...I want to be able to use the red digital TV button to select accompanying live commentaries by the likes of The Word, Charlie Brooker and Alex James from Blur.

Seems that being there was the best way to avoid what we had to suffer on the TV (and I only saw the second hour). Not only did you get free fish paste, you couldn't hear any of the halfwits and tots who were either on stage throughout, or doing some can't-be-arsed presenting, or accepting awards with such childish ill-manners as haven't been seen since Vanessa Redgrave's sixth-form-common-room diatribe at The Oscars in the 70's, which prompted the great Paddy Chayefsky to advise her that "a simple ‘thank you' would have sufficed".
If we came across people who acted like they do at The Brits, on the bus, the train, the workplace or supermarket we wouldn't put up with it, would we? We'd think they were insolent, graceless and obnoxious little twerps, and hopefully we'd tell 'em so. As it's only rock 'n' roll, I suggest that we put an agreement in place that we'll continue to buy the music and the occasional concert ticket as long as we don't have to encounter the people who are responsible for it unless they're on stage and a healthy distance away from civilised company.

Did I miss anything?

I think I can say, without a shadow of a doubt, that I enjoyed this year's Brits more than in any other year. Why, you ask? I read every post in the blog. I even took part in it a bit. I listened to the podcast. I didn't, however, watch more than five minutes of the actual ceremony. No need. Thanks, Word. You took away the pain. Who's up for the red eyed Oscars blog on Sunday night, then?

On occasion I have to share a car with my 15-year old daughter when Fearne & Reggie's Official Chart Show is on. If you want to know pain greater than the gut-twisting agony of Vic Reeves & Sharon Osbourne's encounter, tune in of a Sunday. If you can last the whole 3 hours without hurling abuse at both presenters you're a better man than I, for in Reggie they've found Fearne's perfect foil - someone as dull as she is over-excited.

PS Just went to the Chart Show website and Nickelback are No 2. How did this happen?

I have to disagree on the Paul Mccartney performance.

At first glance I thought Young Mr Grace from 'Are you Being Served' had stumbled out of his wheelchair, popped on a chestnut-coloured moptop and strapped on a banjo. Then I realised in horror it was Paul Mccartney.

As Billy Connolly said recently talking about Christian Rock,
"That's not Rock. Rock is: I am the Devil and I want to F**k your mother!"

It's more than twenty years since Macca wrote a decent song.

By all means Paul write them and even record them - if you must.

But please don't inflict them on the rest of us.

Can't remember who mentioned this - Rob or Andrew - but was it really Shane Warne at the after show party or Shane Ward? It sounded like he said Shane Warne.

can we have him back in front of the mic. I missed him. thanks.

Listening to the Brits podcast I have just realised who Mark Ronson reminds me of - Max Fischer from the film Rushmore.

However, this insight probably comes several days too late to have any impact on anything.