Entertainment For Lively Minds
The ultimate faux pas
Posted by Niks on 6 February 2009 - 2:00pm.
The media celebrity faux pas are coming thick and fast. First Ross and Brand, then Carol Thatcher, now Clarkson. So how about we cut to the chase and create the world's most explosive media celebrity faux pas ever, get someone to say it within earshot of a Daily Mail journo and then everything else will seem tame in comparison so they'll have to stop reporting them.
I think we can acheive this by amalgamating some of the individual faux pas into one giant one. Eg 'I f*cked your one eyed golliwog grandaughter!'.
Can anyone beat that?
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I think
Richard Herring does them most weeks on the Collins and Herring podcast. We just need to get him to script a Barack Obama speech or read the news on the BBC.
Mr Herrin would claim
that he had it away with the golliwog daughters corpse in the eye socket as he did with William Hartnell last week. In his mission to shag all the Doctor Whos.* No one noticed this as they were busy complaining about Andrew Collings biographical mistake about Hitler and the Mitford sisters, as usual.
What's a guy gotta do to get one the news these days?
* His description of working with T Baker and his outbursts was class. 'Nicholas Parsons - what a c**t!'
M Herrin
is outrageous in the most laid back and homely way imaginable. It was only 5 minutes after he gave his theory on where the snow had come from that the realisation of what he had said hit me. And I laughed even harder.
The problem is they've all
The problem is Clarkson and the others have all said really bloody stupid things, but to point that obvious fact out immediately brackets you as a Daily Mail worshipper in a lot of peoples eyes. There's no room its seems for ambiguity at all.
I don't want them sacked, necessarily, but being appalled by such boorishness as displayed by Ross/Brand/Thatcher/Clarkson doesn't make you Mary Whitehouse either.
Niks, you bastard
It was you! After all the generations of help this monocular jam loving family have given you......
I'd like to apologise
For any offence I have caused, it was a moment of madness and I am ashamed. It was the producer's fault, I've been under a lot of stress, I didn't know the mic was on, please let keep my job, pleeeeeeeeese.