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Conforming to stereotype - can anyone beat this?

mojoworking's picture

...and the number one Australian album this (and every other) week is:

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4

Is he

Frank Skinner's Antipodean cousin? The two could even have been separated at birth.

1
donttellhimpike | 2 December 2011 - 11:40am

Or a long lost cousin of...

...Jim Davidson? Either way, it looks like an artefact from the worst aspect of the 70s. Yikes!

0
Colin H | 2 December 2011 - 11:48am

Not quite the 70s Colin

Anyone who has ever queued for tickets at the Shepherd's Bush Empire will have seen this bloke and dozens of his mates knocking back the amber fluid right next door at the Walkabout Bar on Shepherd's Bush Green.

0
mojoworking | 2 December 2011 - 12:38pm

He appears to be drinking a HALF...

What is he, some kind of pooftah?

5
stimpy | 2 December 2011 - 2:45pm

Isn't that

one of those strangely-named Aussie glass sizes like midi or schooner or something?

0
mojoworking | 2 December 2011 - 10:21pm
Beany | 2 December 2011 - 1:01pm

There was a Barry McKenzie album?

What on earth was on it?

I saw the first film but felt it didn't transfer well from the cartoon.

0
stimpy | 2 December 2011 - 2:43pm

Barry Crocker

has had a full and varied career. The front of the LP - Bazza McKenzie's Party Songs - is pictured on this page http://www.barrycrocker.net/discography.htm

The track listing is in the photo I posted, if you squint hard enough 8-}

0
Beany | 2 December 2011 - 6:34pm

From the primary colours to the chessy font to the...

...goofy photo it reminds me of a uniquely Irish phenomenon: the 'country'n'Irish' album. Almost always in cassette format, featuring crappy graphics, a terrible photo of someone standing in a field with an accordion and generally a title like 'Farmer George/Big Dougie/The Singing Brickie (etc) sings 50 irish favourites'. always medleys of dreadful waltz-time schlock, watered down amalgams of conservative American country and maudlin Irish ballads - popular in the 60s/70s and yet to die its death.

Somehow, the country'n'Irish scene and its audience have always resisted bringing out professional looking product - and I'm sure these days the 'designers' who cobble together the CD sleeves for such stuff really have to TRY to get that inept/amateurish 70s packaging look, cos clearly that's what the audience expects... Weird.

5
Colin H | 2 December 2011 - 1:03pm

I know exactly what you mean Colin

It almost seems easier to create halfway decent artwork than the rubbish sleeves these albums get. It's the same in Australia with the local country music releases.

0
mojoworking | 2 December 2011 - 2:36pm

It's fascinating, isn't it?

...if you drive through Sligo or Donegal every other tree by the roadside has a garish, primary coloured poster board advertising some country and irish goon playing in the locale. Some 60s leftovers like 'Big Tom & The Mainliners' (those drug-crazed cowboys of the psychedelic era, with their matching flannels), some 80s sub-Daniel-O'Donnel nearly-men like Declan Nerny, and then a bunch of 16 year-olds with Garth Brooks hats... Every generation seems to sustain this barage of awfulness...

I can't do the picture uploading thing, but - by way of example - you'll find some images of 'Farmer Dan's remarkable ouevre here:

http://www.google.co.uk/images?hl=en&source=hp&q=farmer+dan&gbv=2&oq=far...

For anyone outside or, indeed, inside Ireland, fear not: the advertising phrase 'Ireland's favourite singer!' is, frankly, a lie.

2
Colin H | 2 December 2011 - 3:08pm

oh Gawd...

aye. V Popular in these here parts

He played in a local boozer/dancey place one Wednesday last year. A WEDNESDAY. He was due on stage at 9.30. I'm told you couldn't get in the door after 8, and that there was such a volume of tractors/other agricultural vehicles on the Main St, that the Gardai had a field day checking for out-of-date tax discs.

However, Colin, surely this isn't a genre unheard of up on Norn Iron either is it? Mind you, when it'd be competing with, er,

Maybe it's just us... :)

0
ivan | 2 December 2011 - 3:53pm

Bloody hell...

...'Willie McCrea & His Heartwarming Friends'. That's a chilling thought. 'Vlad the Impaler & his Lovely Entourage' etc.

Willie is, for all non-NI-residents, one of Ian Paisley's political and religious henchmen: except that he also releases albums and videos. Every Christmas, like clockwork. Dinosaurs walk the earth - and they sing 'The Old Rugged Cross' with a country'n'Irish backbeat and a po face.

I obviously can't comment on the widely-spread rumours. Not in print anyway.

2
Colin H | 2 December 2011 - 4:02pm

Are they heartwarming friends

of Dorothy?

1
ianess | 3 December 2011 - 2:33am

For at least 25 years…

For at least 25 years, a stall has appeared at our local weekly market specialising in Country & Irish music. As this is rural North Yorkshire, it's somewhat surprising.

Originally it just sold C&I cassettes, but branched out into other budget titles, VHS videos, DVDs and even computer software, all being fairly rubbish titles that even Woolies (RIP) wouldn't touch.

I've never seen anyone actually buy something from it in all this time.

0
JQW | 2 December 2011 - 4:04pm

in the 80s/90s...

...there was a record distributor in Belfast called Outlet (probably dated back to the 60s). It seemed to specialise in endless cassette compilations of old C&I crap with, literally, cut out old snaps of Margo, Big Tom, Sean Wilson et al pasted over a photo of a rural scehne with terrible font over it ('100 Irish favourites', 'Ireland's favbourite star' etc). Sometimes, I was told, they'd commission new recordings - get a crew of top guys (Van Morrison sidemen, acting anonymously if they needed a quick payday) and churn out albums of the drivel in no time at all for some gormless poltroon ('The Singing Brickie', etc) to croon over.

I was fascinated with how they made money doing this - who WAS buying the stuff? I was told that they did a lot of business supplying 'market traders'. And then I wondered 'Where ARE these markets?'

And now I know: in Yorkshire!

Outlet went out of business a few years back - obviously around the time people stopped buying from the guy down your market, JQ!

0
Colin H | 2 December 2011 - 4:15pm

I did find it strange..

Every time I've been to Ireland, there's been all these posters for Brendan O'Begorrah and his To Be Sure, So It Is boys outside a few of the juicers. I always assumed it was shit laid on for the tourists and tried to find the bars where a bit of interesting twiddly-iddly music is played. Until, one night, by accident, finding myself watching Paddy O'Twinkle and his accordion, playing all your old favourites, I realised that the audience was all local, all dressed up to the absolute nines, all come into town for a drink and a sing on a Friday night.

The interesting twiddly-iddly stuff is the shit laid on for the tourists.

We can't deal with the hard stuff.

1
Lenny Law | 2 December 2011 - 9:26pm

Len, you've nailed it exactly...

...Ireland basically exports trad acts; it KEEPS the crappy, godawful Brendan O'Bloodyhell & his Accordion Boys and their ilk for the locals out in the styx (which is, frankly, 95% of Ireland, north and south).

It's embarrassing but true.

I've been at these country places where all the pot-bellied farmers with their greasy grey quiffs and 70s aftershave and poker faced wives come out in bad suits to ply their basic jive steps of a Saturday night. It's weirdsville. And the only concession to modern life - with this parallel-universe version of too-fast waltz-time Jim Reeves material that has been the bedrock of this movement since the 1750s or thereabouts is the 'backing track'. Yes, one can now hear a sole human being with a fixed grin and an accordion in a rural pub with a pristine backing track of this schmaltz. Or, better yet, a two piece - the second man of which is an unsmiling leprachaun with an inaudible electric guitar, chopping out those silent chords till the world ends or Reeves returns from the grave in which he's been spinning.

Believe me, friends, I have seen these people. And yet lived to tell the tale.

1
Colin H | 3 December 2011 - 12:37am

Ah, away with you, Colin.

You love it really.

"Altogeddher now, ye knows dis one.. One-two-three one-two-three *cough* As oi was goin' over de far-famed Kerry mountains.."

0
Lenny Law | 3 December 2011 - 1:09am

Did they do

'Ghost Riders in the Sky'? Yippee i yay, yippee i yooooo

0
ianess | 3 December 2011 - 2:39am

That would be...

...the equivalent of the furthest shores of progressive rock to these people.

0
Colin H | 3 December 2011 - 11:52am

Closer to home

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4
Beany | 2 December 2011 - 1:04pm

Even closer. With love from Bolton.

All from my record collection x

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3
Beany | 2 December 2011 - 1:07pm

Your record collection

is starting to look as bizarre as mine Beany

0
mojoworking | 2 December 2011 - 2:27pm

I thought is was compulsory

to be accepted into the Massive. It's when you start finding duplicates you realise you have gone too far. Barbara Woodhouse LP anyone?

0
Beany | 2 December 2011 - 6:37pm

Fosters mate

Wonder what he would think about all big 'Aussie' beer brands (eg Fosters) now being foreign owned? Come on Aussies, drink Coopers.

0
mutikonka | 2 December 2011 - 1:57pm

The funny thing is

AFAIK you can't buy Fosters in Australia.

It seems to be an export-only beer targeted at Europe/UK

0
mojoworking | 2 December 2011 - 2:29pm

Hence its well-known advertising line...

..."Fosters: The Beer Even Aussies Can't Drink"

1
Colin H | 2 December 2011 - 2:31pm

It is on sale in Australia

(or at least it was ten years ago), but you do have to make an effort to find any.

0
Brookster | 3 December 2011 - 12:32pm

Possibly, but I've never seen it on general sale

in Australia recently.

Wiki says: While international marketing of the beer often focuses on its Australian connections, Foster's does not enjoy widespread popularity in Australia.

0
mojoworking | 3 December 2011 - 1:16pm

Amateurs the lot of 'em


Compared to the highly engaging tales of this man.

1
RS65 | 2 December 2011 - 3:15pm

Well

The last ones always a good 'un...

I have so many happy memories of my Stoke relatives actually crying laughing listening to Blaster

0
FakeGeordie | 2 December 2011 - 4:01pm

Blimey yes, I'd forgotten Bates.

He was the Ur-Dibnah really.

0
stimpy | 2 December 2011 - 4:04pm

Massive

very big in the Potteries. All the blokes who worked with my old man down the pit seemed to have that Blaster Bates album.
There were 7 or 8 albums released I think. My Uncle couldn't stand him because he was from Crewe.

0
Sour Crout | 2 December 2011 - 10:33pm

It's not a half-pint

it's a schooner, isn't it? Don't know how big a schooner is, mind. And I'm not sure I like the look of what he's drinking anyway. Hardly amber nectar, is it? More like brown Windsor.

0
policybloke1 | 2 December 2011 - 4:04pm

Just looked on Wikipedia and it seems that the volume

of a schooner varies from city to city in Oz - seems to vary between 9 and 15 fl oz. So, I guess it depends where he's drinking :-)

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Australian_beer#Beer_glasses

0
stimpy | 2 December 2011 - 4:09pm

Wherever it is

it's good to see he made the effort to dress for the occasion

Looking at the song titles I'm guessing he's in Sydney. The first track relates to The Hill, a once notorious area of the Sydney Cricket Ground favoured by serious drinkers. It's no longer there but Wiki has this to say about it:

Up until the 1990s the Hill was a grassy slope without seating. It was the 'outer ground' costing the least to get in and attracting working class patronage. The invention of the beer can and the portable cooler in the 1960s increased alcohol consumption at cricket matches which in turn fuelled bad crowd behaviour. In the 1970s the advent of limited overs games held partially at night attracted a different kind of crowd to cricket at the SCG. They were less interested in the subtleties of the game and more in the excitement and spectacle. Brawling and excessive drinking were features of the crowd on the Hill at this time. Even the introduction of individual seating on the Hill failed to completely eradicate crowd misbehaviour. Stricter measures such as banning alcohol were later implemented with greater success

0
mojoworking | 2 December 2011 - 10:45pm

We can hardly accuse the Aussies of not drinking

out of large enough receptacles, when some of them drink...

...Darwin stubbies (pictured left).

0
duco01 | 3 December 2011 - 1:22pm

Hmmm

I can't actually see the picture since my work blocks everything fun from my eyes.

I googled the Aussie album charts and Number 1 is Nickleback. Is that the problem? They are pretty poor.

http://www.ariacharts.com.au/pages/charts_display.asp?chart=1G50

0
Art Vandelay | 2 December 2011 - 4:16pm

That was then…

…this is now.

Australian record stores are simply heaving with tasteful compilation CDs like this:

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0
mojoworking | 3 December 2011 - 12:47am

Let us drive this drivel from our minds...

...with some vintage Oz rock of the highest quality: it's Daddy Cool - 'Come Back Again', 1971:

0
Colin H | 3 December 2011 - 1:00am

Fantastic stuff...

...with the bonus of prompting the Aussie wife to collapse in a puddle of nostalgia on the sofa...Wacky dancing, too!

0
mikethep | 11 December 2011 - 8:51pm
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