33.3% A
33.3% D
33.3% E

100% quality

50% dead.

95% obvious, repetitive and incredibly easy to achieve. 5% genius.

Maybe that one should be in controversial Music Opinions.

30% Dead dad
20% Hipgnosis sleeve art
15% Slow 4/4 plod
12% Live visual effects
9% Identikit guitar solo
8% VCS3
5% Free stickers and posters
1% Nick Mason

50% daft titles
30% daft lyrics
10% Special Brew
7% all the musicians
2% singing ability
1% -ah

40% drums and bass

20% riffs

10% studio wizardry

10% theft

5% freshly-squeezed lemons

5% "guess my religion" loon pants

5% bustles in hedgerows

5% AAAAEEEEAAAA-AAAH!

100% ROCK

made up of:

80% Riffs
20% Sexually suggestive titles & lyrics
12.6742% Mathematical ability

25 % Bert Weedon's "Play in a Day"
25 % The Beatles: 1967-1970 (Guitar Tab Edition)
15 % The Bloke doing the producing
10 % Noel
3-5% Liam (see below)
5-7% Chemical "Distractions"
2 % Drummer / Bassist contribution
2 % Ex-Wives Alimony Considerations
2 % Unresolved Britpop aggravations
2 % Working-Class Hero delusions
1 % Rhyming Dictionary (stolen)
0-6% Self-Awareness (depends upon which one's being interviewed)

50% beards

50% blues

100% twat

40% Interminable, largely pointless, 9 day plod across arid desert. You ask your guide if there are scorpions. He replies: "My friend, this land is too boring for scorpions! Only undeveloped, single-cell organisms dwell in this god-forsaken place."

15% The merciless sun shiiiinning overhead.

20% The head of the expedition breaking off from an argument with his brother regarding what direction they should be travelling in, to inform you that the shimmering mirage on the horizon is the best fucking hotel resort ever.

15% A pile of bleached bones clutching sun-faded copies of albums by The kinks, The Beatles and The Las.

10% A heat-induced sense of deja-vu.

50% flibbedy-dibbedy whimper whimper la-dee-da meep meep

50% plink plink plink plink plink

0% original

100% enjoyable for what they are

33.3% magasine
33.3% podcast
33.3% website

30% Frippery (20% ability / 5% "Temperament"/ 5% JG Bennett "teachings")
20% Intimidated Secondary Musicians
15% Indecipherable Aphorisms
10% Sitting Down
10% Continuous strained denial of term "Progressive"
2% Coffee
2% Audience Consideration
1% Decent Lyrics

75% Sound and 25% Vision

100% R'nB

50% loud
50% QUIET

60% Emerson
30% Lake
9% Palmer
1% Carpet

100%

99% George Michael
1% George Michael

99.99% Things willing to be done in the pursuit of love
0.01% That

50 % Mark E Smith
50 % Your granny on bongos

50% Micky Jones and Deke Leonard

50% custard creams.

60% Taylor
40% Other

50% Morrissey
50% Marr
0% lawnmower parts

33% Ken

20% widdle
20% acoustic whimsy
20% weird lyrics
10% a flower?
10% fox head
10% slipperman
10% stools

30% posturing
30% getting a producer to salvage something from the sessions
20% namechecking cool people
10% Bobby Gillespie attempting to sing
10% posturing

55% miserable
45% bastard

100% genius

90% Genius
10% Perspiration.

30% best guitarist of his generation
20% the other two
10% gladioli
10% limp quiff
10% 'ironic' hearing Id and NHS glasses
10% 'ironic' racism
10% 'ironic' use of iconic 1960s photography

..you do the math...

All 50%
Nothing 50%

83.33% empty chambers
16.66% bullet

25% Smoke
25% Water
25% Fire
25% Sky

definitely 100%

but of what?

50% Guit
50% Steel

Also known as 50% of Dollar.

46% Wife/girlfriend/significant other left me
37% Booze
3% Dog/family pet died
6% Guitars
5% Honky tonks
3% Pick up trucks

25% Lydon
25% McLaren
20% Matlock
10% Jones
10% Cook
5% Vicious
5% Bill Grundy

30% Uh
20% Ow
20% Taking it to the bridge
30% of your concert fee in fines

37% Hip swivelling
12% Fried banana sandwiches
36% Gold plated Cadillacs
7% Time spent on the toilet
8% Time spent leaving the building

20% rock n' roll poetry
20% two-fingered guitar riffs
20% perambulation in duck stylee
20% parsimony
20% spying on women in toilets

20% good schools
16% Grandad shirts
10% banjos
20% trust funds to fall back on should this not work out as Daddy warned
34% dewy eyed idea of what it's like to be poor

25% - Yeah, Yeah, yeah
25% - Beep, beep, beep, beep, yeah
25% -Jude, Jude, Judey, Judey, Judey, Judey, yeah
25% - Ooh, cookie, choo

85.7% - Days Liked
14.3% - Days Not Liked

40% fire
40% brimstone
20% being at a loss to explain why the Four Horsemen still aren't visible on the horizon yet.

100% proof. Probably.

110% Volume.

50% Angus and Malcolm
25% Bon Scott
10% Brian Johnson and his cloth cap
5% The rhythm section, Phil and Cliff
5% Chuck Berry and BB King inspiration
2.5% Bells, cannons, devils horns, blow-up women, stiff upper lips, runaway trains, & Marshall amplifiers.
2.5% school outfit.

80% doable

60% Fringe
40% Shaved

20% Satan
20% The Son of Satan
20% Satan's assorted relatives, employees and well-wishers
20% Satan's place of residence
20% Women who will never fathom the Stygian depths of Glenn Danzig's tormented soul

1% The Carpenters
100% Sly Fox

20% Becker
20% Fagen
20% Gary Katz
10% Skunk's droopy 'tache
10% David Palmer's live tambourine playing
10% Persistence in selecting guitarists for the solos
10% Having a guitar player called 'Drew Zingg'

50% Fairlight
30% overdubs
10% big glasses
5% kitchen sink
5% original recording artist

50% they took my daddy from me
50% tortured artist
5% no education

100% Lennon
0% Julian

75% Joy Division

50% past glories
50% self parody

110% effort

Sex: 33.3%
Drugs: 33.3%
Rock 'n' Roll: 33.3%

... Shirley Bassey
Walker Brothers
Midge Ure

0% regrets.

Frank Sinatra - 2% (too few to mention)

Love of rock - 50%
Love of roll - 50%

Not 'arf!

Dr. Feelgood

25% John
25% John
25% John
25% John

Likelihood of getting what you want: probably no more than 80%

Likelihood of getting what you need: potentially 100%, assuming you try sometimes

Day 100%
Night 100%

Stay: 50%
Go: 50%

50% Common element
50% Good bowling

(Importance of striped Lycra trousers not calculated)

0% - Go
100% - Stay

10% - Famous for six months
10% - Grolsch bottle tops
10% - Ken
10% - Lorraine Kelly 'Oh you're in Vegas now' interviews every three years
60% - Obscurity

0%

33% - Men returning
33% - Whack for my daddy, oh
33% - Probably somewhere near the jail
1% - Wanting to put some Irish in her

Dancing - 0%
Action - 0%
Desire to go to Chelsea - 0%

100% dead - Jimi Hendrix Experience

100% alive - Cream

Days You Eat the Bear - 50%
Days the Bear Eats You - 50%

100% naturally occurring solid aggregate of minerals and/or mineraloids.

Distance travelled en route to Paradise - 50%

% of which resemble Bob Todd 99
% of which resemble anyone else 1

The secret of their success:

Rum - 33.3%
Sodomy - 33.3%
The Lash - 33.3%
Front teeth - 0%

Pumping piano - 50%
Rock & roll longevity 20%
Good ol' boy/redneck factor 10%
Wives who were also his 13 year-old cousin - 10%
Other wives who died in mysterious circumstances - 10%

25% = 0%

Paradise 50%

Things that compare to you: 0%

Richard 33%

25% Police
25% Thieves
50% to The Clash for the royalties. YEAH MAN!

50% Man
50% Biscuit.

100% spunk, apparently

45% Mary
40% Mungo
15% Midge.

Value = 5%
Effort =0%

33.33% recurring Jesus, 66.66% gingers

33.3% You find someone to love
33.3% she falls in love with you
33.3% You kiss and hold her tightly

= 100% heaven

Milli Vanilli: 0%
Session singers: 100%

Lady Gagas 'Born This Way'

33.3% - Gay
33.3% - Staight
33.3% - Bi
0.1% - Unsure

50% - Madonnas 'Express Yourself'
50% - Madonnas 'Vogue'

Their only UK No.1

100%
99%
98%
97%
96%
95%
etc

33.33% Ear...oh all pretty self-evident I guess

Songs = 1%
Roland Chorus Delay Pedal = 99%

20% Da-Dang Da-Dang
20% Ch-Ch-Chug Ch-Ch-Chug Ch-Ch-Chug
20% Love needed
20% Fooling needed
20% Oh!

0% things she has.

99.6%

Effort 110%
Approval by Simon Cowell 1,000,000%
Contribution to music 0%
Understanding of mathematics 0%

Red heads - 66.6%
Brunette - 33.3%

or

Structured songs - 15%
Improvisation - 85%

errr...you do the maths!

Proclaimers 100%
Breeders 50%
Thompson Twins 0%

Bruce Springsteen

Perspiration - 90%
Inspiration - 10%

1000%

33.333333% Red Stuff
33.333333% Perspiration
33.333333% Drops

60% Freekspert, 75% Sukmunki, 100% Das Chip Shop

mean weekly love overspill: 14.285%

Ali Campbell of UB40: Numberically listed at 10%, despite his somewhat paradoxical 0% existence rating.

Eddie Tenpole expressed as unit of swordpower: 0.1%

Contributing artists to Band Aid USA as percentage of world population: 100%

Femininity of Lionel Richie love interest: 300%

Current masculinity rating of Paul McCartney relative to reading given just 24 hours earlier: <50%

Of six unidentified items, the following allocation was identified by both: a) Carl Perkins; and b) Elvis Presley as one which was seen as a suitable alternative to the defacement of brightly coloured male footware:

For the money: 16.66r% (1 unit)
For the show: 33.33r% (2 units)
To assist in the process of getting ready: 50% (3 units)

XXV%

99% obscure
1% sleep

25% football hooligans
49% mdma
11% audrey
10% pony tail
10% humor

according to John Lennon

Oxygen: 0%
Food: 0%
Water: 0%
Education: 0%
Love: 100%
Mastercard: 0%
Religion: 0%
Drugs: 0%

100% No

20% Gentle
80% Giant

33% P
33% F
33% M
1% Cornetto

1% Repetition
1% Repetition
1% Repetition
1% Repetition
.
.
.
x95
.
.
.
1% Repetition

100%
101%
102%
103%
104%... etc.

100 % over.

46.16% Dead
58.84% Alive and, presumably, grateful

The member called Ben Folds - 33.3%
The supposedly four members not called Ben Folds - 66.6%

100% lies.

50% Buildings
50% Food

95% 70's
1% 80's
2% 90's
2% 00's

50% Doolin'
50% Dalton

10% Teardrop Explodes
80% Megaliths
10% German hat

Rick Astley pie-chart:

Everything = 100%
Girl = 0%

1/3 = bad
2/3 = not bad

1.887% Ace of Spades
98.113% rest of deck (not forgetting the joker)

who'd feel a bit left out if I popped round to visit.

83.33333% not blond

20% fire, 20% ice, 20% luke warm water, 20% Viv Savage, 1.666% John "Stumpy" Pepys , 1.666% Eric Childs, 1.666% Peter "James" Bond, 1.666% Mick Shrimpton,1.666% Ric Shrimpton, 1.666% a drummer who had been accidentally packed with the band's equipment and never seen again, 10% other unnamed drummers.