I type this with a cup of tea in front of me, for I am truly suffering this morning. I was actually dreaming about cups of tea just before waking up, so I am sure that my body and mind both agree on this.

A pint of water, a spoonful of honey and two Anadins afore ye retire and you awaken the next morn almost alive.

Of course, if you are too drunk to remember the above then it's dry toast for the next three days!

from plenty of past experience I would recommend the following:

1. Go for a swim.

2. Drink three Bloody Marys.

Pint of water with a Berocca and a Resolve.

It pretty much has everything you need.

Although during my 20s I found that an ice cold Irn Bru used to do the trick, but I'm sure it offered nothing useful other than comfort.

and three Co-codamols

Recommended to me by a doctor friend. Best thing when rehydration is needed.

Anyone got any?

A pint of water and 2 paracetamol.

A pint of water and 2 paracetamol.

A chocolate milk shake and a twix would have done it, probably bought from the shop on the way to the pub for a lunchtime session.

Pretty much no my limits these days to avoid the hangover ( and the limit is low, 3 beers, 4 at a push) but if I do succumb then a full vegetarian English with loads of orange juice will go some way to helping but a big drunk can take days to fully get over frankly and with youngish kids it's just not worth the grief.

... of hard squash always sorts me out (but make sure you drink plenty of water first)

Then, about ten minutes later a pint of very cold frash orange (or prefered fruit juice).
Then, after another half hour, eggs benedict or the closest version thereof available to hand.

...you are not really pished. On the other hand pretty much as soon as I hit my forties all of a sudden the hangovers started to last for days, so enforced maturity has kicked in. Not all the time though, obviously.

I go for freshly squeezed orange juice, solpadeine and a bath, or at least a shower, but above a shave. The bacon sarnie sometimes helps, if you can face it. Top up with irn bru as necessary, though yes, there is a bit of the old snake oil in that. Moaning to unsympathetic sober people is also traditional.

Of course the restorative powers of a fry-up cannot be understated, but Britvic's Citrus Spring was the DBs for a hangover. So acidic it could strip the enamel of your teeth.

Unfortunately they seem to have stopped making it, which is tragic, as it was my favourite fizzy pop in a can. So, yeah … Lucozade I guess.

2 when you wake up.

You'll be right as rain.

If you can remember, pint of water before your bedtime, and one at your nightstand (with 2 paracetamol) so when you wake at 3-4am (as I do), downing them improves awakening tremedously.
Then:
Coke (or Dandelion and Burdock if you can get/stand it), stirred 'til it goes flat. Drink in a hot, hot bath. You will sweat out toxins, the sugary flat drink will cool your head and settle your stomach.

Water before bed. Two pints. Then a decent lie in, followed by a pint of fresh orange juice and a pint of water. Two paracetamol or aspirin, ideally soluble. OJ to metabolise the rest of the booze, pills for the stretched nerves. Full English. Couple of strong cups of coffee. Then some fresh air. Keep on the pints of water. Failing all else a Barclays and a nap. Then go down the pub for a hair of the dog.

This will take the edge off.
Then as much fresh air as you can manage and plenty of water.

In regards to the night before, in my experience trying to undo my shoe laces is a struggle.
Having several pints of water and various medications is a fantasy.

Greggs cheese and onion pasty, bag of Walker's salt and vinegar, 500ml bottle of full-fat Coke.

............Irn-Bru !

are kill-or-cure remedies that (mostly) work as long as you rehydrate.
The fryup is just comfort eating taken to it's logical extreme. The curry/chilli version is the same but also serves the same purpose as Paracetamol, i.e. gets a sweat on which gets rid of toxins.
Of course having a pint of water before bed saves a lot of next-morning grief, but as mentioned above if you're too pissed to untie your shoes then pre-pit rehydration is just a pipedream and verily suffering is your allotted fate.

Here's another viewpoint.

Louis Jordan & His Tympany Five - "What's The Use Of Getting Sober?"

then back to bed for as long as you can cadge

dehydration and sugar deficiency are ,as i understand it , causes of a hangover

Sleep and fresh air.

Couple of paracetemol. Full english breakfast, followed by....

Knocking one out in the shower afterwards.

Never fails.

If you were on spirits, knock back a double of whatever you were on last night. In one go, as it'll smell and taste brutal if you take your time with it. A doctor friend told me it's like coming down in a controlled fall instead of a crash-landing. And a pint of water to rehydrate.

Not good for problem drinkers, fine for once-in-a-blue-moon types like me.

Except I use ibuprofen (remember not to take ibuprofen on an empty stomach - a couple of biscuits will do, but make sure you have eaten something before taking them).

Don't get out of bed all day.

Pub.

This might not work for everybody.

I've always avoided taking pain killers as I reckon they put more strain on the already overstretched internal organs.
So many of you seem to swear by them; is my theory wrong?

For me, it's as bland & safe as can be: lots of water (though not usually before bed as I'd be too "tired" to manage that), cups of tea a-plenty, a Weetabix &/or a Royal Gala apple which replenishes fluids while settling the stomach.
Then, either keeping busy (if it's not too bad) or monging on the settee all day if it's a nasty bugger.

And do any combination of the Berocca/full fried breakfast/bananas as you feel appropriate. And then go back to bed. When you feel a bit better, feel free to get up: but also, if inclined after a while, go back to bed again. Repeat until recovered. For me, this is much better than the long lie in, but does require logistic and spiritual support from other members of the family, in short supply around here on Saturday mornings.

- don't stop. Just wake up, take the cigarette off my face that I slept on, plump it up and spark it up. Wonder back down the rubadub and order the first pint of the new day.

Now - I don't really drink that much and when I do I don't get hangovers thanks to a regular diet of healthy eating and daily strenuous exercise.

My how I have changed.

For everything except a really heavy session I'd agree with the water and 2 paracetamol idea.

If you've really gone to town on the booze then you effectively need a premed consisting of an antacid along with heavier duty painkillers, which are now available over the counter. Voltarol and Ranitidine work extremely well.

The morning after all the food and drink mentioned works, especially the full english - if you can face it!

(It helps to be near a restaurant for this. A French one).

Glass of champagne (hair of the dog)
Sparkling mineral water
A dozen oysters (it helps if there's an "r" in the month)
Steak Tartare with frites
Double Espresso

Check please!

.. is that I make sure that I have something to eat before I go to bed. I never go out on the lash without having made myself something to come home to. The only constraint is that It must take very little prep when I get home. 10 mins cooking / reheating time is my limit.

Full belly & a glass of milk - fresh as a daisy the next day.

I do think though the amount of sleep obtained is crucial - going home pissed at 2.00am and then getting up at 6.30am is going to mean you are rough whether you have had a glass of water & 2 paracetamol or not, if we are beinmg honest