Piano Man Blues
Posted by Rob Fitzpatrick on 8 November 2007 - 12:05pm.
Why is it that people - OK, men - who play the piano and sing for a living are, almost without exception, everso slightly uneasy on the eye? I'm thinking, Elton John, Joe Jackson, Bruce Hornsby, Ben Folds, Gilbert O'Sullivan etc. The ladies have Tori Amos and Fiona Apple - both gently pulchritudinous - but for the chaps it seems a bit :(. So, here is my question - are there any great looking piano playing frontmen (apart from this guy, of course)?
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The ladies...
...also have Norah Jones.
But you may well be right about the men. John Legend? Jools Holland? Gary Barlow? No, no and no.
Ooo, this is a good one
Keith Emerson? "Merton" Mick Talbot? Howard Jones? Commander Cody? I'll get back to you.Â
Commander Cody
Form an orderly queue, ladies
Not so black & white
One one hand, you've got Russ Conway.
On the other, you've got Mrs Mills.
Oh, I've got one.
Donald Fagen!
Now then
What about Rufus, he's a looker.
And Little Richard.
Ray Charles.
And would you with Hilda Woodward*?
I would.
Oh no, what have I said????
No, no no. Me and my libido.
*Ask your dad. Or your Grandad.
The Cool, The Bad and The Lovely
Cool Kings of the Keyboard
Jackie Mittoo
Billy Preston
Nicky Hopkins
Jimmy Smith
Spanner Bags
Fats Waller
Les Dawson
Randy Newman
Jimmy Durante
Thumbs up from the Mums
Jean Michel Jarre
Richard Clayderman
Bobby Crush
Yanni
Rick Wright
let's have a look at that list...
Jackie Mittoo: handsome and talented, but not a pop star
billy preston: striking, but not exactly gorgeous
Nicky Hopkins: not actually visible, so doesn't count
Jimmy Smith: a personal hero of mine, but, resolutely, not a piano player or a pop star
Fats Waller: Fat (like Rik Waller, oddly)!
Les Dawson: You can have this one
Randy Newman: I rest my case
Jimmy Durante: that "schnozz" is a little offputting
JMJ: granted - but not a piano player, really
Clayderman: Less attractive than this man
Bobby Crush: Good one (except...)!
Yanni: *says nothing*
Rick Wright: Not the frontman / singer, so doesn't count
I'll go along with all of those points and.....
could I add to these to list of faces with 'character'?
Lionel Richie
Tom Waits
Leon Russell
hmmm
Lionel: is godlike - but not seat-dampeningly so.
Tom: You can have this one.
Leon: Not a pop star!
Er...
Apart from the previously mentioned Little Richard and Ray Charles, what about this guy?
http://userserve-ak.last.fm/serve/500/533243.jpg
Not sure if he qualifies
Ask the women.
http://www.emptymirrorbooks.com/keenan/beatgeneration/1965/bob-dylan-pia...
Stevie Winwood
He's a handsome fella even now.
Diminutive keys
Sorry to do this, but surely someone is eventually going to mention the Dahl-attached Jazz Hobbit?
Whatever he's got, it seems to be working, etc.
Indeed
I was also going to add Harry Connick Jr. For some reason I think of them both together.
Keyboard cuties
Alicia keys adds a lot of hottie weight to the Ladies side, there was a mad chinese bloke on Classical star last night who had on a sparkly jacket and looked a bit suspect at first and then proceeded to knock merry hell out of his piano, top stuff.
has anyone mentioned rowlf the dog
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rowlf_the_Dog
...and there's...
...Amanda Palmer of the Dresden Dolls. I think the music's rather spiffy, too, but I'm never quite sure if my positive view of the music is just a Pavlovian response to Ms. Palmer's rather, um, *visual* performance style.
Ivory tinklers
My wife thinks Allen Touissant is quite dapper and a real gentleman. Does that qualify?
a fine looking chap
he is, for sure
Harping on
Can we put harpists in?
The harp is, after all, technically a piano in the buff.
We can?
Oh good, Hello to Joanna Newsom.
cheating i know
www.io.com/~superego/piano.jpg
Possibly overshadowed by..
..the lady's lungular talents, but..
But the ladies also gave us...
... the woman who played piano on "Mouldy Old Dough" by Lieutenant Pigeon. For that alone, I think we can say that the women are in the same camp as the men.
Added to the ugs....
the good Dr John? A lovely man, but not really a looker.
A brace of lovelys?
Bobbby Crush...........................
and the grand From. himself
Liberace - The Gruppenfuhrer of Glitter, the Krushchev of the keyboard, the Rabbi of Rhinestone!!!
Dare I say Prince!
Controversial...
Jeeves....does One see a Steinway ?
Indeed Sir!
Might I offer Mr Hugh Laurie, dashed fine fella bit of a wizz on the old ivories, voice like Linnet and all round looker with the ladies, just ask Madeline Bassett !
Don't know why,
But it's true. Tori Amos has been mentioned, but I'll happily mention her again, and frequently. Kate Bush, anyone? Oh yes...
And to add to the men: Tony Banks from Genesis (although on reflection, any member of Genesis), Garth Hudson from The Band and the keyboard player from Spinal Tap (whose name, criminally, eludes me) proving that the film isn't parody, it's documentary.
Right Here Waiting
I think you're forgetting Richard Marx.
Two Ivory Tinkling Comics With Character ...
...written in every line.
Les Dawson (of whom my grandad used to say 'you've got to be able to play really well to play this badly' - and he should have known, because he was dreadful)
And Eric Morecambe, for the never to be bettered 'I am playing all the right notes, just not in the right order.'
One For The Ladies
Just to reinforce the argument for the plugly blokes/lovely ladies - beauty/beast contrast
Beverly Craven
*goes woozy and lays steadying hand on desk*
dreadful songs though