in a Thai restaurant in Maida Vale years ago. The girl I was with kept kicking me under the table but I truly didn't realise it was him. I thought it was somebody I recognised but thought maybe somebody I knew vaguely from gigs.

And he is tall. Saw him unfolding himself from the very Mod looking Mini he used to drive around Maida Vale, although I saw him also driving a Jag at one point.

He's a bloody legend mate!

at the parking meter outside our office. Saw he'd been clocked by me and went back to the car and put his sunglasses on. Twat.

years old I saw Kate O'Mara in our newsagents buying The Sunday Times.

My dad was jealous.

Couple of years ago, as I was walking down the Calle de Prado in Madrid, I spotted old leather face himself approaching. The street was under work so we had squeeze past each other on a narrow walkway. As we did so, I said " Hows it going ?" ,to which , he replied " Cheers, mate" and then we each went on our merry way.

Stood next to the divine Ms Grogan in the queue for the loo at an Elvis concert at the Cafe De Paris - my heart aflutter. Stood next to Emmylou at the check in desk at Heathrow.

Also had a lonesome meal in a quiet Dublin restaurant the night before an Elvis gig. Bruce Thomas came in, also on his own, sat at the next table in an otherwise empty room. Didn't say a word to him!

On the Waterloo to Exeter train last week. His phone ringtone is the Benny Hill theme tune and he is a tall man so had difficulty levering himself out of the table seat. Got off at Crewkerne.

For those of you who missed this exciting account a few months back, here's a quick reprise...

About eight years ago, the company I was working for had their Christmas party at a restaurant called Hasselbacken here in Stockholm.
I arrived a bit early and was hanging about outside in the freezing cold. A man came to join me on the steps of the restaurant. He was bearded and wearing a greatcoat. I saw with a sudden thrill of recognition that it was Benny Andersson. I suppose I should've gone up to him and said something like "You, sir, are a great songwriter whose music will live forever." But I didn't. I just hung around, stomping my feet in the freezing cold, pretending not to have recognised him.
And then he went off.

Shared a lift with him in a London Hotel. Once I realised whose lift I'd jammed my foot in to stop it going without me, I didn't dare look anywhere other than at the floor level indicators. Also held a door open for Lewis Collins once.

got on my train the other day, no first class on Northern Rail! He got off at Bradford. Apparently he was on his way to interview Ian 'Squeaky door' Macmillan.

I once stood on his foot in the Covent Garden Pret a Manger. I weighed 18st at the time - poor bugger.

once stood in front of Chuck Norris in a queue at the Post Office. When it was my time to go to one of the tills he tried to jump in front so I whooped his ass in less than 10 moves. Everyone clapped but more importantly Chuck had learned from the errors of his ways. Now he only emails.

Mine are both football-related. I once saw Shola Ameobi in the post office doing his car tax, and Carl Cort once let me out into traffic.

Strolling through Barnes wearing a white suit with cravat, hat and walking cane accessories. Legend.

"Tsk, look at this idiot shambling towards me. Stooped gait, skinny jeans, ironic parting in his hair. I bet he thinks he's... oh, he IS Mark E. Smith"

at a cashpoint when I worked in Elstree in the mid 90's

reckon I could 'ave him, he's only ickle

Rolf is your neighbour Dog Face, Maidenhead IS Celebrity Heaven after all...excuse me re-hashing one of my previous posts...

"Despite my links with Sweden, the only time I have ever seen Björn Kristian Ulvaeus from Abba was outside Habitat in the Bishop Centre Shopping Village in Maidenhead.

This was one sunny Sunday morning and Mrs Retro wanted to pop into Habitat en-route to our planned romantic picnic by the Thames. We duly parked up and out of the car next to us appeared the very cute Björn, wife and assorted smiley family members. We were a bit taken aback but despite having a camera we did not approach them as they looked so relaxed and happy and we didn't want to trouble them.

If I'm honest I still regret that decision to be "nice and respectful" to this day as when am I ever going to get another opportunity to ask for Agnetha's phone number again?!"

I won't re-hash my encounter with Peter Beardsley's willy though...

The now deceased Rod Hull was in front of me at Catford Tescos some years ago .He was buying a cooked chicken wearing a tatty blue tracksuit - and looked like he`d not kipped for days .

He was in Panto at the local theatre (Yes ,Catford does have one ! )

I wonder what Emu thought about his food choice ?

let David Harvey (great Leeds goalie of the 70s) out of the car park at Elland Road when I was going to pick up some tickets.

Also saw Tommy Cooper in a book shop in Wakefield and got his autograph on a copy of Goal magazine (another thread: autographs on inappropriate material?)

And Brian Close (stalwart Yorkshire cricketer - surely you've heard of him?) at a barbeque (autograph on the back of a ticket my mum had to give me for the purpose - hope she didn't mind not going to the event that it was for)

Also that bloke off the Fast Show who was in Harry Potter in a restaurant in Nottingham

Saw Torville & Dean once, said hello and only Dean answered me (I realised who they were about 10 yards after we passed - I just knew that I knew them from somewhere).

That's all

At the "Killing Cancer" benefit concert at the Hammersmith Apollo (or whatever they're calling it this week), standing at the rear of the ground floor, I felt a nudge in the back - it was Mick Jones trying to edge past, holding three pints in the "triangle of triumph" grip.....

Was driving up a small street in cricklewood and my boss and I driving the other way, no room to pass so, after glaring at us for a few minutes, he finally gave in and reversed. Parked up and went into a convenience store 2 minutes later he walks in, if looks could kill......

Alvin Stardust in a hotel in Wales. The GLW and I had got up very late and hurrying down to breakfast he was walking up the big old staircase. He told us to get a move on and suggested we had missed the best part of the day. With rapier like wit I replied 'ha, err, yeah'.

Finally had a gate held open for me by Jason Hughes of This Life and Midsomer Murders whilst walking up snowdon last year.

In the mid-90s I was sitting in a barbers in Camden one afternoon waiting to get my haircut and when the bloke in front of me got off the chair it was none other than that Damon out of Blur.

I held open the door to the gents at Queen Elizabeth Hall for him. We were there for a Rosanne Cash concert. When I got back to my seat I told the GLW, who is a big fan. We looked around to see where he was sitting, only to find he was directly behind us in the next row.

Saw the talented half of Wham! going over the bridge in Wadebridge a few months ago..........

On a train from Selby, also no first class. Made a nuisance of hinself by talking very loudly on his mobile all the way to Leeds, where he got off with a little portable cycle.

Husband once sat opposite Jerry Sadowitz on the underground in Glasgow and shared a urinal with Mark Lamarr

I was aged 4. Got him confused with the comedian Tom, and called him "Toss O'Connor" to his face.

Or so family legend has it.

...that I'd just walked past someone who was currently in Coronation Street. Don't know who they were, I never watch the wretched thing.

(Is a celebrity a celebrity if you neither know nor care who they are..?)

(ok so I'm too sure about celebrity status here but hey..)was once sick on my shoes in the late 80s. And then looking up, whilst wiping sick from her face she said "you're cute, buy me a drink?".

I once saw Cheryl Baker of Bucks Fizz fame in a car park on the Algarve.

I'm not sure that prosaic sleb encounters count, since every August there are lots and lots of them ... "Ooh look, Lucy Porter/Louis Theroux/etc" ... but one year I was in a local Tesco Metro when the gents from Four Poofs And A Piano fame (Jonathan Ross Show) wandered around the aisle ... later in the pub with a non-tv-watching mate, i said, "Guess who i saw in Tesco today? Four Poofs! Nae piano though..."
He gave me a quizzical look and said, "That's not a very nice way to talk about people - and why are you wittering about pianos?"
Five minutes of tortured explanation later, he admitted that i'd not actually lapsed into political incorrectness, but was just reporting the facts ...

The extravagantly afro'd former Wolves defender was on a pre-season tour of the Isle of Man with, I think, Stoke City at the time.

I was sat in said sauna minding my own business when George burst in, wearing the snug polyester footy shorts favoured in the mid '80s and we had a good old chat about the willingness of IoM maidens to, er, 'pleasure' visiting sports personalities.

Well, George spoke and I listened, nodding sagely when it felt appropriate.

Very friendly chap actually - he's now someone important at the PFA, I think...?

I once shared a urinal with Mani of Stone Roses / Primal Scream fame at a Puressence gig in Manchester Uni. I even shook his hand (after he had washed them of course)

I've posted this on another thread last year...but here it is again:

About 3 years ago, I'd been over to Wilmslow to watch the FA Cup final on the telly with my dad (it was the first one at the new Wembley - a tedious 1-0 affair between Man U and Chelsea). My parents live on a cul-de-sac and, as I was leaving, my way out of the cul-de-sac was blocked by a black Range Rover which had stopped in the road.

Just before I was about to honk my horn, the Range Rover moved forward to turn right out of the Close, but stopped, reversed and then turned back in, which meant that I now had to reverse to let him back in! As the Range Rover came past, I looked up and it was none other than Peter Hook, who gave me a regal nod of thanks from his elevated position!

The number plate, by the way, was H100KYS , so he obviously doesn't go around incognito.

I was having a quiet pint with VincePacket in our local, when Sarah Miles came in to the bar and asked for directions.
We told her where to go (politely), looked at each other, acknowledged that it was indeed Sarah Miles and.....I'm boring myself now

...once shared a motor boat with me. We were waiting to cross from mainland Antigua to our island hotel when a taxi draws up at the boat stop and out steps James Coburn and his GLW. He checks that this where the boat leaves from and then gathers his luggage. Another taxi arrives and out steps Starsky - the real one - and his wife. The six of us chat away about the weather and such until the boat arrives and takes us across. Gentlemen the pair of them and delightful to chat to.

Oh and our next door neighbour for a few days was Robson Green - then at the height of his musical prowess! Suffice to say, the singing from the outdoor shower next door wasn't up to much! Again a lovely chap and good fun to be around.

I was once mulling around after a Suede gig and ended up giving Neil Codling a lift to an afterparty in my decrepid studentmobile (15 year old Metro)

He got us into the party and then ignored us for the rest of the night. Good times.

in Herbert Park in Dublin.

My dog Dougal sniffed him a bit. Van was too busy barking into his phone to notice.

I swooned to be in the same vicinity. While running.

Dougal was unimpressed. I reckon Dougal had it right.

of Brighton and Hove Albion sheltered in my doorway in Hove while they were waiting for a bus back to the Goldstone in 1983, the year they were in the FA Cup final. Tell that to the footballers of today.

They moved apart to let me go in. Thirty seconds later they would have heard an almighty thunder of feet from inside, the door opening and closing, and my flatmate shouting IT BLOODY IS AN' ALL!

Crossed my path one Sunday afternoon, pushing a wheelbarrow, wearing a big floppy hat (her, not me).

I said "Afternoon!" she said "'Ullo" and on we went.

... Olympia Dukakis in a coffee shop in San Francisco once.

trying to get money out of a cashpoint at around 7am on a freezing cold winter's morning. He was wearing a stained suit and had no shoes on. His card obviously wouldn't work as he was repeatedly calling the hapless machine a "cunt". I went up to him and asked him what the matter was and he told me he was trying to buy more brandy for "Keith and Ronnie" who were at his place up the road and were still thirsty. I asked if I could come back with him but he said no. I was 13.

Has to be Tesco Middlebrook (Bolton) near the Reebok Stadium. Inside I have seen Kevin Davies and Paddy McGuinness and nearly ran over Ian Dowie in the car park.

I was in front of the bloke who plays Kane Dingle from Emmerdale in a queue in Bargain Booze, Lancaster.

At the other end of the scale I once met Alec Guinness and Prunella scales at the West Yorkshire Playhouse after AG had done a book promotional thing.

...I held the door open for Johnny Morris once.

In the queue for tickets at Waterloo station.

In tweed blazer and action slacks combo.

None more Partridge.

That's right celeb fans, Dr Fox.
I have had a piss next to the commercial radio stalwart then a few years later I tried to get money out of a cashpoint but it was broken so I kindly told the lady behind me none other than Dr Fox's wife. Yes, Mrs Dr Fox.

to use a locker in the changing rooms at the Holiday Inn, Birmingham, mid 70s. I'd just finished a swim and he was about to - but like royalty he had no money. Never gave it back either..

As I work very close to Windsor Theatre Royal I often experience that horrible "I'm sure I've seen you somewhere before..." feeling when I'm sat outside my favourite cafe sipping my cappuccino watching the passers-by whilst idly thumbing through The Word magazine (I'm good at multi-tasking).

Never sure if it's just my age, the drink and drugs and rocknroll fuelled slide towards dementia or if it is indeed the bloke that used to "star" in "It Ain't 'alf Hot Mum" or once dressed up as the Pope in a Dave Allen sketch.

Felicity Kendall did once swan into the cafe in a flurry of fur coat, leather trousers, large sunglasses, small dog and suspiciously stretched and coloured face and declared her need for "a large latte darling". It was indeed a fine entrance from cafe door stage left and being the only other customer, I did my best to ignore her and keep my nose buried in my copy of "The wit and widsom of Joe Strummer".

It must be awful for these Z-Listers, Has-beens and bit part actors though - forever consigned to walk the streets glanced at suspiciously, furrowed brows and people nudging each other saying "isn't that, oh, you know, errr Chalky from Coronation Street, never know his real name..."

at the Theatre Royal Windsor, me, my mate and Alfred Marks were the only people in a screening of 'Planes, Trains And Automobiles' at the mulitiscreen cinema in Slough

no,but BBC Ice Hockey commentator Alan Weekes,yes.
John Hurt once asked me if i had a light.as did Hi-De-Hi's Paul Shane.
Kim Wilde patted my dog outside a newsagent.
Matthew from Eastenders (Carmen's Boyfriend) once asked me to move in a bookshop so he could reach for a book.
and Mrs Crout bumped into a bloke in Barcelona,apologised,the man said he didn't speak Spanish,she said Sorry in English and i said to him "Aye aye supersonic" and he walked away. I spent the next 2 hours explaining who Syd Little was. (Mrs Crout is Puerto Rican )

in the Safeway on Santa Monica Blvd in West Hollywood around '82 or '83. It was about 3am, we'd just seen Fear and probably TSOL at Blackies or somewhere and were heading back to campus. We thought they were has-beens. Stupid youth.

helped a young lady carry a push chair down a flight of stairs in a Brighton multi-storey. Only when she dashed off to a purple Bentley did I realise it was a certain Ms Price.

Stood next to Rich Hall at a gig at the Borderline - right next to the entrance stairs - he was a stair up from me and still shorter.

I ate a kit kat belonging to Prince Harry.

Spike Milligan once said to me 'where the fuck am I' as he pushed Harry Secombe along in a wheelchair.

Once asked me where they kept the eggs in Waitrose (Cobham).

I didn't know.

Once asked me where they kept the eggs in Waitrose (Cobham).

I didn't know either.

I once sat behind Martin Carthy on a train from Scarborough to York. He was probably on his way to either a gig or a recording session, as he had two guitar cases with him.

aka Bill Simpson once, pulling himself along the wall, he was so pissed.

Also saw George Harrison in a junk shop in 1970, down the road from our house.

Went on a CND demo at Upper Heyford near Oxford in the early 80s and someone said "I see Julie Christie's here!" I said "Where? where the hell is Julie Christie?" Looked down and the blonde goddess with shades on was sat one yard away from where I was standing. I swear a little smile crossed her lips before I turned away in huge embarassment.

Saw James Dean Bradfield buying socks in M&S in Redhill (why Redhill, I don't know). I did get his autograph.

Lionel Blair, in a Blue hoodie, khaki shorts and desert boots bounding out of a shop somewhere in Jersey, can't remember exactly.

Katie Puckrick asked if the seat next to my mate was free at a Divine Comedy gig. It wasn't.

Sat on a table next to Clive Anderson and his family having lunch at a pub on Hampstead Heath.

Saw Roy Hattersley Walking his dogs across Green Park.

Best one - Mark "Joe Mangel" Little had a brief conversation with me in a carriage on a train once. I'd overslept and missed my stop, winding up at Haywards Heath. It was the night Fatboy Slim played on Brighton beach and everything was knackered owing to the volume of people. He was very helpful - I didn't recognise him at first cos he had a shaved head (think he was playing Lee Bowery at the time). I resisted asking how Bouncer was as I got off the train and crossed platforms...

was in front of me at a cash machine in Leicester Square once. I've never seen him since.

Turns out his kids are at Pompey Grammar up the road.

I sometimes see Joe Jackson in Waitrose.

Skiing in France is normally a good place for sleb spotting. A girl in our hotel in Courchevel (darling) one year was skied into by a chap who apologised profusely with a rather charicteristic vulpine drawl. It was Jack Nicholson. She was in a tizz for days.

As a child, I chanced upon Dennis Norden looking mightily cheesed off and bored in Bentalls in Kingston, trudging around after his
(I presume) GLW.

He was dressed a bit like Blakey in On the Buses and was quite a tall and cadaverous presence. As I looked at him (at what I thought was a respectful distance) he quickly darted his eyes directly at me, a face like thunder.

Only a day or so later I saw him on the telly being the avuncular, cheerful, affable celeb that he is. The audience were laughing like drains. Given my experience with him, the laughter seemed somewhat hollow.

(i) one boozy Sunday lunchtime in my then-local some years hence, Fred Dibner asked me for directions to where the bogs were - 'over there, Fred!' I bashfully offered the Barnsley proto-steampunk steeplejacker. Earlier that morning, I, along with a crowd of several hundred other peeps, had watched him in downtown Leicester skillfully blow up two massive chimneys at the Kirby & West Dairy (which came as a surprise to absolutely everybody, as he was only contracted to dismantle the British Shoe Corporation's Social Club! .... joke, joke!)

(ii) It took 20 minutes once to get my blocked-in car out of the Ford garage in Hungerford's backlot. Twice I went in to the reception to request someone to move the motor that was blocking my own, but the place was as dead as Derby. Searching round the backlot I soon found out why - there was everybody employed by the failing US car manufacturer, trailing round like fawning simpletons as the Chancer himself, Nigel bloody Havers, louchely sauntered about the place looking for a little runaround for the missus.

(iii) Stood behind Julian Assange this morning at an ATM. His pin number is 4321 - HRRHRR NOT SO FUNNY NOW IS IT YOU GOBSHITE! Ooh, I wouldn't tell him where a bird's-nest was!

BR
FT

Val Kilmer. He was a fine looking man and I was especially taken by his Dangermouse socks (I am not making this up). It was on a flight out of Nairobi. We didn't talk but exchanged a half smile and a nod which I took to mean please don't talk to me.

Also travelled out to Nairobi (different trip) with the legend that is Brian May in the same cabin a couple of rows in front of me. He was a perfect gent to the cabin crew. It was clearly his first trip to Nairobi as he used the one luggage trolley in the arrivals hall (or tried to - it only had 3 of the 4 wheels) and the rest of us always ignored it.

I also nearly knocked Michael Hutchence and Paula Yates down the stairs at the Conran shop as they were walking up them. They were not looking where they were going.

...in the changing room of a squash club in west London - he had a big dick.

Marti Pellow buying a lamp in Gateshead IKEA - dick size not known

...having a shit in a flower bed behind the town hall in Sheffield, and Mr Blunkett saying to his PA, "This is so embarrassing".

Were at the same cider festival as us. We failed to notice until they were leaving because we were concentrating on the cider obviously. Then found out we were in the TV show for as long as a second.

helped him off a bus in islington with a pushchair. Not sure why but having started off all low key and polite asking if he wanted a hand looked up and saw who it was and shouted his name at him, think I may have freaked him out. " do you need a hand with that....BOBBY!"

While walking through Whitby, towards a newsagents, with a mate, I happened to mention that I thought that Martin Carthy lived somewhere nearby. Just as we got close to the newsagents, who should come out of the door, but the Steeleye axeman and Swarb collaborator himself.

Also, once sold Biff Byford a split bag of cement. He wanted it reduced in price because "it's got an 'ole in it" I duly, knocked off 48p and he left the store a happy NWOBHM man. Nice chap, by all accounts.

Patrick Mower sometime in to early 80's (when he was on TV quite a bit). He was very nice and instigated some small talk while we travelled. Always liked him after that.
Also, in 1974 when I was a cashier with Midland Bank in the City of London, I looked up at the next customer in the never decreasing Friday lunchtime queue and it was Jon Gorman of the Scaffold.

Remember him off Eastenders? Well me and mate were working in the City at the time, but not being City boys at heart we wandered up to Camden one evening and into the Dublin Castle. We were still wearing our suits and found that the place was full of kids. Turns out some of them were in the band that were playing and the rest were their mates. Anyway, a little while later an older bloke walked in, also wearing a suit. We sort of nodded to each other and I remarked to my mate that I knew him from somewhere. It's only when I was stood next to him at the bar and got chatting that I realised it was the bloke who played Wilmott Brown. It turns out it was his son's band playing.

Moving on, the fact that me and my mate were in suits brought attention to us from the kids and we let on we were from a record company. Before the gig the bouncer came round and kicked a load of the kids out and the rest went through to watch the show. After several more pints of Guinness my mate went to the toilet, but lost his bearings and went through the door into the back room, where all the kids gasped and looked his way. To cover up his drunken loss of direction he looked over to the band smiled and then back to the audience and nodded appreciatively. When he came back from the toilet he suggested we move on, because Wilmott Brown thinks we're going to sign his kid's band!

I will never forget the day that my father whispered to my mother those three words that every woman longs to hear:

“That’s Dennis Thatcher.”

I was nine years old. We had come to London, not to visit Hamley’s, the zoo or the Planetarium, but to spend what seemed like geological eons wandering around a small shop that specialised in lampshades. Me and my brothers were going half-mad from boredom and our miserable attempts to extract even trace elements of interest from interminable rows of over-dressed 40 and 60 watt light bulbs.

Dennis Thatcher wasn’t alone. His wife had taken some time off from running the country for their weekend shopping trip. Also present were several burly men in suits whose purpose seemed to be to discourage terrorists and assassins from interrupting the couple’s browsing experience.

Years later I told the story of my encounter with the Prime Minister of the UK to a friend at university. After I had finished there was a pause while he considered this new information. Then he asked:

“Did you shag her?”

whose kids go to a school which has more than one or two children of celebrities attending. So, a while ago I go to collect him from his house as we are going to a footie match together. Come in says his wife and invites me in as he wasn't quite ready. I go through to the kitchen and his wife asks me If I want a cup of coffee while I'm waiting and she introduces me to me to some other ladies who happen to be around for a natter about this and that. At this point, think that my jaw fell open and I came close to dropping my coffee cup. "This is Claudia and that's Elle" Yes, that's right, Schiffer and Macpherson. I didn't want to appear uncool so I just mumbled Hi and then his knibs came down and off we went to the football as if it was just an everyday occurrence to be in a kitchen full of various actresses and supermodels. I've been angling for a further invite or excuse to pop over ever since but no joy so far

Sold John Entwistle a sega machine in WH Smiths.

munter Lindsay Dawn McKenzie a CD in HMV. She wanted a discount and used the classic 'don't you know who I am?' I just looked at her with disdain. Well it was a speed garage compilation so she would have gotten that look anyway.

Sat next to Mr & Mrs Jack Rosenthal in a nth London curry house years back. I had a tandoori chicken. Not sure what they had.
Did meet Girls Aloud at a BBC reception some time back. I was with Jimmy Dale Gilmore. Not sure who was more freaked out - the girls or JDL.
I suppose that gives me an excuse to post this...

Stood next to him in a very small shop in Delhi.

About 20 years ago striding purposefully up Dublin's Grafton Street which is pedestrianised and always busy. Van distinguished himself by sporting a fur lined deerstalker hat, tied under the chin on a beautiful summer day. Needless to remark, the eye was drawn to the ridiculous looking hat and not the rather anonymous looking gent sporting it. I did make eye contact - let's just say that the look he gave makes me believe every story I've heard since about him being difficult.

across Shirley Anne Field in my local Rymans, always stumped for a phrase out of Saturday Night Sunday Morning when I see her though.

...working at the tourist information desk in dublin airport presented ample oppurtunities. Rob Schneider bought a travel guide, Elvis Costello wanted driving instructions to the four seasons hotel, Willie Carson and Clare Balding missed their flight due to the magnetic appeal of the airport bar and needed to figure out how to get her back to london before midday the next day to present wimbledon. Exciting days...

...whilst working at Homebase in Bath. Disappointingly, he wasn't buying a sledgehammer, or even hogweed killer.

...also drawn to my till were Leo McKern, Leslie Crowther and Roger Cook.

Sat next to Kim Wile on the ferry between Koh Samui and Koh Phanyang in Thailand. She was tiny and very, very, very sunburned.

Clive James knocked into me in his haste to get 'twixt his taxi and Fortnum and Masons.

Ooh, best of all! Kate Bush in Tower Records, New York. Also seen that day, Roland Gift out of the Fine Young Cannibals.

Was stood at domestic Arrivals at Heathrow Terminal 5 in October 2009 with my wife and daughter waiting for my sister to disembark from a flight from Newcastle.

I was struck by how deserted the place was. Apart from a cleaner or two and the coffee shop assistants further down we 3 were the only signs of human life at that part of the terminal.

So it was surprising in the extreme to see the doors from the arrival gate finally open for Mark Knopfler to walk slowly past all on his own. I like him and have seen him play a few times, so for some moments the quite broad burly chap in the heavy brown leather coat struck me as very similar to the SOSH. It was only when he was level with me and we briefly made eye contact I realised it was actually him.

Soon after the economy class plebs were let out and my sister appeared. 'Did you know you were on the same flight as Mark Knopfler?' I said. 'Eeeh, no! Actually I think Denise Welch was on it as well! she replied.

Nowt in common, me and my sister...

This isn't really an encounter, so much as an opportunity to see more than one ought.

A few years back, I was sitting having a coffee in one of the Pret A Manger sandwich bars on Oxford Street. I was sitting at one of the bar stools right in the window, minding my own business and just watching the world go by. At that time, there were also a few tables and chairs out on the street in front.

And who should be sit down right in front of me but the film director Alex Cox (Sid And Nancy, Repo Man). He then leant back in his chair, against the glass and started to fill out a visa application form.

Maybe because the glass was there, he didn't have realised there was someone inches behind him that could read every word he wrote, including his address and phone number.

I don't suppose Alex Cox is the type of person who is plagued by stalkers but, if he is, this sort of behaviour won't help.

used to serve me pints.

but, he was with Cait O Riordan and a buch of others and politely refused

In a hotel in Cornwall just before Christmas. Our children played together. I say play, more like fought.

A young lad who was doing a timeshare pitch at the hotel questioned whether I had identified her correctly because often "normal people can look a lot like people off the telly, but they're not." I politely pointed out that if she wasn't Cerrie she had gone to great lengths to adopt her look, even to the extreme of lopping an arm off.

I saw in Camden Town High Street a few years ago. She was bizarrely singing a bit off the chorus of her 2Tone hit single 'On My Radio' into her mobile phone to someone. I walked past with a knowing grin and she looked a bit sheepish.

I had the great Tony "TS" McPhee in my shop once. He bought 20 regal KS and a bottle of cheap red vino. He was surprised and flattered that I recognised him... I was gobsmacked that one of the heroes of my plooky youth actually gave me some bread (man).
Also my son and his GLWn LA on honeymoon, shared a lift with Jack Nicholson, Morgan Freeman and several HUGE black guys in monkey suits. The following day he literally bumped into a wee scruffy unkempt guy signing autographs for some giggling girls. Not recognising the guy, they asked the girs who this little scruff was. 'Twas only the Piano Man, Mr Billy Joel. My son was none the wiser.

Loch Muick, 2008 ... but since Loch Muick is not far from Balmoral, and since it was August, and since the car park had been chocca with enormous cars and aristo youth styling themselves on Charles II, i should have guessed that the royals & chums were in the vicinity; it was the season ...
anyhoo i was innocently walking around the loch - after a diversion up to Broad Cairn, 998m, Munro, tick - with my then new camera when i saw a massive black Landrover parked by the old Victorian hunting lodge by the waterside ... the driver was a capable looking chap with an earpiece and shades ... he nodded in friendly style having assessed the threat posed by a dishevelled, windbeaten me toting a Canon G9 as pretty low ... further along the path on the north side of the loch a lone figure came strolling along in the opposite direction, back towards the security dude and the Landrover ...
"That's not, er, is it? I mean, er ... yup, Camilla Queen."
I nodded and said "Afternoon," as you do in the hills. She smiled back. Not much of an anecdote really.

I was stood in a queue with former rugby league enfant terrible Bobby Goulding. Little fella, still looks like he has a hair trigger temper.

unleashed a stream of expletives at me when he ran the restaurant at the Hyde Park Hotel. We were trying to load the van after a long day in the ballroom upstairs and us propping the door to the street open with a stage weight was letting the cold air in. His choice of swear words was extremely mundane, grubby little burger flipper. The people I work with have a much more creative vocabulary.

I was in Dixons on Oxford St a few years back. Also browsing the Sky TV section was Rich Hall. Somehow we sort of accidentally ended up standing either side of the shop assistant who explained the packages to us in great detail. Neither of us bought.

I was having lunch in a country pub in Berkshire. There were only about 8 tables in the room. To my right was a rather portly Bruno Brooks and half way through our meal the large table to our left was suddenly filled by eight Swedes, one of whom was Frida from Abba.

I was having lunch in a country pub in Berkshire. There were only about 8 tables in the room. To my right was a rather portly Bruno Brooks and half way through our meal the large table to our left was suddenly filled by eight Swedes, one of whom was Frida from Abba.

In the company of about 200 people at the 10,000 seat capacity Gateshead International Stadium I watched Gateshead FC entertain Woking FC in a meaningless and quite dull mid-winter Vauxhall Conference tie.

As I was waiting for the "action" to start, a small ginger haired girl (about 8 years old) prodded me. I looked down at her. She shouted/said that she was in TV's Byker Grove. "OK..." I said, evenly. Then she gestured in a "oh all right then" kind of way and then wrote her autograph on a stray piece of litter and handed it to me. She put in brackets after her name(from Byker Grove).

I don't think she was even in Byker Grove.