Entertainment For Lively Minds
Cry havoc and let slip the chavs of war
Writing as someone who believes that he is reasonably au fait with popular music (I mean, I'm a Word reader, goddammit!), I am nonetheless forced to appeal to the wider community of like-minded souls (i.e. those joined by their shared knowledge of the role of the "anal cleft" in Van Morrison's work - it's like a Masonic handshake) to try and identify a style of music that's totally new to me.
I live in a fairly rough part of Gateshead where the youth seem to have adopted the chav lifestyle to the man or (permanently pregnant and/or pissed) woman. Along with the cheap tack'n'bella fuelled random shouting and violence, I've also noticed that they seem to be listening to an especially horrible type of techno. It's just a straight 4/4 happy-hardcore-ish rhythm track with parping synth lines at about 180bpm, but rather than rapping or singing, the vocal track seems to always consist of a British bloke shouting over the top of everything. And it is just shouting - at first I thought it was taken from the desk at a rave, with the MC spurring the punters on by exhorting them to "COME ON!!!" every two bars. But continual exposure has convinced me that someone is actually recording this in a studio: that it's actually meant to sound like this. Lord have mercy.
After my initial thought that this music had been designed with the sole intention of producing the theoretical maximum level of irritation when played on a packed Metro train through a mobile phone, I remembered the sidebar item in The Word about "Free Tekno" and I started to wonder if this shit is the same as that shit. So there's the question: does anybody a) know what I'm talking about, b) know what this music is called and c) know if it's morally OK to kill those perpetrating it?
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The musical tastes of da yoof...
have left my poor brain in a state of extreme confusion for a long time. I will try to answer your questions in order:
(a) I don't know exactly what you're talking about, but your description of that godawful racket was so vivid that I can hear it as clearly as if there some guttertrash was playing it on the bus.
(b) I have no idea what it's called... probably something like "Skrunk" or "Preggersat15beat".
(c) Oh yes. Be my guest.
Typo
...as if some guttertrash was playing it on the bus.
No idea
Haven't a clue what kind of music that is, nor do I want to. However, I have a feeling preggersat15beat played a Peel session in the late 80s.
The Answers
(a) no;
(b) no;
(c) yes of course it is.
Pesky Kids
A couple of years back I fronted a piece for the BBC's Inside Out about 'Chav' culture. One of the more enlightening events was a visit to a youth club in Hendon, Sunderland to an MC's night.
I stood in a tiny room as a DJ mixed tracks and the MC's spat out the lyrics over the top of these very repetitive beats. This music had always been an anathema to me, but standing there, listening and watching it, was thrilling, I just couldn't help but move.
A couple of days later I met up with some teens in Benwell, Newcastle on a freezing cold saturday night. They all had sound files on their mobiles and took it in turns to toast, a couple of them were really good. They had no where to go but to hang out on the table outside the locked activity centre. They were proud of heir patch.
I was reliably informed that it was called New Monkey music.
I've been on buses where someone is playing their mobile really loud, god it's a pain in the arse, but it's not really doing any harm is it, having a laugh, as we all have in our time, surely?
Before I took part in the film I was pretty disdainful of these kids, afterwards, not so much.
If they're being seen as 'guttertrash' I don't think the problem lies with them.
Perhaps...
my use of that term was a little unwise and ill-judged. It was not meant to be taken in all seriousness, although the behaviour of certain elements of the yoof does make me angry and depressed.
"I was reliably informed that it was called New Monkey music."
Are you entirely sure they weren't pulling your leg?
Journalist wanders off, pleased to have discovered the name of a new yoof fad.
Journalist encounters more yoof at another venue, some days later, and enquires about "New Monkey music".
Journalist wakes up in casualty, connected to God knows what equipment, a sweaty young Doc hovering over him holding what look like two large suction pads, and with his chest tingling strangely.
New Monkey?
Is this "New Monkey" music?
Holy Moses
it lives!
The term "music" is going a bit far though.
Your correspondent realises that this comment is just like the one his dad made on the occasion that he first played "In The Court Of The Crimson King" on the parental stereo system, while sewing patches into his jeans with his mum's best needle and thread.
Surely nearly four decades of human progress can't have taken us from Mr Fripp's exhilarating experiments to THIS?
We might as well fire up Skynet, as we've evidently blown it. Let the machines have a go; we're already listening to their tunes.
That was...
an abomination.
about right
yup
No...
...there was/is a club called the Blue Monkey renowned for it's open door policy regarding kids/drugs/techno. They also called it Mechina, and they played lots of 12" imports from Spain and Italy. I did do some research before I took the job on.
Spanish Version
the Spanish version of Chavs listen to this kind of music too. Super fast,some idiot shouting,but then snatchs of melody from songs you wouldn't Believe.
My favourite one is this Billion mph tencho thing that suddenly goes into "End of the world" By Skeeter Davis. I've also heard "Wonderwall,Sweet Dreams: Sweet home Alabama and >Nobody does it better" all sang in English by what seems the same female vocalist.
Stop at any set of traffic lights and you'll see what i mean.
Hmm...
Normally I can't stand this sort of stuff but confess I'm a bit intrigued by the "British bloke shouting" aspect. Especially if he's just shouting, rather than "shouting to the beat". The Spanish version sounds slightly interesting too. What do think the chances are of getting an example of this music on to the next "Now Hear This" CD? It might help break up the mood of tasteful introspection that has prevailed over the recent ones. Or if it turns out to be complete rubbish, it would at least test out the "Clunker" theory discussed on another thread...