I used to have Liam Howlett's autograph on a copy of the 'Breathe' single. I went round his house one day (pre-All Saints girlfriend days), knocked on the door and said 'can you sign this' before adding rather crassly 'Is Keef about?'. The memory of it makes me shudder a little bit every time I think about it so.... cheers.

I was also responsible for getting Norman Cook mobbed as he came out of a McDonalds in London. I spotted him and turned round to one of the friends I was with and said 'that's Fatboy Slim' and carried on walking. The people we were with heard this and a series of 'what?s' and 'where?s' were the precursor to a girly scream-charge in the ex-Housemartin's general direction.

I had Shane MacGowan's on a matchbox, gleaned from (where else) the bar at Oxford Poly. But of course have lost it.

...but here are the ones I have, in full: -

Vic Reeves & Bob Mortimer:
I went to a signing for their Smell of... book which was truly chaotic. Bob at least had the decency to look and chat to people while he signed, while Vic instead was told people's names by an assistant.

Bill Wyman:
My uncle asked if I would go to another book-signing and get Bill Wyman to sign a copy of his then-new Rolling With the Stones. When my turn came, I mentioned how much I'd enjoyed his Blues Odyssey and he shook my hand and we had a bit of a chat.

Phew! It's all go, I tell you...

signed all my XTC albums. Then, a decade or so later, the lovely man re-signed all my XTC CD's. ( And I mean 'all of them' ). I've also got a Morrissey set list written in his own fair hand ( beautifully too it must be said- all in capitals ) on a Dallas hotel notepaper. ( His long-term guitarist and Musical Director is a mate ). I've got a signed Donovan album too. This was acquired when I interviewed him on the stage of St David's Hall in Cardiff ( er, during a soundcheck you understand...not in front of an audience ). He was charm personified- even when, after performing a song for us, our clueless PA said 'what was the name of that song Donovan, so that we can log the details?' As she stood there with biro poised Mr Leitch smiled and said 'That was called Catch the Wind'.

After the Telegraph printed his obituary, Dave Swarbrick used to eke out his post-emphysema and pre-lung transplant income by selling signed obits in the signing tent at Cropredy.

and Bobby Charlton.

Who else do you need?

He was extremely friendly and affable and not bothered by the fact that my book was plainly second hand.

– obtained from the stage between encores on his last ‘one man show’. I had been buying up old Apple label LPs and singles and, entirely coincidentally a copy of his first LP ordered weeks before, arrived at my office on the morning of the gig. I assumed that this was God’s way of telling me to take it with me. I have to say that Mr. Taylor was very gracious, seemed genuinely happy to sign, remarking that he couldn’t recall the last time that he had seen a vinyl copy of his first release.

More interesting is the ‘hobby’ taken up by my sister and her friend. A few years ago Michael Palin was at the local WH Smiths or similar signing copies of his latest book. I queued to get a copy for my dad as a Christmas present. As we shuffled past the stationery and pens I picked up a birthday card and, eventually getting to speak to the man, asked if he would sign it to a friend of my sister’s who was a fan.

This lead to each of them seeking out celebrities to send each other birthday greetings. The list currently ranges from Mike McShane, Darius, Penelope Keith, all of Liberty X, Gloria Hunniford, the actress who played ‘Lexy’ from Monarch of the Glen, Basil Brush, Jonah Lomu, ‘Sgt. Cryer’ from the Bill and ... the didgeridoo player from Rolf Harris’s band. Proudly, not an A-lister in sight.

Geoffrey had to help him as" it's hard for a bear to hold a pen". This really happened.

Morecambe and Wise (which my Uncle got me through a work event)... must dig that one out.

Robbie Coltrane (Met him at a festival back in the 80's. He looked like he'd slept in a hedge and just crawled out of it. Said "Now f*** off" once he'd signed it ;-))

David Bellamy (Same festival, very friendly)

Billy Connolly (In his dressing room after a gig in the 80's - was very chatty - we spoke about Copperhead Road by Steve Earle which had just come out - and signed it on a nude photo of him which formed the centerspread of his tour program)

All of "Dio" (backstage at the Edinburgh Playhouse)

"Big" Jim Martin of Faith No More (in a lift at the QMU in Glasgow before FNM's first Scottish gig, approximate audience, about 30 people)

All of Marillion (In-store signign session before their first headlining show at the Edinburgh Playhouse, 1983)

called "Every 1's a Winner." It's a Sony music sampler circa 1999. Its got I Try, Shake Your Bon Bon and a bunch of others I've never heard of.

It's signed "Merry Xmas Maya, Best wishes Shane Warne."

The cover shows an enormous, pre diet pills Mr Warne holding an equally enormous trophy. I've never seen another copy and have no idea what he was doing on the cover.

I picked it up for $1.00 at charity shop along with a Julian Lennon single also signed to Maya.

If I ever meet a girl named Maya have I got a Christmas present for her!

signed my banana. This is not a euphemism.

Well, two of 'em anyway. The others demurred on the grounds that they "weren't on it". In exchange for a free copy of "Zuma" in my record shop. "Anything for a freebie, Justin" it says. He still won't be my friend on MySpace, mind.
Richard Thompson on his "Feel So Good" CD single (just before he guested with the Crowdies at The Borderline at a record company launch gig for Woodface).

signed the back of a ticket for me backstage after a gig at Newcastle Poly in about 1992. It is my only backstage experience and thus fondly recalled. It would never have happened but for my gobby Scouse mate, Janet, who saw them at the sound check and demanded guest list status for us. Janet will not be denied, and she's rather bold as well as stunning. She also made Richey kiss me, which was pleasing, despite the suggestion that he wouldn't have done it if she hadn't.

And Iain Banks signed my copy of The Crow Road at a book signing, also in Newcastle in the early 90s. He was deeply charming.

I am generally rubbish at recognising people and certainly not brave enough to ask for autographs. The birthday card idea above is brilliant though!

I used to attend lots of dinner functions with celebrity speakers and such. I made it a rule to ask the guest to sign my menu, as a momento.

That nice Mr Sachs signed his name, added Manuel and Que? for good measure.

Alan Dedicoat also added his alter ego as "the voice of the balls"

Chris Eubank signed my programme at a press conference after a successful fight - the only one he signed as his hands were still tender. The promoter, Barry Hearn, insisted on signing too, although he was never asked...

Has anyone attended the multitude of memorabilia shows that abound for celebs and their autographs/photo opportunities? I went to a few (working) and more "pop stars" are creeping into the market usually reserved for Star Trek, Dr Who and Harry Potter actors. Quite sad to see the likes of Toyah and Jeff Wayne almost begging to sell their wares with an added signature. I did get a signed photo for myself of 2/3 The Goodies (wither Bill?) - Tim was friendly, Graeme was grumpy. The things some people do for money.

My mother acquired George Melly's autograph whilst watching him and his Feetwarmers play at the Cambridge Hotel in Camberley.
I precured Geoff Hurst's squiggle at a new sports shop he was opening in the same town.
Richard Baker was opening our local fete in Yateley (well known in the land of Word)
My mate Steve Galloway has'nt got Lemmy's signature but he has got his fag butt.Picture the scene,Motorhead are in full swing and the ever resourceful Steve had made his way to the front, where awaits a puffing Lemmy who lobs his dog-end into the crowd, to which our Steve catches it and still treasures his trophy to this day.

Dr John - signed my copy of the Gris Gris album after he performed a session on GLR.

Richard Thompson - at a GLR session in 1996

Linda Thompson - at a GLR interview in 1996

Dio (!) - signed tour programme, 1984

Little Feat - after a Hammersmith Odeon concert, 1990 or thereabouts

Mick Taylor - signed gig ticket

Aerosmith - signed copy of Toys In The Attic after MTV appearance, 1990s

and that's all I can think of at the moment.

My dad bumped into Kenny Everett on High St Kensington many years ago and asked him for his autograph. He promptly plonked his briefcase onto the bonnet of a nearby Range Rover (not his) and pulled out a photo of him as Gizzard Puke - he then signed it for me.

Also got Joel Garner's many years ago - my dad and I spotted him buying paint in Fads in Taunton.

Couple of signings by Baddiel & Newman, plus a signed book by Paul Merton.

Standard fare, really.

...My mum got Enid Blyton to sign her autograph book. I also have a signed "Thomas the Tank Engine" from the Rev W V Awdry, as he would come to the school where mum taught and do readings from time to time.

Moving to a lesser pantheon, I have a signed picture of Noel Edmonds, which I found on the ground after an outdoor charity gig (Wings and Wheels - Bath and West Showground, early 80s), a Leslie Crowther, who was doing some chartiy work and was very nice. Pop star wise, only the KatyDids, who were playing at Teesside Polytechnic. I believe the lead guitarist now plays for the Pretenders. They seemed rather pleased to sign something at the time. Also Mary Black, which my wife got. I was in the queue for Kate Bush's scrawl at her signing in Tower records in New York, but it stretched for miles and I gave up. My friend didn't and he got one, but I did get to say hello.

I also have a fair bit of original comic art with signatures (does that count?), so if 70s and 80s Marvel comics were your thing, I have quite a few of the big names - Frank Miller, John Byrne, Paul Smith, Chris Claremont, Bill Sienkiewicz, Dave Cockrum, Moebius and so forth.

Perhaps best of all, a lovely picture of some happy cats done by the genius behind the Molesworth illustrations, Ronald Searle.

Anybody possess the autographs of former TV "celebs" who once presented The Old Grey Whistle Test?

Wonder what became of the Laurel & Hardy of late night BBC2...

There must be a prize in it for whichever blogger gets a signed copy of T'Word - usual rules apply - NO STAFF ALLOWED.

P.S. I had a signed photo of Donny Osmond, framed and hung on my office wall for years.

Nigel Planer signed his own name for me and underneath in character as Neil "love and peace and beautious thoughts"

The Harlem Globetrotters were the worst when I was 10. Only one of them would sign an autograph and it was an 'X'. Maybe I should blame the Harlem education system?

Also met and got signed books by Douglas Adams (very schoolmasterish), Michael Caine (scary eyes), Jon Pertwee (bitter, rude old man, at a signing session!) and Terry Jones (loveliness incarnate). Oh and Quentin Crisp, as I was the only person that turned up, great man, he deserved better.

The first ever autograph I got was by Russell Hunter, who played Lonely in Callan. Couldn't meet a friendlier chap.

until I thought about it, but still not that many.

Moby - signed a CD and t-shirt for me at Lollapalooza 1995. He did a cracking set on the tiny 'second' stage and a signing session afterwards.

James (all of them) - on their 'Best Of' CD - won for me by my wife via an XFM phone-in competition.

Aberfeldy - signed CD acquired from ebay - I only wanted the CD, but it was the same price as non-signed ones.

Terry Pratchett at a book signing in 1994 - 'Go away and bother Douglas Adams'

Ed Alleyne-Johnson - after an HMV in-store performance on his purple electric violin.

Stanley Matthews - on a menu of a dinner at which he had been guest speaker. Bought for me by my mother-in-law as a Christmas present on the grounds that it was 'something a bit different' and much appreciated accordingly.

If I'd been bothered, I could have significantly bolstered my collection when I worked on the artists gate at Glastonbury 1999. John Peel, The Chemical Brothers, Mark Owen, The Beautiful South, Patti Smith, Jarvis Cocker, REM, Feeder, Josh Wink and Gay Dad were amongst thouse that came through on my shifts (and I saw Richard Fearless backstage). Probably wouldn't have been the best time to bother people, though.

I was about 10, with my dad, watching Middlesex play Yorkshire at Lords in the late 1970s. I spotted England cricketer Chris Old having a pint and chatting to some bloke outside the Taverners bar.

I approached Chris Old with my scorecard and wide-eyed admiration, silently offering my pen. His companion snatched the pen from me and signed it saying "there you go, son" and sent me on my way. Barry Norman (for it was he) then turned his back on me, as if closing the deal.

I tenaciously hung around for what seemed like an eternity and then piped up that I was actually after Chris Old's autograph. There was no easy way to say it. I hope Mr Norman wasn't too offended.

Other than that - the bloke who played Leonard in Butterflies signed something for me once. Also, Melvyn "Gloria" Hayes.

My final and most impressive scalp was the signature of Jeremy James Anthony Gibson Beadle(bum) RIP in the early days of his tenure at LBC.

Leonard Nimoy in Manchester. The conveyoy belt of books was shunted past him so quick he never had time to look up. I only wished I had dressed up as a Trekkie and presented him with a poem for the occasion, as others had done in the queue.

Stuart Maconie signed his excellent book Pies & Prejudice (available in all good bookshops) "Thanks for introducing me to Stackridge"

but I got all of the last Alex Harvey Band (after SAHB) to sign my ticket at Newcastle Uni.

The woman who played Ivy Tillsey in Coronation Street gave me a signed photo after her cabaret act at a working mans club in Grimsby, the glamour.

Not quite an autograph but my brother went to see George Melly. he borrowed one of my rather stunning kipper ties and George came off stage to swap with him.

Queued for hours on end in HMV in 1992 for Paul, Gene, Bruce and Eric to sign my copy of Revenge.

Not even the original line up.

From many hours standing outside Stoke City's ground as a child in the 1970s I managed to collect such icons as Pele, Carlos Alberto, Bobby Moore, Gordon Banks, Geoff Hurst as they left main entrance after the game.

I still remember the individuals who snubbed me too - particularly Alf Ramsey and Bill Shankley.

Also got Michael Crawford's at Stoke v Man City match (he supported the latter I believe) This was at the peak of his Some Mothers Do 'Ave 'Em fame. He was very friendly.

Also, have Ken Dodd's - twice!

Oh, and I once had Violet Carson's (Ena Sharples)

And a few Ian McEwan signed first editions

If I could own any autographs, they would be those of Laurel and Hardy and Charlotte Bronte

Autographs from my gig-going days... I caught the White Stripes two times when they first came to London, in summer 2001, and on the second occasion I took along their latest waxing for them to sign before their set. She (Meg) was very sweet about it: "Why, sure!". This was the famed North London pub gig with various slebs in the audience - and the stupidest bar queue ever, I can rather grouchily recall. Also noticed in crowd: Peel J. off the wireless and Jarvis out of Pulp, who looked like he needed a good wash. Ugh.

Oh and for added hip quotient, I was so dazzled by ? & The Mysterians at a "Frat Shack" club night about ten years back that I bounced up to them after the show (no roadies, see) and they were more than happy to oblige with some hot biro action on the back of a setlist. And yes he signs his name "Question Mark".

I´ve got Pat Jenning´s, Liam Brady´s and Johnny Giles

On the music front, Phil Lynott

The band was just hitting the big time in 1979 and was doing a tour including Leicester University where I was at the time. For reasons that elude me now, I was outside the Students' Union building in the morning at the time they were doing a radio interview.

Quite what they made of some pimply student pitching up in a duffle coat after they had finished and asking them to sign my lecture notes file I cringe now to think. Anyway they all signed including the luscious Chrissie Hynde. I didn't admit to not even having a ticket for the concert....

Said autographed file still resides in my loft.

A few years back, promoting an EP at Borders in Central London. After a Q&A with the most inane interviewer in Christendom, I went to get a CD and join the signing, only to find they'd sold out. I grabbed his autobiography What's Welsh for Zen - amazingly, I didn't already own it - and joined the back of the queue. When I got to the table (I was last in line) I explained why I had the book and held it open at the title page expectantly.
Cale, with the piercing stare of a man who has had a really shit day, slammed the book shut and, with his Sharpie gripped monkey-like in his fist, scrawled at random all over the cover, ending in a flourish which could have been an arrow or a childish 'John'. Then he slid the book back across the table.
'Thanks, John' I said.
'Hey, not at all bach' said he with a cheeky smile.
OK, I made the last line up. He continued to stare unnervingly at me and I backed away to safety. The book is still treasured, mind.

... a power-pop combo from late 70's on Beserkley (remember them David?) who I followed for a few months. Tantamount to stalking actually.

Elvis Costello - proud to say he signed my own band's single picture sleeve - not sure what the psychology of that was.

Stevie Wonder, from 1980, lost it now of course.

Ben Elton - signed a cookie bag for me at Gatwick airport in 1989. I was waving my sister off to New York; he was doing a book signing, and posed for a photo with me and an 7 foot bear called Gary Gatwick.

Jamie Oliver - my friend got him to sign a receipt in Finsbury Park Tescos ( whither his Sainsburys loyality?). This was at the height of his Toploader promoting, 'pukka', loathesomenes, and she did it as she knew it wind me up - she told him I was his number one fan. Cow.

Jo McGann - opened my niece's school fete and signed a second hand book on bird watching for my boyfriend - bidding him 'happy twitching'. A very nice chap indeed and unexpectedly foxy in the flesh - I came over a tad giggly and flushed as we chatted.

A stellar crew indeed.

I went to Waterstone's Sheffield a few years back to have my copy of Gordon Banks' autobiography signed by the great man, but was actually more starstruck by the presence of his nephew and Pulp drummer Nick Banks, (they were both extremely courteous and I regret not asking Nick for his stamp, I just asked him how Jarvis was doing, which he's presumably sick of being asked, though it didn't show).

...when he played with Simon Dupree way back in the 60s, but me mum threw it out...would be worth an absolute fortune now as it was signed "Reginald Dwight"... also got Roger Chapmans, whereupon he told me in fine Chappo style..."Now fuck off". Last one was a CD of Goodbye Mr McKenzie, signed by all the band, including the red haired bad skinned Shirley Manson, signed "Shirleeee"....also got Alan Balls when he was playing for Blackpool, pre 1966 (spit spit)

I've got books signed by Terry Pratchett (who is awesome) and Jasper Fforde. I've also had 2 things signed by Shihad (OK, the first one wasn't signed by the drummer): a signing sheet of paper and a shirt.

Douglas Adams - I was about the only person to turn up at a signing for the Meaning of Liff in Leeds - no queue. I felt embarassed for him.

My ex worked for Waterstones, and said that Terry Pratchett was the best book signer they had - undemanding, pleasant and ready to "shift some units" (said with some irony). The worst was a Vicar who wrote books about trains, oddly enough.

Johnny Hollins, Stan Bowles, Frank McLintock, Kevin Keegan, Emlyn Hughes....all nabbed outside the players entrance at QPR...

All long since departed...

Only two I have now are Mick Jones and Glen Matlock's signatures on the back of a QPR ticket, again, outside the players entrance at Loftus Road (nothing changes after 30 years - all the the 70's superstars still congregate in W12!) and Jamie-Lynn Sigler (Meadow Soprano in the titular series), who kindly signed a boarding pass on a flight from Heathrow to New York...