Steeleye Span's 'All Around My Hat' w\o hearing Paul whitehouse

...(Your Kn*b Keeps Lifting Me) Higher and Higher

Knob, knob will tear us apart,again.
OR
Let the arseache begin.
Could they be related, perchance?

Kn*b Hurts

Something's Gotten Hold of my Ar*e

ooh - ooh-
howsabout:
A Good Arse (these days is hard to find)
or
Knobbing You (is easy cos you're beautiful)

Kn*b me kn*b my dog by Pete Shelley (the other one)

Arse of Glass by Blondie?
The worrying "My Arse belongs to Daddy" by Ertha Kitt?
"Hairless Arse" by Genesis?
Anything by "Arse"
"I Knob my Dog" by Cat Stevens.

I'll stop now...

PJ Harvey

She knobs you - by the Beatles

Up The Arse Backwards
Chant of the Ever Circling Skeletal Knob

Isn't she knobbly? (Stevie Wonder)
My knob has gone (Josh Rouse)

I really shouldn't ...

Knobstain (Jose Gonzales)

but so gigglesome:

My Arse Will Go On
Destroy the Arse
I Left My Arse In San Francisco
Young Arses Run Free

Kn*b And Only Kn*b (Neil Young, honest!)
Kn*b is All Around
Kn*b Is A Battlefield

And the double whammy - Kn*b Letters (Straight To Your Arse) -hmmmm...

I'm going to have a wash now - I feel dirty..

that just my arse talking - Ron Sexsmith
i've only a Wooden arse - maybe that's what did for The King
Somebody to Knob - Queen
Your Knob Is King - Sade
Knob Hangover - Diana Ross

..whenever Paul Hewston blogs, do your eyes miss the T? Come on out, Bonio, we all know it's you with the filthy mind. Pride in the name of knob? My heart it is!

...with all your pop and soul music. Prog-knob is where it's at. Expand your girth with:

The Dark Side Of The Knob
Tales From Knob-o-graphic Oceans
The Lamb Lies Down On Knob-way
Knob Salad Surgery
Aqua-knob

and of course:

In The Court Of The Crimson Knob

Arse of Glass
Arse of Gold
Arse-ache Tonight
Arse-breaker
Knob for Sale
Knob Me Two Times (Then Go Away)
Knob Her Madly
Knob to Burn
Knob is a Good Thing

Roadrunner by Jonathan Richman and the Modern Knobbers

/oh dear

//also
You Make Knobbing Fun
Radar Knob
Whole Lotta Knob
All My Knob
Dedicated to the One I Knob

//stops//

My Knob Is Like A Red Red Rose (trad)

The knob that knobs the knob that knobs to knob the knob that knobs...

Spiritualized "Gonna have a broken arse..."
Super Furry Animals "I've got a fire in my arse for you..."

Irish blood, English arse (Morrissey)
Now my arse is full (Morrissey)
Why does my arse feel so bad? (Moby)
Harvester of arses (Rufus Wainwright)
How can you mend a broken arse? (Al Green)
I want to be the boy to warm your mother's arse (White Stripes)
I wish I had a wooden arse (that I could set on fire) (David Holmes & The Free Association)
Take another little piece of my arse (Dusty Springfield)
Unchain my arse (Ray Charles)
I'm going to stop pretending that I didn't break your arse (Eels)

And my personal favourite, the old classic:

Arse like a wheel

Animal knobber - Suede
The bookknobbers - The Divine Comedy
Bizarre knob triangle - New Order
Everlasting knob - Knob Affair
Everybody needs somebody to knob - Blues Brothers
Get ready for knob - Nick Cave
Hate this and I'll knob you - Muse
How I learned to knob the bootboys - The Auteurs
I knob you, what are you? - Gene
I never knobbed a man (the way I knob you) - Aretha Franklin
I was made to knob her - Stevie Wonder
I wish I could have knobbed you more - Candie Payne
If you could knob me - Edwyn Collins
It's true that we knob one another - The White Stripes
Kissing my knob - Bill Withers
K.N.O.B. knob - Al Green
Let your knob decide - Aztec Camera
Knob her ("knob her for me...") - The Walker Brothers
Knob like a fountain - Ian Brown
Knob me, knob me now - Curtis Mayfield
Knob meeting knob - Level 42
The same knob that made me laugh - Bill Withers
That's how strong my knob is - Otis Redding
Touch me with your knob - Beth Orton
Why won't you give me your knob? - The Zutons
Will you still knob me tomorrow? - The Shirelles
You're nobody 'til somebody knobs you - Dean Martin
You've got to hide your knob away - The Beatles
The knob of Richard Nixon - Manic Street Preachers

But Morrissey is clearly the knob king:

Nobody knobs us - Morrissey
The youngest was the most knobbed - Morrissey
Last night I dreamed that somebody knobbed me - The Smiths

someone wrote in and pointed out how funny the Fight Club rules are if you replace the word fight with wank.

1st RULE: You do not talk about WANK CLUB.

2nd RULE: You DO NOT talk about WANK CLUB.

3rd RULE: If someone says "stop" or goes limp, taps out the wank is over.

4th RULE: Only two guys to a wank.

5th RULE: One wank at a time.

6th RULE: No shirts, no shoes.

7th RULE: Wanks will go on as long as they have to.

8th RULE: If this is your first night at WANK CLUB, you HAVE to wank.

There ain't no knob in the arse of the city

Bonnie Tyler-Total Eclipse of the Arse

My knob is like a red,red rose

Warren Zevon