They've axed Holby Blue...
Posted by Five-Centres on 6 August 2008 - 5:01pm.
To which I say, 'about bloody time'. Yes, I've seen it, and it's tripe. I'm sick of by-numbers TV.
TV fans, what should be next for the chop?
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Wossy and Graham Norton.
Wossy and Graham Norton. Both "race for the remote" dreadful.
A bit harsh
when there's the likes of My Family and After You've Gone walking the schedules
Tham too. never heard of
Tham too. never heard of them, but I'm prepared to believe you. Wield that axe!
well
My Family stars Robert 'Citizen Smith' Lindsay and Zoe 'lots of way better things' Wanamaker slumming it in a family-based comedy that makes Terry & June look like Amy & Blake. They've even complained about how shit it is. The 'comedy' members of the family are beyond painful, but because around 8 million people have nothing better to do, it's now nine years into an unending existence.
After You've Gone stars Nicholas 'one trick pony' Lyndhurst (look in the Equity book under Panache Of An Ironing Board, although it may be withdrawn due to legal action from Ironing Boards) playing a single dad in charge of equally unhumourous children with Celia 'clearly in need of a conservatory' Imrie debasing herself in the name of ratings. Bloody awful.
I'll stand up for 'My
I'll stand up for 'My Family' - it's not up to much, but Robert Lindsay and Zoe Wanamaker make it watchable. Just.
oh no they dont
get out more
Doesn't Robert Lindsay...
go home, watch a bit of 'My Family' and say to himself "God that's shite"?
I doubt they let him in the house
knowing he is in that tosh.
Have they really bitched about their own show in public?
Surely not.
I've read it elsewhere, aside from, um, Chortle
http://www.chortle.co.uk/news/2007/03/29/5187/family_row
Okay
Thanks for the link.
Can't stand either.
Waste of licence fee. The novelty has worn off to an extent that I realise there is no base metal.
Golly. Where does one start?
Richard and Judy can fuck right off for one.
They can take Noel Edmonds and his stupid boxes with them.
If Eastenders doesn't start bucking up their ideas they can collect their things and leave the premises.
Love that...
'They can take Noel Edmonds and his stupid boxes (!) with them.'
An appropriate critique... may I only add 'stupid jumpers' as well.
Be much quicker to write what they shouldn't axe
But first for the cull should be the Big Brother franchise and the cringeworthy "I'm a Celebrity".
Then all those ITV detective shows that clutter up Sunday night - Frost, Midsomer, Taggart, etc
Heartbeat should have the tubes pulled - surely they should be up to 2008 by now?
Not forgetting X-factor and its ilk, particularly those Graham Norton ones on BBC.
Hows that for starters?
oh god - sorry i'm a sucker
for the sunday night crime rubbish. As my dear old Dad used to say "it's not sunday night unless there's a good murder".
I realise that Marple/Frost/Midsomer isn't the most challenging of TV fodder, but frankly, with Monday morning hoving into view, i find it's just the ticket. With Top Gear taping (sorry, recording!) on the Sky Plus...
'Hollyoaks'. I'm no great
'Hollyoaks'. I'm no great fan of soaps at the best of times, but I just can't see the appeal of it at all. When I was a teenager, I didn't want to watch things about teenagers and their lives on TV - and I certainly don't want to now.
It would seem 'Gavin & Stacey's James Corden agrees...
http://news.bbc.co.uk/newsbeat/hi/entertainment/newsid_7545000/7545482.s...
On the grounds that
if I don't like it I don't watch it, I usually avoid early evening BBC1. However, I was channel-hopping the other day and was startled to discover the Eastenders is still running. Who knew?
Don't start
I may have my faults, but I never miss 'Enders
(goes into hiding)
I agree
I don't think Enders is the worst offender by far.
What about Harley Street? Jesus.
Salty, you are spot on
with your comment about the "celebrity" shows. I read recently that teenagers were asked to say what they wanted to be when they grew up. In my teenage years it was things like an astronaut, a doctor, a train driver etc. The vast majority of todays youth simply said they wanted to be famous! Without any of the hassle of exams or in a bands case busting a gut around the country for years before getting a recording deal. So no doubt all the celebrity shows have helped create this apathy amongst some of our youth.
The Catherine Tate Show
her comedy leaves me stone-faced, but I was pleasantly surprised by how good she's been in Doctor Who.
Like all sketch shows
the repetition gets a bit wearing and a tad predictable, but I did like Gran and the Northern couple who were always staggered by what they were offered in various restaurants.
Would I Lie To You?
Unbelievably bad, beyond parody. I've had enough of Angus Deayton's smug, look at me, I'm a smartarse face
Trinny and Susannah
So sick of you.
And 'The Culture Show' - should be good in theory but aren't they just too pleased with themselves (Lauren Laverne) and so many art forms and reports rushed through in unsatisfying bite-sized glimpses so brief as to be practically worthless. Just revamp it as a serious music show like OGWT and have done with it and Mark Kermode can have his own film show as he's good. Andrew Graham-Dixon already does art progs - he's good too I think, just needs a proper show to himself to do him justice. Well that's how I feel after watching it last night.
I like Kermode on the radio
but I saw him do a segment on the Culture Show, and it was painfully bad. He was setting up a screening of an unreleased Kenneth Brannagh film in a small obscure town. He just seemed so out of place doing such mediocre middle of the road nuts and bolt TV with a stupid grin on his face. He should at all times only be filmed in poorly lit Gothic castles or basements. Darkness is his only friend along with a film projector. Anything else is just wrong.
God save us
from celebrity chefs. Especially that tosser who swears every other word. And who eats the shite they serves up? Bring back Delia. Let's be having you.
Last Of The Summer Wine
If only that were true.
And everything that's broadcast on BBC 1 and ITV 1 between the hours of 8-10pm Monday to Friday.
Hollyoaks. Can't they all die in a bizarre hair gel incident?
yes, yes
Hair gel must be flammable, surely?
All the programmes
about people who have let themselves go and then get Channel 4 to spruce them up. I don't want to see your unbrushed teeth. Go away.
Seconded...
along with all those programmes like 'How Clean Is Your Fridge', 'Dog Guantanamo Bay' etc etc
All of it.
Burn it all down.
(oh, except Corrie)
(and some films)
(OK, BBC4 music docs on fridays)
(I actually quite like Kitchen Nightmares)
(And Hugh Fearley Whittingstall)
Hugh
is fine as well. He seems to have a point.
Dear Points of View
I watch hardly any TV other than news, documentaries and the odd foopball match. May I say that you all seem remarkably familiar with the output of the most popular channels. Since it's a universal truth that broadcast television is about as culturally edifying and entertaining as a puncture on the M62, why do you do it?
Insult
"99% of all television is an insult to the human spirit" - a letter published in the Metro newspaper.
There's nothing wrong with watching TV
There's no shame in it anymore. Hide behind your Radio Times if you like but we're out and proud.
Next you'll be telling us ITV's common.
The crowning...
turd in the waterpipe must be Hotel Babylon..described by the Beeb as, and I quote: "A tantalising and seductive insight into the sexy world of the luxury hotel industry". I'll leave the abuse to others but bear in mind that it is so good that Tamzin Outhwaite left after series 1
Trivia
I think the writer of the novel is married to a top BBC executive. I don't know why this bit of information sprang to mind as I can't see any obvious connection between this and why the programme is made by the BBC.
Yes...
and the said exec works in the entirely unrelated BBC Comedy dept so the conncetion really is tenuous
Relax, 5c.....
Have you ever watched spanish telly?
Yes I have
So I know where he's coming from
Spanish TV's crowning achievement
was to sell the format that would become 3-2-1, starring Ted Rogers and Dusty Bin.
George Gently....must die
Like Heartbeat, without the decent soundtrack. And just think, Martin Shaw refused to make any more episodes of "The Professionals" because he wanted to be a serious AC-TOR...luvvie....
The Wire
not really.
All of the above, apart from Frost maybe. Also BBC Breakfast, GMTV, Property Porn, How Clean is Your Arse, anything about Auctions, car boot sales etc etc that never ever mention ebay, all that Jeremy Kyle, Tricia stuff, in fact everything but The Wire, please.
My main problem with TV
Is the general public. I turn on my TV so I can see a world of fiction, I do not want to see "Reality" shows. Nor do I want to see Andrew Loyd Webber sitting in a chair like a smug arse deciding who's going to be the next background peasant.
All reality shows off, please.
Bargain Hunt can stay.
Andrew Lloyd Webber
doesn't sit in a chair like a smug arse. He sits in the chair being a smug arse. He know no other way and its an objective fact.
Is it too late to start TV all over again?
We recently moved to the country and now find ourselves in a place with terrible reception which means we only get the mainstream channels and a couple more on Freeview.
But I'm not really bothered as my TV viewing seems to have dropped to absolutely nil. There is practically nothing that I want to watch, and I wish I could have a refund from TV Licensing as I just use the TV for watching DVDs.
Whole series come and go and I remain totally oblivious. Lost lives up to its name in our house, and Heroes remain unemployed here. I am aware there is something called Big Brother but I'd rather try eating my own head than watch it.
I'm sure I'm probably missing out on interesting stuff, but for whatever reason (too much work, books to read, films to watch, new music to hear, places to go, people to see) I'm making no effort whatsoever to watch anything in particular. If I read about a show that does sound good, I generally find myself picking it up on DVD a few months later to watch in one go.
If I sound like some sort of TV snob, fair enough, but for me the small number of good shows has become so outweighed by unutterable reality lowest-common-denominator trash that I don't want to wade through drivel trying to find the odd gem. And before anybody says it, I know something like SkyPlus would separate the wheat from the chaff, but we're surrounded by so many trees that we can't get a satellite signal.
Phew! I'm going for a lie down at my club while I moan about how things used to be better way back when, despite the rickets, Spanish flu, young Mr Hitler, etc, etc.
Three channels
That's all we need.
Then the money can be spent on quality, not quanitity.
indeed, indeed...
...if it wasn't for Mrs Brammer's overwhelming desire to fill her head with the ongoing mitherings of all the witless wonders and fame seekers who appear on TV then I wouldn't pay the licence fee to remove the temptation...if there is anything decent on i always miss it and get the DVD instead anyway...
I only need one channel
But when there were only three channels that didn't happen.
Personally I only need one channel. The one that my Sky+ box pumps out that almost miraculously only has a listing of programmes that I'll probably like. Each of them available at any time of day with no requirement to ever sit through a commercial break or a trailer.
That programme
with Gok Wang where he gets fat birds to get their arses out always puts me off my evening bottle of Cobra. Incidentally, I had the misfortune to watch Gok's Fashion Fix or whatever it's called, the other night. Mrs Futurenoir was watching, and I was amazed to see his co presenter is a certain Brix Smith. Yes, the former Mrs Mark E Smith, once of The Fall and The Adult Net. Good Grief.
Mark E Smith's Fashion Fix. Now that's a show I'd pay to watch.
I'd also like to see the end of two pints of piss and a packet of scratchings, or whatever the hell it's called. I was amazed to see this show described as a comedy in my TV guide.
And bring back Stella Street, 15 Storys High and World Of Pub.
15 Storeys High
A work of genius....
**Reminds himself of the Blue Rat episode**
**Wanders off to order the boxset**
AGREE AGREE AGREE (ON 3 COUNTS!)
I agree about Mark Kermode (or Kermit as I laughingly call him) - the man is a quiffed bohemoth who mugs and smugs his way around the TV in that way only self satisfied critics who love the sound of their own writing do - i used to love the Culture Show before the 'rebrand', but now it seems to have decided to be some sort of lame 'Jools Holland with art added to it' rip-off!
I agree about Gok Wang programmes too, in fact i think the guy is secretly not even gay so that he can manhandle as much twix-related bird fat as possible in the guise of 'helping them love their bodies more without dieting or surgery' - seems to me he's a bit too over-fixated with it for someone who 'bowls from the pavillion end'!!
I agree about Big Brother - god where do I even start about this 24 hour twat-a-thon - is there still people out there who are seriously even bothered one gnats chuff about the latest 10 second of fame wananbees? - Non-celebrity death match (for real with chainsaws and nasty other gore-related stuff) would be more appealing to watch!
Oh, and yeah, bring back 15 Storeys High, I loved it - the fact that my girlfriend didnt get it made it even more funny and watchable for me!
PS: i'm not a nasty man honest, but I just hate how TV has become over the past few years, what happened to the promised quality???
New Tricks
is the only thing worth watching these days.
Indeed, so it would seem....
Not seen it but.....
http://www.guardian.co.uk/culture/2008/aug/12/television.tvratings
And Dennis bloody Waterman sings the theme.......
If they...
...axed all these programmes what on earth would they fill the schedules with? I agree with all but Heartbeat - it's been 1969 for sixteen years in Aidensfield. I know life in life in the Dales can seem slow (despite Emmerdale) but that's quite something...
I think it should be
about 1978 in Aidensfield about now. Everyone loves Heartbeat. Except me.