you can't say you're good now?

What are you supposed to say? Every other nationality when asked how they are says they're good. It's short, to-the-point and positive so it doesn't bother me at all. If you don't want people to say they're good, then don't ask them how they are.

As in "can I get a coffee?". Yes, you can. Wouldn't you rather the person behind the counter got it for you though?

I blame Friends.

I was thinking the very same thing yesterday in connection with another "annoying phrases" thread - the journalist cliche one, I think. Yes, it's another bloody Americanism adopted by the metropolitan media glitterati which has been foisted on the rest of us as the accepted lingua franca. Makes me seethe...

I hate the use of 'I am liking......' Grrrrh. What's wrong with 'I like' ? And I equally detest adding not on the end of a sentence such as 'I like doing this not' whereas you should say 'I dont like this'.

Worst of all worlds is 'I am liking this not'.....

"I was like"

What's wrong with "I said"?

by people I've just met.

It's happened to me just now. A guy has come into my office and introduced himself. All well and good. A few pleasantries were exchanged and then he signs off with "See you around mate".

The recent upsurge in linguistic pedantry and general verbal intolerance. Why does everyone always go on about the way other people talk and spell all the time?

So what's annoying? People constantly banging on about the fact the "indifferent" had gradually changed its meaning or complaining about other people saying "can I get"(funny how thousands of cups of coffee are ordered with no problem every day this way) that’s what's annoying.

Everyone, but everyone, seems to use this phrase with Pavlovian predictability, no matter what the cause. (I'm saying 'everyone' but it might be just women, as I spend most of my time around them, in a professional capacity of course).

I find everything that everyone says profoundly annoying.

Tuesdays usually.

my god but that makes me mad

...does not mean the same as Uninterested. Grrrrrr....

Why on earth would a complete stranger, touching though it is, express a concern for my continuing wellbeing, whilst advising, it would appear, an element of caution.

Everyone uses this all of a sudden. Not so much annoying, as newly prevalent.

I find this annoying because of the way you are simultaneously being challenged, but not really expected to answer. It's found in a lot of reviews.

to this thread, it's a bit Groundhog Day, isn't it? We seem to have these 'phraseology' rants every two weeks or so at present.

So I went out for a drink and she became so rude and I was like so not happy with her. So I said to her to chill out and that I wasn't interested in her being so nasty to me. And so she said that she was good to go and that if I was so uninterested in how she felt that I should so not go with her. So I said 'I'm good' with that but that I wasn't uninterested just disinterested as she so knew what I meant. And she was like so "Well that's just so like you innit?' So I'm like 'Oh my god why are you so acting like such a be-atch'? And she so totally ignores me and says she just likes to party and if I don't wanna be with her that I should just like so go away. And I am thinking 'I am so not liking her right now' and that if she wants me to be her friend she should so not act this way. So then this guy comes up to me and says 'Can I buy you and your mate a drink, mate'? And I'm like so whatever about him so he goes over to the bar anyway and says to the barman 'Can I get a Stella and 2 Bacardi and cokes'? and I'm like so trying not to think about him. And then Stacy walks in she's like 'Hi how are you?' and I'm like 'I'm good' and then I look down and see my button's fallen off my blouse and I'm so no good when I sew.

unless your an australian i'll let you go

but i do tend to call women love, is this ok?

Sorry, but I find this cringeworthy and it seems to be used all the time on here. I don't care if it's supposed to be ironic either.

Saying "I'm good" is a concept that I'm vaguely aware of, possibly because I've seen or heard people on television saying it but I can't ever recall having heard it used "in real life". It's interesting that someone could hear it enough for it to get annoying because, unless you have a very low tolerance threshold, you would need to hear it an awful lot to get annoyed.

I hate this when applied to men and women simultaneously, mostly in a workplace scenario. Blokes are guys surely? Women are chicks. Bite on that one.

aka "a round of applause", and " Big up" - no idea what this means.

Period. Also, Bless ( simpering,horrible,lazy). The Australian inflection rise at the end of sentence. Down time. R n R. Me time. ( what the fuck do you call your life then ! ).

'Bragging rights'.
Normally a radio and TV, rather than printed media, phrase.
Never used before 2007, used about 35,000 times since.
Look for a local derby this weekend.
West Ham v. Tottenham or Fulham v. Chelsea seem to fit the bill.
Whoever wins will definitely, 100% certain, be described as having won the 'local bragging rights'.
If it's a draw, the 'bragging rights have been shared'!
Even more ridiculous because local derbies in the Sky age have lost much of their previous importance anyway.
Frankly, who would Chelsea fans prefer to beat this season.......Fulham or Barcelona?

...I've been having some pretty cathartic spleen-venting with my employers' HR people recently and part of the catharthis is realising that you're actually dealing with people who seem, incredibly, to have come straight out of some kind of management-speak crap-talking comedy show.

My employers' Training Officer resigned her post a few years back because there was literally nothing for her to do - they'd lost a few million down an accounting black hole (which was only increasing in magnitude with the accumulating bills of each new firm of auditors brought in to 'look into it') and put a moritorium on any more training. In fact, a moritorium on hope all round.

Lambasting the HR supremo on this (among other things) I was amazed, staggered and exasperated in equal measure when he said that although there was no training whatsoever, he was 'keeping a watching brief on it'.

Which I assume means that those of us whose careers are being institutionally crippled by the thing can now rest easy because a benign eye is 'keeping a watching brief' on the utter inertia. Is there any other way to interpret this insult to plain-English than as a phrase monumentally bereft of meaning?

...said ironically. I'm guilty of it myself, but it's now annoying me.

'cos the Hand Ain't Listening!

(think that's correct?)

is going to post any sentence that contains: acronyms, cliches, "americanisms", jargon, por spelling, less than perfect grammar and no word or phrase not present in the Coronation special edition of the Radio Times?

Your face will be moving forward to my fist if I hear that one more time.

They're not for 'doing' in the first place. This kind of thing has got to be stopped.

I happened to be watching GOM least night on some dodgy satellite channel and one of them was ranting about the Australian interrogative inflection that the young seem to intone at the end of each sentence. I don't like it either. Actually this thread is a bit Grumpy Old Men isn't it?

Stephen Fry's relatively recent podcast on (the English ) language says everything I'd like to say on this topic far more eloquently than I could, of course. His views may surprise you...

As in,

"Do you want to come with?"

It drives me up the flipping.

should be gone

...tends to be enough for me.

Not yeah-yeah-yeah, said very quickly.

Can seemingly increase to yeah x 4 or even yeah x 5 if extremely keen to concur.

A lot of "big asks" around these days too. Said by big arses.

Amazing, brilliant, ace, cool, peachy,awesome - all overused.

Bandersnatch, capercaillie, skua, auk - birds that rarely get dropped into conversation.

Linguistic hates: Going forward, target-setting, politically correct, nanny state, the public has a right to know, clamping, freedom of information, data protection, no walking, no smoking, no spitting, no parking, no skateboarding, no cycling, no tipping, no fishing, no loitering, administration fee, handling charge, postage and packing, all our lines are busy, downsizing, quantatitive easing, credit crunch, and the 35 year old sale at Allied Carpets!

And where might that be, precisely?

Province?

Said very quickly by teenage shop assistant. Sometimes I ask them to repeat what they just said. They then say "Oh, er, I was just saying see you later...".

Then after a reciprocal pleasantry I pop my monocle back in and stride decisively out of the shop. Teenage shop assistant no doubt shares a discreet "wanker" gesture with colleague, quite rightly.

is very bad. It is intensely annoying and becoming more and more commonplace.
I think soon I shall be replying "Your bad what, exactly?"

new phrases like "Have a nice day" with old/ancient ones like "You're in the groove Jackson." Perhaps even "Dullsville daddyo" could be revived. It could be amusing, although I suspect some would think it a "diabolical liberty".

I think they've picked it up from Gordon Ramsey but it is a loathsome affectation, no?

EDIT - see also 'de nos jours'. What's wrong with 'of our time'?

Spoken in the questioning, sneery tones of one who feels you're not quite with it, or has just said something already obvious to the rest of the room.

'Like, "Hello?" Like we didn't know that?'

Cannot stand it. Always makes me take a deep breath to calm down. Once I've done that I lamp the sarky twat.

Oh, the kids today. I can remember when this was all fields.

Pthhhhyukkkk!

Why? Am I studying to be an ophthalmologist? When did we stop having eye tests at the opticians? More importantly, when did we start using language used by the unfeasibly good looking staff of that ER? I blame George Clooney.

Do I not like that!

life's too short to spend it whining to people you don't know.
(but is that what i am doing now? ironic maybe?)

Take a chill pill why don't you?

As asked by shop assistants... as if I've escaped from the local mental asylum and need care in the community.

What was so wrong with "Can I help you, Sir?"

.

I keep on hearing it. God's teeth, it's like being surrounded by scholl wearing hairy legged lank haired chamomile engorged christ harpies. And the picures of their bloody offspring on mobiles. So you can pro-create.So what.
Bugger off.

because they think they're at the center of the universe and the star of their own little insipid dramedy where EVERYONE is watching their zany misadventures. United States of Narcissism, you know..and I AM American so I know of which I speak...

"What's your take" instead of "What's your opnion".
Bloody nonsense !

...is quite annoying

Will someone send Louis Walsh and those other X Factor judges on an elementary maths course.

No he bloody shouldn't. He's a f**king rock star. His job is to take drugs, drink vats of booze and act like an immature, spoilt twat.

No he bloody shouldn't. He's a footballer. His job is to kick a spherical object around on grass and cultivate relationships with surgically-enhanced glamour girls.

I think one will find that that particular social responsibility falls to parents.

bloody meercat

I find people objecting to cliched phrases in a literal fashion quite tiresome. A classic example is the time-honoured football phrase 'it was a game of two halves'. This usually prompts outraged responses along the lines of 'Duh! All football games have two halves, you idiot!'

For the hard of understanding, what is meant by this phrase is "in the first half we played like Brazil, while in the second we were more like the Blue Brazil (Cowdenbeath, trivia fans!)"

See also 'at the end of the day, it's goals that count'. Translation: "while the world may admire our free-flowing total football (Cowdenbeath again?), we're not going to achieve anything unless we score a goal or two".

These innocuous and perfectly understandable (if hackneyed) phrases seem to send people into Clarkson-style fits of apoplexy for some reason. Maybe a chill-pill is required m8 ;-)

Where? Is it Wolverhampton again?

Gutted......as in 'I am gutted' which really should be translated to 'I am disappointed with the outcome' Gutted is an extreme word whereas as those who use it are often a little disappointed.

Plus 'going on a journey'........

I won't describe my annoyance about this expression.

Apparently the Beatles did it in the sixties. Hmmmmm. Indeed.

Lepidoptera are beautiful. Football isn't.

Gimme Swan Lake anyday.

Just dislike football. My late Grandfather was goalie for Aston Villa in the 30's ( William Carey ). Also for Manchester, I believe.

but coverage and analysis is disproportionate in comparison to other sports and activities

Have we had this one already? If so, soz.

I'm quite comfortable with the ongoing perversion/enrichment of the Queen's English, as spoken by youths, hipsters and media-types. Few of the examples above get my goat - rather, I tend to be amused by the inventiveness of it all.

No, what rattles my cage is not a million miles away from Carl Parker's point about Virgin Media and their informal chumminess. It's when food and drink manufacturers try too hard to be all, like, cool and laid-back with the text that appears on the packaging of their products. Innocent - the fruit smoothies - are the worst in this regard. Their carton seems to think it's achieved some kind of emergent sentience! It's all in the first person. "Please put me in the fridge", "shake me before opening" etc. No! You're an inanimate, transient consumer item! 'You' are not even a 'you' in any case, merely a quotidian example of disposable consumer flotsam. How dare 'you' think it's OK to be so intimate with me, Mister Tetra-pak? But it's not just them - dozens of ordinary grocery items are trying to make friends with you by using the first person. Dispose of me carefully. Drink me responsibly. I am made from a sustainable resource. Enough already!

I know, I know: it's all about developing a relationship with a brand, this product makes me feel good, this product is for people like me, this brand is modern and different, blah blah. Well I'm sorry but all it says to me is "this product is marketed by pricks, and probably purchased by pricks, do not buy it again". So there.

Bring back the olden days - it mightn't have been much to look at, but at least you knew where you were with a brown paper bag.

Cashpoints/ATMs often have personality here in NZ. If they are out of order, a face appears with a thermometer sticking out its mouth, saying "I'm crook".

Or if you get your PIN wrong, it'll say "Oops! Wooah there! Try again and this time try to take it a little more slowly"

Or if you're overdrawn "You are out of moolah"

I don't think I'll bother visiting New Zealand.

I refuse to holiday in any country which offers "zany" cashpoints.

The withdrawal of one's hard-earned money from an ATM machine is a serious procedure, oftentimes fraught with danger (will it chew my card up this time? Is that curiously hairy man standing behind me clocking my PIN number?), and not one to be trivialised by an over-familiar cashpoint.

I like my cashpoints strict and humourless - the standard British "PLEASE TAKE YOUR MONEY" or "YOU HAVE NO AVAILABLE FUNDS, PISS OFF" are quite adequate and permit no possible risk of developing some sort of relationship with your ATM.

3 lads on the train this morning seemingly heading off to gamble with more of our money in the city and amongst the inevitable "wells" and "likes" etc - "this week is like, well long", wafted an "arsted". I'm sorry did I hear that right? Arsted! As in "I arsted her what she wanted". Ahh all is becoming clear, he meant "asked".

Even "arst" would have bordered acceptability, but "arsted", give me strength. What's more the other two didn't even pause to ridicule it.

I work with builders who use expletives as a form punctuation, and for whom volume is preferable to content, so I'm used to a certain amount of bastardisation, but at least the general gist of what's being said is identifiable. These "suits" were just making a mockery of our language.

ax them what they meant. innit?

is a really weird one. It seems to be used by a lot of people as the norm but seems really hard to pronounce or is that just me. Try saying "I arksed him"

No you didn't you went there on bloody holiday! Drives me insane.

Also people who order sandwiches "on brown", "on white" etc. I'm not sure why this method of ordering sandwiches annoys me but it does.

I also have an irrational dislike of window cleaners - no idea why.

" Aye, not so bad." when asked how I am.

The worst thing is, it's become involuntary, and I know exactly where it came from - Robert Carlyle says it in 'The Full Monty', when quizzed by a passing dog-walker. Whilst stuck on a sinking wreck of a car in the middle of a Sheffield canal.

I suspect most of these posters are men- because there's a whole world of annoying phrases that ony women know about. Most of my female friends say "hun" in texts, when obviously, they are shortening "Honey" so it should be "hon" (even though it's a bit Nancy Mitford) - but god, it's annoying.
Also, fashion... we don't say "she modelled for" , eg, Prada, anymore- we have to say "she walked for". And To Die For and Lust Have (I blame Grazia for that one.) And the one that makes me want to curl up in a ball of raging hate because it's such pathetically lazy journalism- "xxx, anyone?" (as in "George Clooney, anyone?" I have never seen a male jourmalist do this, but female ones do it all the time.. and I am one. I'm not proud. Oh and one more- "result!" in the lads-mag, "nice one, mate" context. It's unbearable...