I was apparently in shot at the 1996 FA Cup final. I was sat behind a couple of slebs and when the camera picked them out, there was I.

Star very rarely in Hollyoaks,go on I dare ya.

Once in the background on a news story about some racing cars, and twice (2 different news programmes covered it) participating in a giant food fight at Marischal College in Aberdeen (students eh?), a traditional part of the rectorial election campaign there. I say traditional; I think we were the first year to have done it in decades and I doubt the university let anyone do it again.

I've seen myself on the BBC local news on the tube twice. The first time I saw the camera crew on the platform at Finsbury Park only a matter of weeks after moving to London. I was surprised to see myself that evening, but not as surprised as when, many years later, I saw myself boarding a train at Victoria while I sat awaiting my meal in a Chinese takeaway. The second time I'd not seen the camera.
The possibility of appearing in the background in Hollyoaks makes me happy to have left Chester.

Caught on camera browsing in a record store as the news crews were reporting on it's imminent demise.
Interviewed for some nonsensical TV show's "vox populi" segment on how well or badly the local government had been doing
Appeared on a Spanish TV show ,telling jokes , in Spanish !

Whilst introducing Swedish friends to the delights of, among other things, the hand-raised pork pie, in a pub garden in an idyllic Oxfordshire village, whose lovely lanes were once frequented by William Morris, a small Sunday lunch crowd were joined by a rather out of place lanky, dandy stick insect of a chap, othwerwise known as Pete Doherty shortly to be joined by his then beau Kate Moss and their entourage. Following in their wake was to be seen a few rough looking paparazzi, one stout fellow with a huge video camera on his shoulder.

Some months later there am I channel hopping and for some reason (probably the music content)settle on the 'Kate Moss Years' on channel 5, a tacky non-programme cobbled together with over-familiar revisited Britpop clips and celeb talking heads, when low and behold ten seconds or so of some wobbly, low-quality, footage of Kate and Pete struggling to enjoy their lunch appears with my bemused face peering out from the background.

But the photofit didn't really do me justice, if I'm honest.

...of the Stones' Steel Wheels tour. I'm in it, or at least my mates have told me I am. I've never seen it.

1)Was on the Ed "Stewpot" Stewart tv show, late 60's early 70's i think, where us kids sat on bean bags on the set. The New Seekers sang one of their songs and The Bonzo Dog do-Dah Band sang one of theirs.

2)Ran on the pitch in celebration of a Welsh try at Twickers late 70's (sat behind the post and only a step up to the pitch)and booted the ball in celebration back down the pitch - Family were not amused when seeing this loutish behaviour on Rugby Special the next day

3)Was on News at Ten shaking hands with President Gerald Ford at The Bob Hope Golf Tournament at Moor Park in the early 80's

4)Interviewed pre-match by Sky Sports outside Highbury before Sol Campbell's debut game for The Arsenal

5)Was at Stadio delle Alpi for Juventus v Arsenal in 2006 Champions League Quarter Final and was seen numerous times before,during and after the match as the camera panned the Gooner enclosure.

... in the early '60s, me and my friend Patrick were interviewed by David Frost in the playground at primary school in Chiswick. He asked me what was my favorite TV program and I said 'Secret Squirrel.'

Me and the ex-wife were clearly visible for a few minutes during a parade (Americans love parades) in our erstwhile hometown a couple of years ago.

Other than that, any other TV appearances have been entirely coincidental.

I once gave my considerably incisive thoughts to ITV News at Ten about the Beckhams choice of the name Romeo for their son.

I was also filmed walking up Neal Street with a female work colleague and we ended up on a GMTV ident highlighting unmarried couples. Hmmm

sitting with my wife and best mate in the Halliwell Jones Stadium Warrington when Sweden were playing France in the Women's European Cup in 2006. Apparently the camera caught us discussing the finer points of the beguiling Swedish attack...

I appear very briefly on the DVD that Dexy's released from the Royal Court show, you can see my arms on Macca's Cavern gig from 1999 but for national coverage when Liverpool played Chelsea in the European Cup semi second leg at Anfield my younger brother (regular match goer for 30+ years) and myself (irregular to be honest)couldn't get tickets so we spent the evening in a pub at the side of The kop. As the final penalty went in we decided to down our pints and leg it in to the ground. As the camera panned acroos the ground, everybody we knew saw us celebrating wildly at a game we hadn't actually been at.

...in the Squeeze's "A Round and a Bout" video, filmed in Newcastle.

about 10 rows back under the media centre England v Australia 3 home Ashes series ago. Saw Warne and McGrath bowl, great day.

An appearance in "Ebbot: The Movie" documentary/fantasy/live movie about The Soundtrack of Our Lives - but my FPO beat me with a credited speaking role - bitter? Me? Never...!!

I was interviewed by Jake Burns played live on that Rock Around the Clock thing that Whistle Test did in '84 - yeah - the one with Ellen & Hepworth. Plus the Patrick Kielty show in '96 (the shame, the shame) also live - most nerve-wracking 3 minutes of my life...

when I was 14, crowd shots in a doc about Greenbelt, the 'Christian Rock Festival' (my sister was a believer at the time and we always went to gigs together). Anyroad my then girlfriend's mum saw it, she was in the music biz (PA to Gus Dugeon I think) and my eligability briefly rocketed. Since then i've resolutely stayed the other side of the camera.

Mostly at sporting events and most memorably behind Sir Garfield Sobers as he was being interviewed.

Once it was me being interviewed but I'm not sure they used the piece as I couldn't bear to watch.

I appear quite clearly in the audience at a Suzanne Vega gig in 1988 which was televised. Much better, my mate's sister, a massive David Essex fan back in the day, appears in the crowd at the first gig by his band in "That'll be the day" - she's the slim blonde one being pushed back and forth by the rapturous hoards.

... and a reverse scenario, wherein a celeb appears in a "civilian's" holiday snap, but I think this is quite cute - Susan Boyle at Waterloo Station:

(picture too big to post, go to http://img.thesun.co.uk/multimedia/archive/00960/SNN0620SU2-682_960449a....)

that Mr. Hepworth has not responded. Surely he has been on telly in his time... there's not that many people go to White Hart Lane.

I was interviewed by Lynda La Plante for a documentary on mens' attitude towards guns called In The Firing Line. It was a vox-pop, stopped-in-the-street kind of thing, nothing formal. She referred to me as a "teenager" (I was in my late 20s at the time), and the editing made me look bad.

...mainly on the basis of being the only non-Vietnamese person in sight. First, an interview about my venerable school's summer camp, then a long and tortuously translated interview about traditional medicine (a subject about which I knew, and still know, nothing), and then the game show-hapless foreigners were chosen to sing Vietnamese pop songs to various Ho Chi Minh City celebrities (who all failed to identify any of my startling renditions). I received a bumper pack of 'Instant Tea-flavoured drink' for my trouble...

to be voxpopped by the News at 10 a couple of months ago talking about sex education law changes for children on the basis that I didn't know anything about it. They were trying to get me cross about it.

Other than that, I could be seen as a very small shape in a white coat standing at the Clock End at Highbury at and Arsenal v Leeds cup tie in the early 90's.

That's it.