Watching You" thereon. Just to see if anyone looked around.

They never did.

He is still watching you, though...

and used to speak though the hole in the top of his neck - believed by a particularly dim friend.

... and "that" audiotape.

.... holds the most academic qualifications of any English professional footballer ever.

An acquaintance from my student days was genuinely distraught when he recently found out that I made this up on a whim twenty years ago.

Inexplicably, he had proudly dined out on this low-key bit of football trivia for a long time.

to disguise the taste of bootleg liquor.

invented the Bourboun biscuit

Other Urban Myths (not made up by me) that I have continued to repeat:

- The Sarah Greene Snooker Table Incident (TMFTL?)
- The Stevie Nicks Cocaine in the lower cavity incident

... worth £35 million.

won a hefty jackpot on the National Lottery.

BBC are making new episodes of Fawlty Towers with surviving cast members.

Look it was not my fault, it was pre internet and Rick Astley had just released his single 'Cry for help'. My big brother claimed this was because he had throat cancer and had since died.

I repeated it for years until he appeared on the telly alive and kicking.

Never trust an elder sibling!

... enjoys driving coaches.

Might be true, he dresses like a coach driver.

You can find my fingerprints all over the web.

All of these were started through wikipedia. In most cases my original edit was removed from wikipedia but only after it had been picked up in other places and sometimes national newspapers.

I made up that Norman Mailer wrote a story called "The Witch of Westport" which was the basis for the TV show Bewitched.

I made up the lie that the book Murder at the White House by Margaret Truman was the basis of the Wesley Snipes movie Murder at 1600.

I made up a porky that Paul Raymond secretly financed the Carry On films and the Mirror printed it: http://www.mirror.co.uk/news/top-stories/2008/03/04/british-porn-baron-p...

I stretched the truth to suggest that Oscar-winning film maker Anthony Minghella started his career as a runner on Magpie (it's still in wikipedia that way) and the Guardian repeated it: http://www.guardian.co.uk/film/2008/mar/23/anthonyminghella.features

I also started the lie that pinup Bettie Page later became a Baptist missionary in Angola.

It's kind of fun when one gets repeated. Newpapers are dumb. Obituary writers visit Wikipedia within hours of a celebrity death and look for juicy and inoffensive lies. You can't libel a dead person.

Germany is secretly printing Deutschmarks for when the Euro collapses. The notes will feature past German leaders like Karl Donitz and Erich Honecker

Anyone heard it, and if so, is it trus? That's no way to treat a toothless rat if you ask me!

There was a thread on a music discussion board about musicians who suffered from obscure illnesses. I posted that Desmond Dekker suffered from aural inflamation.

Only one of my mates twigged the my-ears-are-alight throwaway.

...written by someone trying to stop an unban myth that he'd started several years previously, with a spoof article or reference in another magazine. It was the notion that cellists can get 'cellist's crotch', a phony ailment inspired by (the genuine) tennis elbow and guitarist's nipple.

Apparently references to the bogus cello ailment had 'entered the literature' - and possibly (I can't remember) people were even claiming they had it.

I was gutted when I heard that the story that Apple gave their brand their name as a tribute to WW2 codebreaker and early computer genius Alan Turing (who commited suicide by eating a poison apple ) was a load of bollo. Turing did indeed kill himself by eating fruit injected with cyanide (after being inspired by seeing Snow White eat a posioned apple in the Disney film), but the link to the company's name and logo is non-existent apparently

I told someone the offical State song of New Jersey was Born to Run. My own ridiculing of the choice made me doubt my own words. "Baby this town rips the bones from your back, it's a death trap, it's a suicide rap. We gotta get out while we're young."

"What were they thinking?" I said so I looked it up to find that although there was a push to make that the State song it was never passed.

He had a seven octave vocal range, he did. Yeah, that's a fact, that is.

Oh no he didn't. Three or four, maybe. Five if you want to stretch it.

Never tried it, so I wouldn't know.

Powdered egg, I mean.

are all the same person.

Bloke in the pub said.