Entertainment For Lively Minds
Annoyances with TV drama
It was a quiet Sunday. We'd been out for a nice Sunday lunch (Jolly Sailors Inn nr Moorsholm in N Yorks, on A171 to Whitby, if anyone's in the vicinity) and after popping into my parents' house happened to spy Inspector George Gently starting on the TV. So, down I sat with a cuppa and thought I'd have a few minutes of cosy Sunday night viewing...
Within 3 three seconds of the show starting (yes, literally three seconds) I was chewing the cup. The very first scene faded in with the caption "Teeside, 1966". Not a great start. I wonder where exactly one might find the River Tee, I thought to myself. But then two young hooligans break into a special school. As soon as they opened their mouth I wanted to scream: they were from the BBC central casting for "young Geordie lads". They sounded like they should've been on Geordie Shore.
Calling someone from Teesside (see, 2 s's) a Geordie is like calling someone from Bedford a Cockney. So hearing this linguistic bollock dropped so quickly made me wonder just about quality a bit. Someone had clealry spent a lot of time trying to get period stuff right, like the cars and the interior props right, but had completely forgotten toget such basic things like place names and the way people speak. It was really,really, really annoying. It just felt so half-arsed and lazy to me - it doesn't take much effort to check, after all.
So that's my little bugbear for the weekend. Are there similar kinds of things that bug you about other TV dramas (like the ethnographic profile or murder rate in Midsomer that would get a chief constable fired, for example)?
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Plenty
But I have to let it wash over me or I'd go mental.
Biggest bugbear: poor research of music. If it's May 1982, you won't be hearing Leave in Silence by Depeche Mode on the radio. These things MATTER.
Oh yes
Heartbeat was awful for that, not to mention the bloody thing ran for longer than the actual 60's
George Gently trailer does this as well
Series set in the sixties, music is Time for Action by Secret Affair
Well...
The last series of George Gently had hippies in rural Northumberland in 1966, so they obviously aren't going a bundle on historical accuracy.
Heartbeat
They played Depeche Mode on Heartbeat? Wow, that's seriously shit research.
I saw an advert for some kind of...
Sounds of the Sixties-type programme on a satellite channel the other day. As a background it used a collage of acts from the time, amongst which was a photo of Jimmy Page wearing his dragon suit in 1975. This shouldn't annoy me but it does.
No
It should annoy us, because it's part of the weirdness of supposedly postmodern culture that mashes everything up into one amorphous blob without stopping to consider that there were reasons why things were different at different times.
That's what popular consumerist culture is becoming, something that happens in a vast array of hues and sorts, then all gets shat back out "for our convenience", by people who don't understand those bits, as a single mushed up mess.
For some reason, I keep thinking of the last verse of the song, "There's Some Things That The Grown Ups Just Won't Tell You" by Mike Harding:
Weird Computers
You know, a character will say something like "we just need to guess his password" and then we'll see a shot of a computer screen, and instead of it running Windows or Mac it seems to be running some strange operating system with a black screen and white letters. Maybe it's an obscure version Linux or something.
And...
...despite supposedly being the king of geeks, they still haven't turned off the tiny bleepy noises that happen every time the screen does anything at all.
All things can be drawn as a 3D wireframe map. Which must be shown as a visual aid. Going BLEEP. In case you've forgotten to look at it.
GAAAH.
[This rant has been brought to you care of too much 24 and the last 2 series of Spooks.]
Instant information
I always laugh when someone like Jack Bauer is chasing a baddie and without pausing says to Chloe "I'm on the north side of x building" without spending ages looking at the sun and working it out, like I would (I'm still not entirely sure which way my house faces!). And whilst I can just about believe that super spies might know these things it all comes crashing down when Chloe, without skipping a beat, immediately has the plans to whatever building he is in and tells him where the nearest secret passage is.
The other thing is the one punch knockout that the likes of Jack Bauer can inflict on anyone who's not essential to the scene, when their real reaction would be more likely to stand there holding their chin saying 'ow!'. And yet when they are up against a more important henchman they can seemingly take beatings that Superman would struggle to get up from.
I actually swore that I'd never watch another action film after watching Mission Impossible 2, and particularly the fight scene where, amongst other kicks and punches, Tom Cruise, down on his knees, takes a full blooded kick in the face from Dougray Scott (or it may have been the other way round) only to have his full wits about him and be able to roll out of the way to avoid the next punch a second or two later, without even a shake of the head.
And why do bosses never trust the hero, when they are repeatedly saving their life/a bus full of school children/the world?
I heard a neurologist
(Steven Novella, for Skeptics' Guide to the Universe listeners) remark that contrary to how they typically behave on film, anyone who was knocked unconscious for more than just a couple of seconds would almost certainly be suffering signficant brain damage and thus highly unlikely to get up, rub their bonce and carry on as normal.
I was out for about 20 mins....
when I was a kid, after I pulled a wheelie on my bike (going downhill) and my front wheel fell out, head/pavement interaction ensued and I don't remember a thing. Didn't affect me though ..............................ARSE BISCUITS
Action films - all those wasted bullets!!
During my teens I briefly attended a rifle club. After a short lesson in how to hold the weapon and responsible behaviour we were allowed to fire at targets (Threepence a bullet I seem to remember). I consistently scored between 80 and 90 out of 100 but was considered a very very average marksman. The best ones always scored 95+.
Now in action films nobody (especially the baddies shooting at the hero) seems capable of hitting a barn door!
Threepence a bullet!!
No wonder these films are so bloody expensive to make.
Footnote - My time as a gun-toting teenager was very short-lived and I have never shot at or had the desire to shoot at anything living.
Chris Rock
would seem to agree
Same programme....
Set in 1966 - aimed at the "Heartbeat" market, so use of the popular music du jour is a key attraction to the demographic.
Guess which piece of period music Auntie was using to plug George Gently last week?
Secret Affair's Time for Action. Hmm. Do the Beeb still employ researchers?
edit - just seen above... D'oh...must read whole thread before barging in....
You must have driven past the end of our road....
... but you didn't call. I'd laid biscuits out on a plate and everything.
There's plenty of sign writers here on Teesside who forget that second 's'. Then again when the name of the town Middlesbrough is spelt that way because of a mis-spelling on official documents in the 19th Century (or so I'm told) I guess we should embrace 'Teeside' as part of a local tradition of word-based ignorance.
Thanks for the tip on the Jolly Sailors - will try there very soon.
I hate when they have a
70s programme and the house is decked out in 70s furniture. Well I grew up in the 70s and our furniture included a radiogram. We didn't have anything identifiably 70s ( apart from the wallpaper ) til the 80s.
Agreed
In Poirot unless they live in the 'big house' all the houses seem to be art deco 1920s with furniture to match, surely there must have been houses from an earlier period that people lived in?
Schools rugby KOs
As a rather waif-like scrum half playing behind an inenpt pack I got knocked out 3 times in one month - I was clearly doing something wrong. After the 3rd one the A&E department told me I had to stop playing for a couple of months, and that I shouldn't have been playing after the first one at all.
Unfortunately our games teacher thought 'duty of care' was a tax on spirits.
As much as it might pain us.....
.....the average Joe in Britain in 2011 knows absolutely didley squat about, say, The Beatles.
The BBC know this and I suspect that the average Joe at the BBC also knows diddley squat about, say, The Beatles.
I've used them as an example but you can replace that group with any other group or any musical genre of the last 55 years.
And it's everyone from 'The Only Way Is Essex' through to 'University Challenge'.
Downloading data
It's my own fault for watching Spooks, but I really have lost count of the number of times I've seen someone bust into an office to download data from a baddie's computer... we see the dialog box going "Downloading..." and the phoney tension as they JUST get it onto the stick before the naughty person gets back from having a fag/slash/meeting with someone from the FSB/CIA/NME.
And they had the brass neck to use it in the first episode of the new series - perhaps as it's the last and they're giving us a tour d'horizon of their greatest hits.
Harrrrrrumph!