Tabloid newspapers...the last bastion of truth justice and decency.

I'm still trying to get my dear old mother to stop buying the Daily Express. I for one already know that a] Diana's dead - and guess what she aint coming back no matter how many times you print her picture, b]house prices are rising/falling [depending on the day of week] and c] that bloody foreigners are stealing our jobs [ ok YOUR jobs ;) ]

I made the mistake of walking past the news-stand at the local garage yesterday and caught a glance at the headlines...some footballer's dad runs a crack house and Britney may [ or may not ] be getting married...gawd it's miserable.

Right I'm going to watch REM on Sesame Street to cheer myself up :)

My in-laws buy the Daily Mail, and believe everything they read in it - how they still kept on watching and enjoying "Strictly Come Dancing" after the regular hatchet jobs they were doing on it (courtesy of 'a show insider'), I'll never know.

I usually have a flick through if we're there on a Sunday just to see who they're disapproving of this week. One week there was an article about how dreadful Heather Mills was which then concluded with a few paragraphs along the lines of "what on earth was Paul McCartney thinking of getting together with her in the first place ??!!" - somehow managing to disapprove of both parties within the same article, which is quite some going.

This is a few months after they'd concluded an article disapproving about his latest world tour and attendant landmine campaigning with a paragraph each for "what would Linda have thought ?? what would John Lennon have to say about it ??!! Hmm ??!!" (purse lips, fold arms and lean across garden fence)