You miserable beggar...but it would probably come out as a weedy "hello".

.

The people at the theatre I work at was told by his people, we wern't allowed to look at him.He always walked in/out stage door with 2 big gorillas on either side.The stage door guy told me he always looked at him but didn't say anything to him.

I'd say, "Alright Bob, how you doing? Fancy coming down the road for a cup of tea and a slice of hot buttered toast?" because, and not many people know this, there's nothing that Bob likes better than a cup of tea (PG Tips, made in the cup for preference) and a slice of hot buttered toast. So that's a tip for you, if you ever meet him. And don't forget who told you.

In 1993 I walked out of my flat onto Camden High Street in London nursing a bastard of a hangover. In the distance I could see this guy coming towards me wearing a long black coat and a stovepipe hat. "Hmmm", I thought to myself, "he really looks like Bob Dylan." The gent drew closer, and I realized that it was Bob Dylan. I knew right away that I couldn't speak to him. The perilous state of my brain was such that I was unsure of being able to form words, let alone a coherent sentence. And what was I going to say to him? "Hey Bob, thanks for the music." or some other crap like that? Silence was the better option.

I later found out he was in Camden to shoot the album cover for 'World Gone Wrong'... a restaurant up the road from where I lived had been chosen as the location.

He did speak with lots of other people... there was some footage on You Tube but I can't locate it.

of Brian, Keith and Mick - and you thought you had a chance with her?"

Called Bobby Wants to Meet Me from about 1980. A fanzine writer gets an invite to go backstage at Earl's Court '78 shows and can't figure out how the hell you start a conversation with Bob.

It ends with him emerging from backstage and telling his mate: "We just...talked."

Terry, or Jimmy, or Bobby, or… er… Zimmy?

we have forgiven Self Portrait. Oh, and I liked your hat in Malmö.

with a knowing smile, or kind of guilty deference, or even upfront "hey you know who I'm talking about" menace -

but he'd just walk on - still, worth a try and probably better than all the usual naff things idiots like me would say

But I'd mumble it.

See how he bloody likes it.

thank you for the music, the songs you're singing, thanks for all the joy they're bringing" and then wait to see if there was a glimmer of recognition.

"Hey Bob, how's it going?"

However, since I have become bored with this question after three decades of asking it, I would change the order of the words. I would also randomly adjust my cadence and emphasis from syllable to syllable.

I would then move on to other inconsequential topics of conversation, changing the subject frequently and abruptly. I would carry on in this manner until all public transport in our local area had ground to a halt for the night. At the end of our conversation I would present Bob with a bill for £100.

I would have thought he's had to speak to so many nutters in his life a veil of silence is justified.

...for all the fawning and sycophancy he's had to put up with from People A Certain Age over the years.

He's a songwriter; who's written quite a few good ones over the years; some of which even his awful voice couldn't ruin.

'Hey, Mr Tambourine Man, when is your tour gonna finish?'

Can you lend us a tenner please Bob.

I wish that just one time I could stand in your shoes and for that one moment I could be you. Only trouble is it might turn out that I learn what a drag it is for you to see me.

... which is what he said to me in '92.

C'mon Bob, what are your songs really about these days? And don't say "Oh about 5 minutes, 7 minutes, some are even 9 minutes". I've heard that one before.

Where's your evidence that lions ever swim in the ocean?

I'd have to say "There must be some way out of here"...

But there's a book about this called If You See Him, Say Hello. There's a website with some free excerpts that tell about people's encounters with His Bobness. It's worth checking out at:

http://www.humblepress.com/Encounters/index.html

Bob,Why the F&$@ NOT ? S.C. 2008

..pedal steel and never play it?
Are you nuts, or what?

Well, that's what a policewoman said to him in July:

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20090815/ap_en_mu/us_people_bob_dylan_6

a toke?

http://ow.ly/k7Uo

I would ask him "How does it feel to be on your own?"

..is that true?"

my opening gambit would go something like this:
"Good morning, Mr. Dylan. ... Are you lost?"

But only if he looked like he needed assistance. Otherwise, I'd leave him be, like I do with all strangers.

Of course, if he had some uncontrollable need to pass a few moments having a chat with me I'd be more than happy to hold up my end of the conversation. Under those circumstances, I would guess that he'd rather not talk about himself or any field of popular culture that he's been involved in. It must get tedious and I wouldn't really understand what he was on about anyway.

It would be more satisfactory for both of us if it was a subject we both knew a little about. I could tell him where to find some wild blackberries and he could tell me what to do with them.

I hope that helps.

You mumble
And all your fans are blokey dullards

"So, what was it like meeting Frank Sinatra for the first time".

or

"I hear you were the reason Phil Ochs killed himself".