Entertainment For Lively Minds
The Pointless Band Member
Was sat watching highlights of the Reading Festival on BBC3 earlier and saw The Arcade Fire singing a song.
A committed bunch, all were flailing away with earnest and making a cohesive noise when the camera lit on a lad at stage left. He was holding what looked like a snare drum and was hitting it with a stick whilst intermittently singing the backing doo wah wahs into a mic.
I couldn't hear anything he was doing. If the cameraman hadn't noticed him then neither would I.
Now I know nothing of the 'Fires. I don't know if this bloke normally plays the sackbut or the trombone at the highest level for them and was merely busking during this number, but I suspect he is one of a hardy breed; the band member who needn't be there. There he was jumping up and down and hitting a drum. When all along, behind him, was a fully amplified drumkit and drummer doing the same job to much greater effect. As mentioned, on occasion, he stepped up to a mic and poured his soul down it. Which was good of him, but again, the lead singer was doing a much better and more audible job of it.
Why was he there? Did he really travel over the atlantic in a 777 to do all of that? Does he practise? If so, what? And for how long?
How many other utterly unneccesary band members have there been past and present?
- More from Beezer.
- Login or register to post comments
-
Two words.
Brian. Jones.
That is not at all fair...
So much of the 'exotic' instrumentation on the great 1960s Stones records was down to Brian Jones - We Love You being a good example. When he passed away they continued to make great records but they never sounded as interesting as they had done during his time with the band.
Oh Alright then...
...I was being a little "controversial for the sake of it", but he did seem to spend an inordinate amount of time out of his mind, and Godard's "One plus One" didn't exactly make him look essential, shall we say...
He did look isolated, didn't he?
Is that the movie that cuts into radical poetry every 10 minutes?
Now very quaint.
It is,
and Godard got most upset when the released cut included the full version of Sympathy For The Devil at the end. He saw it is a sop to commercialism. Which it was.
Towards the end
Brian was virtually a passenger in the Stones.
But lest we forget, he originally started the band and was very much an equal (if not senior) member until Mick & Keith started writing the hits and so staged a creative coup d'état.
And, importantly, Brian had the best haircut in the band until Keith claimed that title as well circa Beggars Banquet.
Let's not forget
apart from the sitar, the slide and many more fantastic decorations, it was his band. He came up with the name and put the whole thing together.
Exactly
Did they ever do anything as remotely interesting as Paint It, Black after Brian? They did some great songs, but never anything radical.
The second drummer in the Glitter Band
Just there for the on-stage symmetry?
Bez
Though he was entertaining.
Linda McCartney
Sorry, is it bad form to speak ill etc.....?
no - it had to be said
.
Musically - probably right
But as a member of a band - that's a different thing. If she weren't in the band would Macca have bothered, at least when their children were young? Not to say all his music was great/essential in those years and he really needed somebody around who was more critical but I genuinely think the family probably would have come first if the alternative was leaving them all at home. (I'm thinking of Lennon & Sean too).
Very true
and I think it's important to remember that Linda never had any great ambitions as a musician. She was cajoled into joining Wings simply at Paul's request.
I always thought Joel Gion
I always thought Joel Gion of Brian Jonestown Massacre was a rather pointless member of the group, mind he did provide fantastic entertainment in Dig!
On a similar theme
I went to a classical concert at The Barbican a few years ago and after the orchestra started playing I noticed throughout the concert one chap sitting at the back in full monkey suit doing nothing. Towards the end of the piece he stood up and hit a triangle twice and sat down. That was all he did the whole night.
Nice work if you can get it.
He'll be a trained orchestral percussionist though
It's the union rules.
Taboo, the indian guy in Black Eyed Peas
When they started out I am guessing he owned a van.
All three of....
....the Thompson Twins.
Do I win?
Ka-Pow!
A triple whammy of nothingness.
A replica of the FA (Fuck All) Cup is on its way as we speak
Why thank you!
I shall drift off to sleep now, on a wave of emotion, such is my joy at receiving this esteemed honour.
Or somesuch.
This guy ...
Yes
what was the point of that ghastly singer getting n the way of Jed's unique performance art?
Bert
from the group John, Paul, George, Ringo… & Bert
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/John,_Paul,_George,_Ringo_%E2%80%A6_and_Ber...
Wasn't there
a bloke in Madness who used to "do a Bez" even before Bez?
Some sort of pointless dancing, I recall?
That'd be Chas Smash
Though to be fair, he did co-write "Our House" and is the voice on 'One Step Beyond', amongst others...
Hey you! Don't watch that....
If that was him, then he's more than earned his place in rock history.
I would argue
He started off being superfluous and slowly became an essential band member. He did sing lead vocals on My Name is Michael Caine, Wings of a Dove and (as previously mentioned) One Step Beyond.
Strange that no one's mentioned
the chap on the left yet...
Or the chap
on the, er, right...
.....oh, go on then, all three of 'em!
One wonders...
...surely when he was given the pitch, "it's a boy band called Bros, right, and Matt and Luke are in it, right, and they're brothers, right, geddit? OK, and you're in it too, right, even though you're not a brother, but don't worry, you're there for the duration, right....", he must have smelt a rat, no?
He who laughs last, however
If I am correct... he left at their height, trousered £1m before their manager dropped the "your cut is off the net, not the gross" bombshell, happily married a honey, became big as an industry suit in the days when record companies made a few quid and has now probably jumped off the treadmill to retire still a youngish man with a bulging bank account.
Where did it all go wrong, Craig?
He's managing Pink.
He's doing OK.
All I can think of now is...
Viz, with their commemorative Matt, Luke and...Ken mugs and T-shirts. Still, he survived, so good luck to him.
Apparently...
...he only found out he'd been fired when he saw a box of t-shirts with the redesigned Bros logo on it, featuring just two stick men instead of three (of which I can find no trace of Google images). I'm not making it up, I read it in Smash Hits.
The old devil SH have had you
Smash Hits *knew* Craig was off to better things than Bro'n'Bro. They just let the slick backed ones dangle.
And now we have Hurts.
No puzzle...
...about Andrew Ridgeley's function in Wham!; it was to stop George Michael calling their albums things like 'Listen Without Prejudice Vol 1'.
Seems like he was the designated driver as well
Manic Street Preachers
Not really pointless as he wrote most of the lyrics and shaped their image and outlook, but as a musician Richey Edwards was hopeless. His amp would be turned down or even switched off during gigs.
Gillian Gilbert
As much as I loved New Order, GG's contributions never struck me as vital...
But
they're not the same band without her. She also contributed more than you think. They replaced her with a guy who could play, which ruined their live sound and made them too slick. The charm left with her
Agreed...
New Order were never the same once Gillian left.
Michelle Phillips
I have a copy of the Monterey Festival DVD, which has a lot of Mamas and the Papas footage on it.
I can't hear any of Michelle Phillips' vocals -- I swear the sound man has turned her off. I think she was just in the band for decorative reasons.
In which case
I don't fancy yours much! ;-)
She was one hell of a good...
decorator.
And she still
looks fabulous now at, what, 66?
Bonehead
I have often wondered whether any of Bonehead's guitar playing actually appeared on an Oasis album. I can't imagine he is a better player than Noel, or indeed can do anything that Noel couldn't. Especially on albums 2 and 3.
Important live however.
What always struck me...
...was that Bonehead wasn't allowed to start the song, even if it started with the chords.
Sir Michael Finn
T-Rex's bongo-botherer. I suspect the original idea - after his predecessor as Marc's One True Sidekick, the enigmatic (that's what it says here) Steve "Peregrine" Took, left to take up residence on an outer moon of Neptune - was for him to assume the Keith role alongside Bolan's Jagger, except Bolan was already his own Keith too, so Mickey was left looking a bit spare. Combine this with him finding his silky skin-stroking skills (huh?) suddenly surplus to requirements as the band's sound moved away from the ethno-pixie-acousticoid groove of the first records to the power-chord-driven electric pomp they're best remembered for, where a bongo was about as welcome as a voicemail from Mel Gibson, and his fate was sealed: being pointless.
Here he is being particularly proto-Bezzish, with three industrial-vat-sized congas carefully placed on stage for him to lurch at and hit at random whenever he suspects the camera might be on him.
Milli
Vanilli
Both of them
John Ritchie / John Beverley
Did Sid Vicious really do anything, other than add to the ever-downwardly spiralling cartoon that was the end of the Sex Pistols?
The original pointless band member
Stu Sutcliffe
Couldn't play. Stood with his back to the audience. Only there because he was John's mate.
Ah yes,
but in this case it's all about the indirect influence - if he wasn't such a bad bassist, would Paul have ever taken on that role? Also Stu went out with Astrid Kirchherr, who gave the boys their defining Moptop haircuts...who in turn was part of a group of artists including Klaus Voorman, creator of the iconic cover for Revolver, etc etc.
I think in this case, Stu's role is absolutely necessary to the evolution and mythology of the group.
That's true
looking at the wider, overall picture, Stu was a vital part of the Beatles' story.
But purely as a band member, he fits the remit of the thread perfectly.
The Remit of the Thread
Three more from them later.
What a lovely phrase.
Let's talk about condiments
Apparently, DJ Spinderella's involvement was vital to the Salt & Pepa partnership. She was a steadying presence, very much like their rock. A rock steady cruet.
Nice to get that one off my chest after all these years.
Actually
quite a few of the hip hop artists have a bunch of their mates up on stage arsing around and not doing very much at all.
I recently saw Snoop Dogg and he must have had about 12 members of his "posse" up there with him doing very little except stalking the stage and throwing shapes.
Jeanette Lee
What the feck was she doing PiL? Video administrator my arse
Who can forget
famous-for-five-minutes alternative hip hop outfit Arrested Development?
They seemed to have more than a few members who were surplus to requirements, notably their "spiritual elder" Baba Oje.
The Plastic Ono Band
"...and on random ear-piercing screams and blindfolded knitting, give it up for.....Yoko Ono!"
A couple more
I think Adrian Wright was the Human League's "slide operator" as can be seen on the Don't You Want Me video. As far as I know, that was his only role.
Also, I think Paul Morley had some kind of non-musical role in the Art of Noise but he was counted as a "band" member.
Didn't Hawkwind have
a rather famous ... erm ... 'dancer' called Stacia?
Stacia wasn't pointless
I clearly remember her having two.
etradinglife
ONLINE STORE——————- http://etradinglife.com/
Hello! The burning hot summer arrived, this is the demonstration stature good season,
the retreat winter sincere appearance, lets lithe, the individuality, the fashion,
the sex appeal, mature you start from here! Has a good news to tell everybody: Recently,
every bought full 200 US dollars in this company, then has the present to see off,
Vietnam which buys delivers are more, please do not miss this good opportunity!!!
welcome to :
we accept PAYPAL/credit card payment and all the products are the FREE shipping .
Air jordan(1-24)shoes $33
UGG BOOT $50
Nike shox(R4,NZ,OZ,TL1,TL2,TL3) $33
Handbags(Coach lv fendi d&g) $33
Tshirts (Polo ,ed hardy,lacoste) $16
Jean(True Religion,ed hardy,coogi) $30
Sunglasses(Oakey,coach,gucci,Armaini) $12
New era cap $9
,
Bikini (Ed hardy,polo) $18
http://etradinglife.com/
FREE SHIPPING
The genuinely wonderful world of Cambridge Folk Festival
While watching the 13-strong Boban and Marko Markovic Orchestra, some of us were trying to imagine the discussions, in Serbo-Croat of course, at which they decided they needed to recruit a fifth tuba/helicon player, presumably in order to fine tune the balance with the five trumpets. Not that I would want to see redundancy in their ranks, but I suspect the coalition could see opportunities here.
Didnt Paul Simon
once allegedly claim that Art Garfunkels only contribution to their songs was to tune the guitar strings?
It's probably
an apocryphal tale.
Simon is an excellent guitarist, whereas AFAIK Artie doesn't play guitar at all.
It seems unlikely
as Artie was lead vocalist on the song Bridge Over Troubled Water and on said album So Long, Frank Lloyd Wright. He was particulalrly upset when he found he was "Frank Lloyd Wright".
Artie was responsible for the pointless Voices Of Old People on Bookends though. A track that the skip button on CDs was invented for. Unfortunately I had it on vinyl, necessitatng that pesky get up to lift the stylus activity.
I remember an interview
with Paul Simon not long after S&G split where he said something to the effect of "I'd be standing at the side of the stage watching Artie singing Bridge Over Troubled Water and getting all the applause and thinking, 'I wrote that song'"
It seems that Paul wasn't much of a team player, then?