Just when you think you have someone sorted
Posted by Lee Rimmer on 27 July 2008 - 9:00pm.
I have always disliked Jay Kay. Jamiroquai are plain awful (and, proudly, I just had to look up how to spell it). Without any musical merit. His singing voice is cod soul in the way Freddie Starr's is to rock n roll.
I have just watched his ego and insufferable arrogance on Top Gear, and I find myself struggling to identify a bigger tosser in music.
There isn't one is there?
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Agreed, agreed, agreed...
I'm a big fan of Top Gear, but he came across as a right numpty.
and the rest....
Simon Cowell, Rory Bremner, Gordon Ramsay, Sir Cliff Richard, David Walliams, David Soul, Jonathan Ross & Davina McCall.....all on my 'numpty' list...
And indeed....
Clearly refreshed...
As was Fiona Bruce.....
The Green Room hospitality at Top Gear towers is either top notch or you're there far too long...
When can I have a go?
But hang on though....
he has a few quid in the bank, a garage full of very nice cars, a posh pad and he had Denise Van Outen for a while...I would be happily be called a few names for those career benefits....
Anyone else? How about that git from Towers of London or Craig "The Brit Awards are so unfair" David.....thats the best I can do i'm afraid
TRUE and then some
Well put.Jamiroquai are quite simply responsible for some of the worst music ever made. Their song Canned Heat makes me physically sick.
No it doesn't
Mr Exaggeration's been knocking on your door, hasn't he?
Literally knocking, Stan
Literally, knocking.
It's
an objective fact.
Sorry
I missed the can't-fight-hyperbole-with-metaphor class.
Jay Kay
I don't mind him, or Jamiroquai. As far as mainstream entertainers go, I'd much rather be faced with him than most alternatives. He may be lightweight, but he can sing, he can certainly dance, and the band are made up of, you know, 'proper' musicians. My feeling is that (like Mr Hucknall) he gets more than his fair share of criticism - especially from people who claim to know about music - because of the perceived nature of his audience rather than his actual musical output.
I agree
he seems to rub people up, but he's not THAT bad. What I have never been able to work out, mind, is just how he managed to become so fantastically stinking rich?
Nah
Me and Mr Exaggeration are at one on this: he is an annoying sub- and cod-Stevie Wonder imitator, with the same song put out 100 times, silly hats and wobbly pins. Burn the witch, say I.
It's nothing to do with his audience
It's his belief that he's the best thing since sliced bread. He talks about selling 25 million records globally like that is a hallmark of quality. The fact that he knows how many, and that its in the briefing that they gave Jeremy Clarkson before the show says bucket loads.
He can sing ok but he chooses to do it on songs that are pastiches of soul music - I haven't heard a single song by him where I believe he means it.
Scream
Booby Gillespie beats all comers as the "music" world's greatest wanker.
It's a good shout
but he does have the good grace to not go on Top Gear ever.
It's a good shout
but he does have the good grace to not go on Top Gear ever.
yeah but
if anyone out of Can/MC5/Stooges went on it, he'd be there like a shot
Not forgetting Aretha...
Providing she was still in the original sleeve...
Arf!
Stan Halen
Not your real name at a guess. Don't see the Word "Doctor" before your name. How can you be so sure ?
Canned Heat is one of the worst records ever made,FACT;
name me 5 worse.
It causes Nausea and vomiting,FACT
Don't believe me ? Watch this,Buckets at the ready
Oh God, now I'm going to be
Oh God, now I'm going to be singing that all day...
Two things
1. I have just been physically sick. There must be a condition - I probably just have an intolerence.
2. If he was such a great dancer, why could he not miss all the stuff on the table. Clumsy oaf.
I liked it
There's many a Jamiroquai song you could have posted that I would have been able to agree on, but this is alright. I've certainly not yet vomited, or am I likely to.
And to your challenge: 5 Records worse than Canned Heat by Jamiroquai. Just to show how many there are, I've restricted the list to songs with 'Wind' in the title.
1: She's Like the Wind - Patrick Swayze
2: Candle in the Wind (1997 version) - Elton John
3: Wind the Bobbin Up - Jo Jingles (and boy does my daughter love it)
4: The Wind Beneath My Wings - Bette Midler
5: Re-wind - Craig David
Number 3
Matthew ,i did say 5 and number 3 is a better record than JK's.
agree number 5 is garbage.
Patick Swayze is the "Best cooler in the Business" therefore he has a Pass.
Whenever I read Patrick Swayze's name...
I think of Pauline Calf. Just thought I'd mention that.
5 More - I've come up with loads...
When You Gonna Learn
Too Young To Die
Blow Your Mind
Emergency On Planet Earth
Space Cowboy
Virtual Insanity
Cosmic Girl
Alright
High Times
Deeper Underground
Little L
Love Foolosophy
Corner Of The Earth
Feels Just Like It Should
Seven Days In Sunny June
(Don't) Give Hate A Chance
Runaway
Radio
And they're all collected here:
http://www.amazon.co.uk/High-Times-Singles-1992-2006-Jamiroquai/dp/B000I...
JK Lost me
at "emergency on planet earth" and then buying 37 cars. I think it would dead heat between Jamierock and Bobby "Iggy told me to do it" Gillespie for most annoying person in pop.
Having said that complaining about rampant egos on Top Gear is a little of a lost cause as that's the shows USP.
Top Gear and Rampant Egos
I agree that TG is the home of the rampant ego - but it always feels to me that it has it's tongue in its cheek (if only a little). That was why Jay Kay stood out - he outshone all before and probably after.
yes they justify
a lot of egotism unde the cloak of post modern irony as long as Jezza gets to stay chief school bully that is.
Out of the three
James May would be a good car share mate though as he's intelligent and less worried about being popular. Hammond is a Spandau reject, ever looking for the camera and known for his spikey nature. Clarkson is abhorrent...which is why he gets on with his fellow TV gits Ramsay & Cowell
Oh Fraser
Just read your post. "He can DANCE" !!!!!!. Sorry mate i can do what he does but he does it sober, I have the excuse of 6 pints.
For me i Genuinely don't like his music. It's unoriginal.It's a very bad copy of Stevie Wonder,please Jay do a cover of "Don't Drive Drunk ".
It's Dull and lacks any kind of feeling whatsoever.
Lot's of bands Have "Proper" Musicians in them but it doesn't mean the sound they produce ia any good.Give me Soul and Heart over Technique any day.
Leedsboy got it spot on in his reply. It all seems so Plastic.
And be Honest he is a Knob.Especially his stories about stealing Jeans from American Classics to sell to Hipsters.
Isn't he meant to be 'The Stig'?
Jay Kay, that is. Or is that simply an urban myth?
As is the story that Bobby 'Chuckles' Gillespie once refused to leave on a flight from Luton Airport because it wasn't 'rock and roll' enough? Is that true?
Have it on good authority that...
The Stig is in fact (or has been on at least 6 occasions) none other than Damon Hill.
I heard
that Luton airport wouldn't allow Gillespie to land there because he isn't rock n' roll enough.
I heard it was
because he is an arse.
Top Gear
I've never seen it.I know 2 things about it.
1)It's Alan Partridge's favourite programme
2) The Old Clarkson/Kate Moss gag.
Don't know it..ok
Clarkson goes up to Kate Moss at a Party and says "Hi I'm Jeremy.I do Top Gear"
Kate Moss replies "Go on then,I'll have 2 'E's and a gram of Coke"
You obviously can't get 'Dave' on your Digibox, Paul
The most riotously refreshed TG guest I've seen was Billie Piper. She looked like she'd been sick in her hair. Best guest? James Blunt. All preconceptions went out of the window. A genuine, funny bloke. And he can hold his Green Room booze.
Roll of drum and crash of cymbal...
it's the way you tell 'em!
I am
Frank Carson's love child. FC in The Times last week : "I was so far down the bill, I used to get orders for printing"
Far down the bill
My favourite example:
You don't hear too much about...
The Terry Young Six (!) these days, do you?!
The case for the prosecution of Jay Kay submits
the most damning evidence. Case closed
Bongo!
I thought the person with the biggest ego in rock was Bono. Somehow, even when on screen for 2 seconds, simply clicking his fingers, in those charity commercials a while back he came across as a smug git.
Surely
Biggest twat is Chris Martin. Need I remind you of the "Wafting out of interview cos he was a bit upset" incident.
And the whole plagiarism fiasco...
Easy target I know...
but Robbie Williams smug gurning Norman Wisdom style "love me" pathetic antics just get my goat!
The singer from The Feeling, is there a worse band with worse haircuts and faces that you just want to slap? Hypothetically of course I am not advocating real violence kids.
Chris Martin, again an easy target but I remember seeing them supporting the wonderful Shack a few years back and was amazed at how awful they were.
Many humorous remarks and insults from surrounding audience abounded, it was a classic case of oh here's the latest record company high hopes shoved on every support slot available - they were utter garbage and how they have ever managed to get elevated to their current status I will never know!
I do stand by Noel Gallagher's (or Liam's) superb quote - "that Chris Martin - millionaire, playing in a band, Hollywood movie star wife...then how come you are still such a miserable c**t...?!"
Liam & Jay Kay
Just to introduce some symmetry I recall a great story of Liam going to the TOTP's studio loos for a pee and seeing Jay Kay standing at the urinal. He crept up behind him and got right next to his ear and gave it a max volume "DE DE DE DE, DE DE DE DE DE!" in the style of the Twat in the Hat.
I hope its true.