Entertainment For Lively Minds
Kids! Maintain high standards when choosing music!
As mentioned on another thread, I was recently given a copy of Awake, the Jehovah's Witness magazine/newsletter-type thing, by a world famous guitarist.
It's titled Music - How Does It Affect You? and unsubtly points out the manifold evils of pop music from a JW point of view. Today I had a better look at it and was bemused to see the page below. Here we see a nice white girl sensibly disposing of a pile of CDs by some nasty black rappers and heavy metal types in a wastepaper basket several feet away. Not only does she have impeccable taste in music, but uncanny aim as well, it seems.
And what a criminal waste of money! Surely she could trade them in and give the proceeds to charity, or use the cash to buy more Alice bands for her hair, or bibles, or something?
In the sidebar are several quotes, some from the bible and others from "music lovers" including one from Hannah, aged 17, who says "I see the damage that bad music does, and I want no part of it."
There’s a message there for us all, I fear.
Of course it could just be a case of someone taking Mr. Hepworth's recent thread far too literally: I've chucked away a load of music - and I feel better for it
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I think it was Ephesians 23:4
Where it says "don't judge a CD by its cover, for it might be quite good". She is looking at the cover and tossing them into the bin - loads of them. Jesus wouldn't have done that.
Let's see
She's clearly gone out and purchased a stack of CDs, based on whatever recommendations seemed worth following (perhaps the review section of Pitchfork). She's then got home, checked out the quality of her new swag based on the specific criteria listed on the JW website (Does it arouse indecent thoughts? Hope so) and rather than check out their quality for herself, has turfed them into a bin that has clearly not been placed ergonomically close to her desk with a speed, accuracy and nonchalance that might suggest she's spent a lot of time practising.
Her thoughts might be pure, but her attitude to time and money leave a lot to be desired.
In addition: “Listening to some types of music made me angry and aggressive,” says Jordan. I feel the same way when my neighbour puts on a Nickleback or Celine Dion album.
Somehow
she's managed to keep 3 CDs in the air at once. It's the work of the devil, I tell you!
And I must be really out of touch with the scriptures. I had no idea there was Gospel according to St. Timothy, for example. It sounds like something out of a Derek Nimmo sitcom.
Timothy isn't one of the Gospels
He left. Musical diffeences
Witchcraft!
While it looks at first glance like there are three flying CDs, which would suggest superhuman tossing abilities, if you look closely you'll notice that one of the CDs is in fact balanced on an enormous pair of tongs which are protruding from the girl's bottom. So not so impossible after all.
Superhuman tossing abilities
So it's not all bad then?
Isn't that
Springsteen Live 75-85 in the bin?
I have a Jehovah's Witness Advent Calendar
You open the door and someone tells you to feck off!
Apparently
flames on an album cover is religious shorthand for evil of some kind.
So this fits in where?
I mean, this is important information that the children of today need. Where do our religious leaders stand on these images of Satan?
This is clearly the day after
she borrowed her parent's credit card, got wasted on vodka and White Lightning, before ending up in Fopp on a mission to buy, buy, buy.
Happy Clappers
The worst thing that happened to church music was arguably the introduction of the acoustic guitar back in the 60’s. This led to the happy clapper revolution which is of course uncool. Throughout History, the church has provided the foundations of western musical form. It had its place and in was a very influential place indeed, influencing medieval , baroque, classical, folk, blues and country genres.
The six string strummers made things lazy and this is demonstrated in a lack of variety in the output. I’m generalising horribly and there are of course some excellent musicians in and around the chapels and cathedrals of the world. I was just horribly scarred by three chord charlatans who thought they were a more appropriate musical accompaniment than a church organ.
We can’t even blame Cliff as much of his material wouldn’t make the JH test either!
In the Garden Of Eden, baby
Amos 5:15...
is obviously a fan of The Who, so I'm getting mixed messages here.
"Not open to any agreement"
That covers most of the regular posters on this blog, then.