Entertainment For Lively Minds
40 Most Irritating Noises in Pop
Posted by Mousey on 28 September 2011 - 10:02am.
Here's mine.
It occurs at about 47secs into the intro - Mark Knopfler going "woo-hoo" in a silly falsetto.
It sounds like my Aunty popping through the front door for morning tea. "Hello dear!!"
Fair drives me nuts. I used to work in an appalling club band that did this song and sure enough the singer stuck in this annoying little piece of vocalese every time.
Anyway that's my contribution.
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This song by itself possibly has 40 annoying things alone.
I'll stick to autotune though... Just blooming hateful.
(Yes it's satan's personal band The Black Eyed Peas again...)
Is That
the worst record ever made?
It's all the rage
Take the chorus of a reasonable tune - preferably an old one, like J-Lo "reimagining" the Lambada - and then, instead of the verse, cut to some rapper doing something Dead Urban and Aggressive® but musically far less interesting. If the transition between the two styles is jarring and annoying, all the better.
This one's a classic of the genre, I think - a waste of both Rihanna and Eminem, neither of whom at this stage of the game should have needed the other to completely mess up their half-finished records.
No
It is undoubtedly a trough-load of shite, but have you heard Swagger Jagger by Cher Lloyd? It makes the BEP tune sound like Beethoven in comparison.
What comes immediately to mind to me are...
1. the snare drum sound on virtually all 80s records (Simple Minds being prime culprits)
2. Jim Kerr going 'Wow-ow! Wow-ow!' on virtually all Simple Minds 80s records
3. Fretless bass on 80s records (Paul Young records being the Napoleon's of this crime)
4. Keyboard sounds on 80s records
5. the 'Chapman stick' on every record it's ever been on
6. 'Bagpipe guitars'
No 1 and No 4
well represented on "Walk Of Life" in OP.
That whole track is just...
...awful old nonsense to my ears, Mouse.
Chapman Stick
I have to say I had never heard of this instrument before. I looked it up and it is a bit awful. I also checked it on Wiki and I am not familiar with the work of any of the listed players. But, nice bit of knowledge thanks!
Glad to have you on board, Jorro!
....we periodically have the 'Chapman Stick discussion' around here and it can always be paraphrased to two lines:
'The Chapman Stick - it's a bunch of crap'
'Yes, but surely we can make an exception for that guy in King Crimson?'
Answer A,
please!
in his defence
Colin, you are entitled to your opinion of the instrument, but a little more than faint praise is due to Tony Levin, who has not only played with King Crimson but also extensively with Paul Simon and Peter Gabriel. In each case he has made a distinctive contribution to their sound by use of the Chapman Stick.
The snare drum
vs the synth drum.
I hate the latter more, with its bbooo, bbooo sound.
The guilty item...
The 80s decade of The Devil
I agree with all that, specially the snare drum sound Plus
• The all treble no bass production sound of 80's records.
• The general relaxed, laid back attempt at light entertainment and 'relaxation music' sound created on 80's records.
• 80's Records. And all their implied values and the values of their offspring.
I take it
you've not heard Swans then...
Swans - who are they ?
Please don't post a Youtube clip. I have a feeling its some bloke from Sheffield with a mullet, desperately trying to sound "sophisticated"?
Oh no research has confirmed it was in fact an 80's NY "post punk" outfit desperately trying to sound "original". But with zero musical talent. Fair enough though.
"But with zero musical talent"
That's a stunning critical analysis, considering you've never heard of them, never mind their music.
Ah but I have now see
...via Spotify and Youtube. And it's not a phrase I would use lightly. Oh no. My carefully chosen phrase was carefully considered, went through many painstaking draughts and revisions... "Zero musical talent" was the stunning result.
Drumming
of the click track variety
so you object
to drummers playing in time? Or is it drum machines you dislike? I'm with you on that, much of the time
Bit of both really
some of my favourite tracks have the drummer losing it a bit and then making a come back.
Wobble Board, possibly
I bought The Psychedelic Sounds of The 13th Floor Elevators a few years back, on the strength of celebrity endorsement (Julian Cope, what greater celebrity is there?) and a general music mag hubbub of approval.
Just about every track is accompanied by what sounds like a slightly accelerated Rolf Harris on wobble board. I have no idea what it really is, but it's so incongruous and just bloody everywhere. It makes the whole collection unlistenable to me, but I can't imagine what music fan would not be irritated by it. Is it recorded on a frequency that only I can hear? It's weird that for such a distinctive sound, no-one ever even mentions it.
It's an electric jug
From http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/13th_Floor_Elevators
Enlightenment appreciated
An electric jug. I should have realised.
So intrigued..
I had to check them out. The jug player is obviously a non-musician and fond of his up-front sound, the other guys in the band are possibly too stoned to object. Yes, it's all over most of their stuff.
But here's one with "not so much spam in it" (or none)with a pleasant video
Tommy Hall
Wow. I love that stupid sound. It's unique, unexpected, and weirdly trippy. I'm glad it wasn't inspirational, though - it's a trademark© sound. And a plug here for his extraordinary lyrics. Anyone else tried to learn Slip Inside This House?
37) Woo - Yeah
On mostly 80's pop rap
It's like there's a party in my ears and everyone is syphilitic.
Shout
The hairs on the back of my neck stand up whenever I hear the "We..e..e..e..e..e..e..e..e..ll!" bit at the beginning of Shout by Lulu, and not in a good way.
Strongly agree...
... but when Otis Day of Otis Day & the Knights does it in Animal House, that's absolutely rock and roll.
"Wait 'till Otis sees us! He LOVES us!"
The sound of over-singing/over-emoting.
Just fucking sing the words, alright? Don't try and put anything of "yourself" into the song. Just use the pipes you were born with. No tricks. No scooping up to the note. No vibrato beyond what naturally occurs (we can tell). And don't emote. For fuck's sake, don't emote.
Oversinging is just THE worst thing in pop music, from melismatic shitwarblers like Carey to "gosh, did I mention I can do vibrato" rocktwats like Matt Bellamy and all points in between.
Don't force it. Just sing the fucking song.
Matt Bellamy
Always sounds as if he's driving across a succession of cattle-grids with heavy weights tied to his knackers.
Steve Harley and Louise Wener
Incredibly annoying and affected vocal "hiccup".
No need. Adds nothing to the song.
Nobody...
...made valid use of 'the hiccup' as a pleasing addition to the vocalist's armoury. I suppose some may say we should make an exception for Buddy Holly but... no. And certainly not Adam Faith.
Alma Cogan, perhaps - but hers was more a laugh than a hiccup. And she was likeable. Nothing I've ever learned about Steve Harley leads me to a similar conclusion.
Just finished reading this last night:
http://www.amazon.co.uk/Alma-Cogan-Gordon-Burn/dp/0571222846
Compelling and a little bit disturbing. A hell of a book.
Yes,
I concur. He's a great writer, but as you say, his style and choice of subject matter are rather disturbing, as evidenced further in 'Fullalove'. I haven't dared to read his factional take on the West murders...
Might give that one a miss!
I've read Martin Amis's memoir which was chilling and moving enough. Actually it's the only book of his I've really enjoyed - if enjoyed is the right word.
The worst offender
Has to be Dolores 'Cranberry' O'Riordan. Lord how I loathe her and her hiccup. And her bombs and her bombs and her bombs and her bombs...
As awful as Dolorous O'Cranberry is...
...and she really is, I've heard worse. The worst offenders are often, thankfully, amateurs, who presumably must think it makes them sound more "pro" or "proper". It doesn't. And it's a shame: I've heard some voices that would be quite nice but for the inches of vocal pancake makeup trowelled onto them. Oh, the number of times I've seen pub bands and had to just go and drink to take away the pain of hearing someone "putting their all" into a cover of that Goo Goo Dolls song people seem unaccountably to like. JUST STOP IT! STOP IT!
I remember Thom Yorke once saying that, ever since The Bends, he deliberately does vocal takes absolutely off-the-cuff and deadpan. He just sings the words, then fucks off and has a cuppa. That's how they did Street Spirit, IIRC, and for my money that's one of the most beautiful, natural vocals I've ever heard. So sweetly sung, and with nothing forced onto it whatsoever. Pure.
(Full disclosure: I'm really not a terrific singer myself. I don't claim any expertise. I just know what I like etc etc etc)
Chrisse Hynde
has got away with the hiccup and the vibrato on a number of records - usually early stuff. However some of the hic-infested songs on Rip up the Concrete made me wanna stuff my lugs with pate do fois gra.
Melismatic Shitwarblers
there. Two more from them later.
God,
I hope not.
Big Yellow Taxi.
The dreadful, dreadful fake laugh at the end. Most of the noises Joni M makes, including her singing, get on my tits but The Laugh veritably purloins the Peak Freans.
More fake laughing pains in the arse
Completely agree Joni Mitchell should have been melted into glue for that fake laugh. Here's another fake laughing pain in the arse.
From 3.45 to 4.00 not one but two fake laughs!!! Thank god Bobby Brown got her onto crack or there could have been more of this shit falling out her arse and into the charts. YOU'VE SANG IT40 TIMES BY THIS POINT, STOP PRETENDING TO LAUGH AND GET BACK ON THE PIPE
should have been melted into glue for that fake laugh
or even for resembling a horse
This is what I was on about earlier
See post below somewhere
And another annoying thing about Big Yellow Taxi...
...is that silly low register line she sings near the end (if I remember correctly). Okay, you can just about impersonate a man's vocal register as well as doing the high stuff, but it doesn't mean you have to do it.
Curiously
I find everything by Joni to be an annoying noise...except for 'Big Yellow Taxi'- which I've always rather liked. She lost me with the thirty eight albums of interminable pseudo-jazz wailing that followed.
To be honest...
...I'm not much of a fan either. I feel I should be, but it's hard work...
That sort of little growl
that Britney Spears does on Hit Me Baby before she sings the first owwww baby baby.
Much imitated, and beloved of X Factor contestants...
Bloody ridiculous noise
Has always put me in mind of Victoria Wood's Cacharel routine.
Robbie Williams
being cheeky.
Or honking out the words to a song in his no-range baritone, just about keeping within a broad span of flats and sharps.
Or bellowing out 'I'm rich beyond my wildest dreams!'
Disco ...
... consists mostly of irritating sounds. Bass, percussion, vocals, keyboards, string section, production, hairstyles ... it's like a catalogue of irritants.
But that flat, limp, pencil-on-cardboard "drum" sound in rap and hip-hop? "Phat" beats, my arse. Almost as irritating as the in-your-face deal-with-it rant it accompanies.
"in-your-face deal-with-it rant"
...I'm afraid that accounts for pretty much all hip hop and rap to my ears. And so, as it would be if I met a whiney, hectoring irritant in the street, I walk the other way.
That god-awful 'nnnngggg-' sound
that comes at the beginning of every line of post-Carey female singing to indicate that the performer is emoting.
Very obvious in this total travesty:
and can I apologise to all who listen to this in advance...
Useless
and pointless cover versions. That's got to be in the top 40 most irritating sounds.
Pointless Kate Bush covers?
You need the master himself;
Where's the spoiler alert?
As in - will spoil this wonderful song for ever.
That's it! That's it!
That's kind of what I was reaching for with my Britney post earlier bit I couldn't quite think how to describe it. The 'nnngggg'! Perfectly illustrated by this video. I believe Autotune may well be at large as well, and note also the use of unnecessary warble.
Danni Green
Autotuned tae Fuck! and those keyboards stabs, Jeez.
there's nothing right with that video
What a
fuc*ing hidious sound!!!
Lead guitar as punctuation
Not really a sound, but somehow it always sounds the same.
Those moments in song where people sing about playing guitar and then...do.
Thunder Road is the obvious example, but it's not the only culprit. Hate it, hate it, hate it.
In fact, I feel so bad about posting that abortion
that I must post this just to demonstrate how completely unnecessary it is:
Is that from stars in their eyes?
It has that round of applause when they recognise the first line.
"Yo" and
"bitch." Learn some manners, please.
Objections
The fuzz bass on 'Think For Yourself'.
Just no.
Not the song
itself, though it is annoying, but the sound that is 11 seconds into it:
Damn near ubiquitous at one point. Now not, thank [insert deity here]
(q.v. this post in the current thread)
Ah yeah!
That is annoying isn't it?
Yeh, yeh
It rather sounds like they sampled Derek Guyler from the Churchill insurance ads. Which wouldn't necessarily have been such a bad idea, I say.
I thought this might have
I thought this might have been the "Hoo! Hay!" which was everywhere in the early-90s. I have a real fondness for piano house from my childhood but I hate that sound.
First heard on DJ Fast Eddie's
Yo Yo Get Funky from 1988?
Lyn Collins - Think (About It)
first started to appear as a loop sample in 1988. The original record is great, so it's like reverse alchemy.
Starman
That little "oh oh oh" noise Bowie makes at the beginning of "Starman" over the opening guitar chords. I remember seeing it on TOTP, and right after it he does this little smug smile as if to say "at LAST I'm on TOTP. I knew from that point on that we weren't going to get on, though I bought the single and the next few albums.
Whitney Houston
One moment in particular. There's a bit in "I wanna dance with somebody" towards the end, just before the chorus ad nauseam where she does a "woo!" followed by a 'yeah!" that really grates.
And the OP is spot on about "Walk of Life". Surely the worst moment of their worst recording.
When I was at college
I was, erm, "persuaded" ("bullied" is such an ugly word, isn't it) into recording the demo tape for a fellow student who was applying to go on "Stars In Their Eyes." She was truly convinced that she was "just like Whitney Houston, only better."
She had to submit three songs, of which this was the first. The problem was that she had no voice to speak of - as she proved at the college Christmas concert where the pianist had to keep his foot on the soft pedal of the unmiked piano and play very lightly as she couldn't be amplified (bloody miked up at that) adequately without getting feedback.
The "WHOO!" was the loudest she got, and it alone was incredibly loud. We got distortion on the first take. My abilities to operate a single mike channel were called into question.
She later blamed everybody but herself for her rejection. Her wavering out-of-key was, supposedly, caused by my having stretched the tape. Nevertheless, she resubmitted the same tape several times until, eventually, Granada wrote to politely point out that they would never allow a white person to black up on one of their programmes.
I wish I had one of her publicity stills (professionally shot, paid for by her my-little-cherub-can-do-no-wrong mother.) It was like propaganda for the Ku Klux Klan. Stick a banjo and a watermelon in her hands and the effect would have been complete. Christ alone knows what the photographer thought.
I'd have felt sorry for her, but her ego knew no bounds. So sod her. I still have a copy of the tape somewhere.
Pardon the digression. I feel better now.
"never allow a white person to black up"
You have to hope that this was just a very badly handled attempt to let her down gently.
Was there really a policy that people could only sing songs by people of their own ethnicity? If so, that's pretty shocking.
EDIT: I don't mean I think that people on should black up/ white up, just that I can't see any good reason why they can't just sing the song they want, dress up and not really look much like the person like everyone else does. And is there a sliding scale where dark skinned white people are allowed to impersonate light skinned black people?
I got the impression
that he meant physically 'black up'. If she was supposed to be wanting to go on Stars In Her Eyes as Whitney, I think it might look slightly incongruous otherwise. You're supposed to actually look vaguely like the artist as well as far as I recall (though, in retrospect, how many really did?). I don't think there's at all a problem with letting 'white' people sing 'black' songs or vice versa.
But I suppose this was a problem with the show; an elephant in the room that no one mentioned.
I was paraphrasing
but only slightly. It's 16 years since I saw the rejection letter, but it definitely (on, I think, the third time of her resubmitting the same recording and photographs) mentioned not allowing cross-ethnicity where the contestants changed the colour of their skin. The previous rejections were the standard "we're sorry you have been unsuccessful" form letters you'd expect.
If you'd seen her publicity shots (she had to send one as herself, and one made-up to look like the artist), it might make more sense. She was even wearing an afro wig. The wig was the strangest part of all - Whitney Houston may have had an 80s perm at one point, but she was hardly noted for sporting an afro.
I would love to be able to say I'm making this up for comic effect, but it's all depressingly true. It generally comes up in conversation when I meet friends from those days for drinks.
Jesus Jones
Everyone's forgotten these, the lucky bastards. I hated everything about them, but particularly the way the singer used to go "ayyyaaayyyaaayyaaaaaayyy" on every bleeding song.
I've just remembered
that I've bought tickets to see them in November
David Essex - Rock On
Those preposterous stereo bass effects. Rock off, pal.
Sorry
but RO is a fantastic song, so different to everything else around at the time and still uniquely atmospheric, mainly due to the effect you disparage.
The going and out of the tunnel effect
on pop-dance records. During a particularly repetitious bit everything sounds like it's gone underwater and then, miracle of miracles! Re-emerges. This started to appear in the mid nineties and I was shocked to hear it still being used on three or four records in the top ten. Enough already.
Music Sounds Better With You
One of my favourite singles from the the end of the 90s uses that 'tunnel' filter to lovely effect I think. So there, nar-nar nar-nar nar!
And as for Rock On, great sounding record!
It's the fact that it's still being used.
It was alright in it's day.
I maintain that Rock On is awful but, like a lot of 70s crap, in an entertaining way.
I suspect that many annoying things...
... originate from one good use. Except auto tune. I have never heard a good use of that. And I like vocoders.
This was pretty good
Chuffing marvellous.
I love that song. When I was at uni, I bought a VERY good compilation with it on. The tracklist was:
Breeders – Cannonball
Chemical Brothers – Leave Home
Bomb The Bass – Beat Dis (Radio Edit)
Underworld – Rez
Sugarcubes – Birthday
Gomez – 78 Stone Wobble
Bran Van 3000 – Drinking In LA
Roy Vedas – Fragments Of Life
Badly Drawn Boy – It Came From The Ground
Elastica – Stutter
Harvey Danger – Flagpole Sitta
Mercury Rev – Goddess On A Hiway
Pulp – A Little Soul
Kristin Hersh – Your Ghost
Ooberman – Shorley Wall
Babybird – Bad Old Man
Johnny Cash – Ring Of Fire
Lambchop – The Man Who Loved Beer
Leftfield – Open Up
Fatboy Slim – Right Here, Right Now (Full Version)
Fun Lovin' Criminals – Fun Lovin' Criminals
Malcolm McLaren – Buffalo Gals
Prodigy – Poison ( EO)
Supergrass – Caught By The Fuzz
Placebo – You Don't Care About Us
Orbital – Quality Seconds
Manic Street Preachers – You Love Us
Kenickie – Come Out Nite
Sleater-Kinney – One More Hour
Adam And The Ants – Young Parisians
Sebadoh – Beauty Of The Ride
Drugstore – El President
Superstar – Superstar
Beth Orton – She Cries Your Name
Oasis – The Masterplan
Cocteau Twins – Iceblink Luck
Massive Attack – Safe From Harm
Nina Simone – Mr Bojangles
Pretty damn fine, in my opinion. The compiler? Jo Whiley. So she's not all bad.
Thats a great track listing Bob
Any idea what it was called?
Sure.
It was called "INCredible Sound Of Jo Whiley", and you can get it here for pennies.
Highly, highly recommended.
Crap 1980s Jazz Funk
Especially anything by Shakatak.
Bruce Springsteen
.
That twinkly bell effect used on 80s soul ballads a'la Whitney H
What are they called? A row of metal keys that dangle from a frame the percussionist runs a stick across.
Hateful!
It's called a Mark Tree
Flutes
Fine for Fauré, wrongity-wrong for rock 'n' roll.
What?
Even Dylan's Mr Tambourine Man from Live At Budokan?
Oh dear Archerylessons
Not even on King Crimson's I Talk To The Wind? Surely a classic blow job.
Surely you can't be serious Archie?
...will you not at least allow this masterpiece of the European rock canon?
Thijs fit
I can just about accept it when it's right up front like that, carrying the whole tune. What I've never been able to deal with is the multitude of occasions when the producer has obviously said, nodding sagely, "You know what'd work really well on this, lads? To really, you know, round it off? Some flute."
It's the ultimate non-rock-and-roll sound. Not because it's a classical instrument but because it's got no sex in it. You can have "dirty, grinding cellos"; you can even, at a push, get away with a "searing oboe"... but a "raunchy flute"? It just doesn't work, does it?
Any excuse to post this masterpiece
Fighting
talk!
David Byrne
of Talking Heads going 'Ay yi yi yi yi' on all those early records. So un-funky it's not true.
Wasn't that the point?
especially as Talking Heads could clearly be funky (cf Remain in Light, Fear of Music, Speaking in Tongues etc.)
808 State
and that bloody tweeting bird sounds.
STOPITSTOPITSTOPITSTOPITSTOPITSTOPITSTOPITSTOPITSTOPITSTOPITSTOPIT.
Nothing on this earth can excuse that.
Anything featuring
Sting.
Glottal stop
Anyone singing with a glottal stop should be barred from approaching a microphone for 3 months for a first offence and life thereafter.
Well that leaves us with
Noel Coward and no' a lo' else.
And Hampden...
... falls silent.
"Sco'land..."
"Shhhhhh."
"Sorry."
The worst glottal stop noise I ever heard
this is glottal stop hell. I have never been able to get past 30 seconds.
This is a band from Sydney. I used to work with one of them. He told me they'd released an EP, and said he'd bring one in for me. I said OK. Next day he handed it to and said "That's 10 dollars".
I was listening to a band the other night
who were quite good. The lead singer approached me later in the evening and asked me if I would play one of their home-recorded tracks on the radio. I said "sure". He gave me the CD. I had to give him $15.
Similar story
I gave the bloke who organises the music at my local pub a copy of my CD. In discussion I said I'd love a copy of his CD. After our gig he handed me his CD along with our fee, less a fiver for his CD.
Close miked breathy exhortations
beloved of Bono and him out of Snow Patrol..usually with each line punctuated by a breathy grunt as if they've just done several laps of Rockfield Studio grounds before 'laying down a vocal'.
A few to add
>80s Chorus effects on guitars. It sounded good in The Police and shite everywhere else (Check out almost every guitar on Live Aid). Extra points are deducted for using chorus on distorted guitars.
>Horn stabs (real or synth) at the end of every fucking line (see entire 80s pop cannon, esp. Phil Collins.
>The syncopated synth stabs that were on every dance song in the late 80s/early 90s
>The whining, constipated singing beloved of 80s hair metal bands (Bon Jovi being the prime example)
The 80s aren't coming out of this too great, are they?
Let's be frank...
...the 80s were a crock of s**t.
Oh, Colin.
Not like you to succumb to lazy kneejerks. The 80s were no worse than any other decade, or haven't you been watching TOTP 1976? Much of my favourite music ever was released in the 80s. It wasn't all Thatcher and Agadoo.
It's true IMHO
The 80s were dreadful.
Horrible synths, drums, haircuts, songs, everything.
Except for - Talking Heads, Elvis Costello, Steely Dan, and not much else.
Agree
Vile decade. The thing is, Bob's right, all decades have their crap. But in the 80s there was an explosion of digital equipment which was enthusiastically embraced and now sounds hideous, from the naff drum machines, tinny synthesisers to horrible sampling. Also record production went mad for BIG. Those awful thundering snare drums. Bob Clearmountain has a lot to answer for. I can think of a dozen albums from the 80s that would be brilliant if rerecorded without that signature horrible sound.
You've absolutely nailed the root of the problem, Twang...
...although I must say it's kind of Bob (above) to say that I may not usually be a tar-em-all brush merchant!
I actually did like some 80s music, including the Human League and John Foxx for example, but it was generally all made in the first third of the decade. There did come a point, alas, when all those horrible noises Twang refers to became the norm.
It wasn't that the music was necessarily bad (though there was a huge amount that just didn't appeal to me), it was that the SOUND of the records made it awful and juvenile and unlistenable.
Even in the prog/classic rock world a lot of acts struggled with trying to adapt their sound in the 80s - and then by the mid 90s had all somehow re-found their 'classic' sound again and we all breathed a huge sigh of relief.
Can there be anything as unloved as an 80s sounding album by Wishbone Ash, for example?
I agree with Bob
I think the 80s get an unfairly rough ride. I turned 13 in 1981 and a lot of my favourite music comes from that decade
Yeah, and I think the "sound" argument is really limited.
The idea that everyone was using gated drums and overproducing everything to within an inch of its life is just, well, wrong. (And Colin, a Wishbone Ash record from *any* decade is worth avoiding, for my money!)
Just from the critical cachet section of the 80s:
The Smiths
An R.E.M. album almost every year from 1982 onwards.
Cocteau Twins
Guns N' Roses
Pixies
Throwing Muses
Dead Can Dance
Michael Jackson
Sonic Youth
The Blue Nile
Human League
So much early hip-hop from LL Cool J to Steinski
The most fertile period in the history of metal
I could go on and on and on, but won't.
For pretty much every shite Agadoo thing or bad Duran Duran single, you can pull out some seriously great and influential music. And chart pop, actually, threw up some amazingly good stuff whose quality is reflected in its long-standing popularity.
From Bob's list
I concur with The Smiths and would humbly add Felt and the Farmer's Boys.
Er, can't remember much else that I liked from that decade though.
I'm with you, Bob, on...
...the League and the Cocteaus and the Smiths (plus one or two others like Husker Du and the Icicle Works), but I'm afraid I'd avoid the rest like the plague.
We'll just have to agree to disagree, I fear.
And YTDS - I also turned 13 in 1981. The rest of the decade was cultural purgatory - one's prime years of enthusiasm, blunted by a landscape/soundscape full of crap. I shudder at the thought of it even now. I'd have been lost without second hand record shops (there still were such things) and music encyclopedias of past eras.
Well sure...
...but even if you don't like many of those bands, you have to admit that Twango's "eighties sound" point doesn't apply to any of them. The standard critique of "80s music" is that it all sounds the same and is summed up in a few Kajagoogoo and Spandau Ballet singles. When in fact it was as diverse and interesting as any other decade.
Of course there'll be exceptions in any era...
...but I would try and paraphrase it this way: in the 70s most kinds of popular music had an 'organic' feel to their construction and recording; in the 80s most popular music had a 'synthetic' feel.
After the 80s a lot of acts have tried in some part at least to get back to that organic feel (albeit still harnessing the technological advances in recording to smooth out the rough edges).
I can't put it any simpler than that. There's just something about the music making aesthetic in the 80s that left me cold.
Hmm.
I don't think that's any truer than saying "music in the 70s was overlong and self-indulgent", personally. Some was. Some 80s music feels clinical/"synthetic". I think it's a mistake to imagine there was a unifying aesthetic to *any* decade. It's not about exceptions to a rule, for me: it's that the rule isn't there in the first place, except perhaps in a few big-selling records.
Anyway, let's agree to disagree. I'm just really wary of trying to act like decades have a unifying feel or characteristic. They're just arbitrary divisions of time, they don't mean anything.
Agree to disagree
There'll always be exceptions. But if someone said "classic 80s sound" you'd know what they meant, wouldn't you!
BTW the man who is tired of "Argus" is tired of life.
Nail: :Head
Although I agree with a lot of what Bob says, and that there was a lot of good music made in the 80s, I absolutely concur with Twang that most of us, unless we were being disingenuous, would know pretty precisely what "classic 80s sound" meant - as it happens, I don't object to that sound as categorically as Twang does. Indeed, one of my favourite albums ever (um, as I may have mentioned before) is Welcome Home by 'Til Tuesday, whose sound I will happily describe as "none more 80s": huge crashing drum sounds, guitars echoed to infinity, great washes of synths.
And yet, for me it comes down to the songs: they're bloody great songs, with chord structures and tunes that are robust enough to wear those opulent trappings, which sound so preposterous on so much material of that era. Here, for your delectation, is the opening song, What About Love. Turn the volume up and marvel at this pop brilliance, raise your eyebrow approvingly at Aimee Mann's delicious bass lines, gape at her beauty, and guffaw at her hilariously terrible dancing.
Seriously, what's not to like??
In a nutshell
The production. I hate that thin synth string pad shite they splatter all over everything. But otherwise I like the song and she is cute. But it's back to my point - I wish some of these otherwise perfectly nice records cold be decontaminated. The bass part is typically 80s too isn't it - synth bass, of course. Again, nice part, hate the sound.
Here's another example. SAW of course. But great song and vocal. Vile production.
PS don't tell anyone - I've got the vinyl album with this on it...
Synth bass?
Are you sure?? I know that Aimee Mann is a very nifty bass player, as I've seen and heard her play bass; obviously that doesn't ipso facto mean it's her playing on the record - BUT she's certainly credited as playing bass on the album, and it doesn't sound like a synth bass to me.
You could be right
Just sounds a bit sequenced to me. But it's a good part, whatever.
I just had to
reply to this comment to see how skinny a post could get.
I agree that production was the root of many 80s sonic disasters. Ignoring the syn-drums/synth accusations, many otherwise great records made in the 80s sound terrible. Listen to Flip Your Wig and New Day Rising by Husker Du. Great albums, great songs but woeful production and sound: flappy drum sounds, cheap digital reverb over everything and a murky mix. At least the crap in the 60s and 70s was immaculately produced. I think that cheap recording technology in the 80s negated a lot of the craft that went into producing a good-sounding record.
The BMI of this post
would look good
on another
thread
about
fat
Welcome Home
Some of it has dated in terms of arrangement, but generally 'Welcome Home' is a wonderful album. 'Lover's Day' is a perfect specimen as is 'Will She Just Fall Down' and the title track.
Rhett Davis was accused of being a bit over the top with his production. Some of the criticism was aimed at 'Everything's Different Now', with one 'inky' (I think it was NME) reviewer going on about 'less is more', but the songs are so strong that I don't care - especially the first four songs on side 1. I think Richard Williams was quoted as saying that if the album ended after 'J for Jules' it would be a near perfect pop album.
Okay Bob, let me try and put it another way...
...I think I can say with some certainty - because it only applies to me, not struggling toward an objective way of bracketing a whole era together (which is where our difficulties have come in) - that I lived through the 80s, in my teens and early 20s, and really, strenuously disliked the vast majority of music (and clothing) of that time.
I just didn't like it. I didn't like big shoulders, high-waisted jeans with tapered legs, shirts buttoned up with no ties, jackets worn 'Miami Vice' style, sawn-off women's trousers, oversized women's T shirts hung off one shoulder, shell suits, anything 'baggy'... I didn't like the production sound of SAW, of Trevor Horn, of the people who did all that Def Leppard-type stuff... I didn't like syn drums, tinny keyboards, saxophone solos, Luther Vandross-alike modern R&B ... I didn't even much like any of the records made in the 80s by the people I liked who made 60s/70s records which I was then discovering by second hand copies!
Look - I don't mean anyone any offence but it's as simple as this: I just didn't like the '80s and I'm glad that time has gone.
If a new group of good looking lads
all playing their own instruments, writing their own songs - came out of the London club scene with tracks like Insinction, Musclebound and The Freeze now they'd be lauded to high heaven. Those records weirdly sound kind of modern now.
Got nothing good to say about Kaja though!
But other great 80s stuff:
Human League
Dexy's
XTC
Japan
Hall & Oates
Tom Petty
Fleetwood Mac
Soft Cell
Funboy Three
Style Council
Adam And The Ants
The Cure
Big Country
The Bunnymen
Prince
Stone Roses
happy mondays
Sisters Of Mercy
Cowboy Junkies
Tom Waits
Scritti Politti
Hanoi Rocks
I bought records by all these acts at the time and still love them now. Hardly any of them got Phil C in to produce mind...
I would like to add
Red Guitars
Gary Numan
Living Colour
Marrs
The The
The Cult
Public Image Ltd
The Sugarcubes
Altered Images
Billy Bragg
The Pogues
The Specials
Madness
Siouxsie And The Banshees
The Bolshoi
The Wonder Stuff
James
Run DMC
Classic 80s sound?
Oh dear...
...again, no offence meant YT, but with the possible exception of Madness, Gazza Numan up to about 1981 and the Cult if I'm feeling generous, that list is just abhorrent to me.
Sorry...
No offence taken
Let's be honest, I'm sure we could do this for every decade from the 50s onwards.
Indeed we could!
...but these text boxes would have become impossibly narrow by the end of it! :-D
Idea for next Mingle CDs
"Best of a certain decade". Could be tied to a particular decade (eg 80s); or could be up to the Compiler. But it'd be interesting to see what folk come out with.
Just a thought.
Decade-defining sounds..
Brace yourself, kids, for here are the very worst of the mid-80's and all in one handy package. You can date this almost exactly to late 1985 by the sound alone. After this, I think the industry shook itself by the scruff of the neck and calmed down a bit.
So. Gated drums? Yep. Massive "smooth" overproduction? Yep. Horn stabs a-plenty? Check. Loads of DX-7? Oh yes. Guitar solo featuring scooped, compressed Super Strat sound, lots of Floyd Rose work and some finger-tapping for good measure? Very much so.
Ladies and gentlemen, I give you Mr George Benson with No One Emotion.
You know for the next mingle...
... acceptable in the 80's is a great idea.
No one has brought up eighties hip hop yet, but Public Enemy, 3rd Bass, EPMD, Ultramagnetic MC's, Run DMC. Some brilliant stuff was happening in hip hop, in fact it might have even been the actual golden age.
Quite by accident
I got into hip hop in 86-87. The Next 3-4 years were the most creative and exciting period in this genre, comparable to the mid-60s in rock. There was also some real bilge, of course.
I quite
like that, if only as a period piece.
What about Wood Beez by Scritti Politti? It has all of the offending ingredients yet still sounds superb in my opinion.
Fair point
Nit picking slightly, the bands I really like out of that list are all 70s bands - Tom Petty, Japan, Fleetwood Mac, Tom Waits, Hall and Oates. But the wider point is a good one. I've been quite voluble about not liking 80s bands and the classic 80s production tropes, but it would be too harsh to say it was all crap. I bought loads of music inthe 80s and still like the majority of it. None of it was of the post-punk / synthpop / SAW oeuvres, but there was plenty of other good stuff, so in that i stand corrected. Actually The Smiths records SOUND great to this day. I find I can't listen to them for long mainly due to not buying the whole Morrisey shtick, and I find his melodies repetitive and dreary. But the band is and sounds great, and I have a lot of time for Johnny Marr. So bring on the 80s! I shall look forward to doing a compilation of 80s music for people who don't like 80s music.
I imagine you're older than me.
I was a teenager mid 80s and I was blown away by The Smiths - Morrissey was pretty much your perfect teenage angst spokesman. He's like an embarrassing relative now though and his post-Smiths music lacks the poise and grace the band had.
You're right about those 70s/80s bands, hadn't noticed that apart from Tom Waits who I included as Raindogs and the like were staples in the student halls. Did he reach a sales peak in the 80s? I imagine this to be the case.
Tom Petty and Fleetwood Mac did of course release their career highlights in the 70s but Tango In The Night is hard to argue with and as for Tom Petty - well Is suppose he had his big hits in the 80s and somehow managed to let Dave Stewart produce him and it not turn out dreadful.
Japan - their most famous sonic incarnation is the 80s one. They were pretty cool to my young eyes. Don't think their sound has dated really.
Hall & Oates I must confess to really hating at the time. Now I love them, but I'm only just getting familiar with their story. They were the best act on at Live Aid though contrary to popular opinion.
Lastly, it seems strange that the Dame messed up the second half of the 80s. He had the first five years sewn up!
He did say though
That we've only got five years, all things being equal.
Cap
doffed.
I heard this on the radio today
and it contains every single sin of 80s music. It's little more than a string of production gimmicks welded together. (John Farnham: Pressure Down)
Death by a thousand buts
The way that Cliff sings the word "but" at 1.09 makes me want to set fire to a choir boy:
https://
Woo that's...remarkable
It reminded me instantly of the first syllable of "Babcock", as pronounced by Rowan Atkinson's headmaster in The Secret Policeman's Ball.
Jesus,
I've been trying to avoid the Labour Party Conference all week. And you have to stick Ed Milliband up.
Except it's a bit funny for Ed, isn't it?
Oh wa oh
As in the beginning of Video Killed the Radio Star. So affected. Often used by people who have run out of lyrics.
The Apple-dad-falsetto-shit-gargle
is the name I have for what takes places in this song between 0.33 and 0.36 seconds.
You know those all those potty-mouthed words for vagina? This man is all of them at the same time..
Truly awful.
Hate the way he pronounces 'ya' - as in 'When ya feel...'
That's the way Tony Blair used to pronounce it. Oh so matey. Oh so first year at uni.
Fretless bass
I've been mulling it over and I think fretless bass, especially if it's been run through a chorus effect, is the sound of vomit. No it's the sound of the taste of somebody elses vomit in your own mouth after discovering that somebody has been sick in your pint and you've just drunk it.
I really don't like that sound.
And, of course, you can't dust for vomit.
.
I know she's very well thought of
but I've always found Cait O'Riordan's fretless bass on the Pogues' "Waltzing Matilda" intrusive and wrong.
No, no, Simon...
...it's MUCH worse than that.
Look
Eighies haterz. There's nothing wrong with them. They're of their time. We don't talk about how we think the la-la-la-la-la-la-las in Hey Jude get on our wick (there's way too many of them) or how any amount of post punk oo-ee-oos from the Seventies are just plain silly, do we?
Leave the Eighties alone. They're an easy target. You'll come to appreciate them in time.
Here here
I loved the 80's you could publicly listen to The Smiths, The Cure and The Bunnymen and go home and put on your Haircut 100 album. Radio 1 was great, Top of the Pops was unmissable and no-one really took it all to seriously. There was real invention and originality and ok for every Sal Solo there was a Peter Cetera but find me an era when that wasn't the case? From Claire Grogan to Mel and Kim from Spandau to Bros and even Level 42 made some fun, happy great sounding pop tunes and I will defend them to my last breath. i like music that makes me introspective and sad and melancholy but I also love a tune that makes me grin like a fool and dance like a loon. If you don't well I'm sorry, I feel your life is a little bit emptier but that's your choice and I for one won't force it on you but don't tell me the 80's were shite, I'm just not having it.
"I feel your life is a little bit emptier "
....hmmmm, thanks Dave - I've been wondering what the problem was these past 30 years: if ONLY I could learn to love 80s records it would all be grand and lovely!
Actually, Jethro Tull were my biggest musical interest in the early 80s - discovered through the magical Living In The Past 2LP, then Aqualung and then - at last, a current release! - Broadsword in 1982. It felt like a long wait till 1985's 'Under Wraps' album, and it came as quite a shock: all drum machines and synthy stabs and so on. This track, 'Lap Of Luxury', was the single. Funny thing is though that from a distance Under Wraps sounds a lot better than it did at the time, plus the B sides of the Lap Of Luxury single double pack were terrific (especially 'Down At The End Of Your Road'). And @Later That Same Evening' remains one of Ian's best overlooked gems in my view. In hindsight, he was making a pretty good effort at moving with the times. But - whatever you say Dave - I'm still glad that those times are now but a largely unlamented memory...
No offence meant Colin
I'm sure your life is full. It's just that for me the ability to put on "Pelican West", "Dare", "Lexicon of Love" or "Penthouse and Pavement" is a joy I couldn't live without. The 80's were my era, decadent, boozy, fun and girls, every 80's tune fixes me in a time and place when times were good, I had no responsibilities, lot's of mates and a beer to hand. Shallow maybe but that is what the 80's were to me. There was real invention, clever use of the technology available and tune after tune that made me think "I haven't heard that before". I bow to your knowledge of English Folk and Prog, it is a pleasure to engage with a proper journalist with your wealth of knowledge and I wish I had the time and energy yo listen to some of the stuff you recommend and I'm sure it is as special to you as some fluffy 80's pap is to me. I did a track from "Dark Side of the Moon" on the radio the other day there was a girls kind of singing/screaming all the way through, it was lovely and instantly put me in mind of "Tears For Fears" so maybe the 80's might have something for you.
Tears For Fears "Woman In Chains"
"decadent, boozy, fun and girls"
I think you've nailed my problem there, Dave. I experienced none of those things in the 80s. Maybe that's where your path in life is forged? If you don't or can't have fun you turn inwards?
Whatever my knowledge is or was, I bow before you Dave: you had fun while I was too busy thinking about why life wasn't. You live and learn, I suppose.
Ah Colin
it's only about a bit of music. There's no right or wrong here and no need for any bowing. Trust me my life since the 80's, children not included, has been less than perfect and maybe that's why I cling to a few songs and silly haircuts, there's a reason why Del Amitris sadness and melancholy struck such a chord in the 90's and beyond. You keep progging and keep posting, the old blog is a richer place because of you.
Middle ground...
...there has to be some middle ground! I bought this at the time - a nice piece of pop melancholia. Still sounds good (despite 80s production), though looking at the 80s fashion in the vid doesn't exactly help)...
Nick Heyward
another who suffers from terminal 80's association. Pelican West was a fantastic piece of proper jazz funk mixed with pop that really stands the test of time. As with Roland Orzabal, Billy MacKenzie and others I will concede that the 80's did them no favours, they tried to fit and ended up falling between to stools. I feel I owe you a listen of some Tull or The M Orchestra for more of that middle ground.
Hey - I've just remembered...
...that, in spectacular contrast to my 80s-hating ethos, there was a period in 1998-99 when I managed a comeback version of The Adventures - Belfast's none-more-80s popsters, who'd enjoyed 1989's most-plays-on-Radio-1 song 'Broken Land (though it was only a modest hit) and toured with Fleetwood Mac etc...
Pat Gribben, their guitarist/writer, seemed to think I could bring something to the table and he was right, up to a point - better PR, better gig fees, some kind of strategy. But ultimately I didn't feel I had the ruthlessness to be a manager and, besides, I had a book commission to get on with.
It was funny, at times, though: I recall having several conversations with Pat and Terry Sharpe (the singer) about how much I disliked the sound of '80s records, and how it was a shame theirs fell into that category. After a few such chats Terry said, 'Look, Colin, it's like this: we were a band in the '80s, making records in the 80s and those records are going to sound like an 80s band that made records in the 80s!'
Put like that, there was no arguing about it! Having said all that, Pat and Terry also operated a covers band, The Dead Handsomes, in Belfast in the late 90s and anytime I was in the audience Terry would announce, 'Ladies and gentlemen, we're going to play some progressive rock now - Hocus Pocus by Focus...' and a blistering version would ensue, to my delight and probably everyone else's bafflement. Their drummer - a chap who'd been in some version of Stiff Little Fingers - used to hate it: apparently Hocus Pocus is a bugger to drum on. Not much good for the punk-rock cred, either...
Anyway, I still believe Terry Sharpe is a fabulous singer and Pat's a great writer and seriously good guitar player. His pop-song style hides a wealth of influences - he's a Mahavishnu Orchestra fan, yet can somehow write a George Best stage musical and album tracks for Pop Idol people. Nothing if not adaptable.
The Adventures still periodically get together for odd gigs, usually in Belfast. I don't know exactly when/where this TV appearance is from but I believe it's from the last 3-4 years. And yes, it's their hit, 'Broken Land':
I think you've just trumped
my decadence, fun, booze and girls. I remember "Broken Land" with great affection and you just drop in that you managed The Adventures for a while. I think it's time you put your 80's experience into words from a 70's perspective "Proggers Plays Pop", you can have that title on me ;o)
"Proggers Plays Pop"
...brilliant! :-D
But, crikey, Dave - offering to listen to the Mahavishnu Orchestra as 'middle ground' - I couldn't possibly hold you to that!
I agree about Nick Heyward, though - I always thought he was a little bit of a man in the wrong time. I'm sure he's underrated, and I suspect the 80s association is perhaps more minus than plus for him. I don't know, though - what's he up to these days? Is he still involved in making music? Is he playing pubs somewhere managed by some square-peg/round-hole merchant like me, hoping he'll throw in a cover of something by Focus every so often...?
Nick Heyward
is now doing the "80's" circuit back with Haircut 100, I must get to see them, their version of "Living In The Past" is a joy I'm told. Anyway back to the middle ground bit, I own Tubular Bells which I assume can be considered prog, I never managed beyond side one but I love it none the less. On my Tears For Fears kick I am reminded of "Listen" from "Songs From the Big Chair" I suggest Mr Orzabal also owned a copy of Mike Oldfields masterpiece. "Poppers Play Prog"
Tears For Fears "Listen"
Synthesised Shakuhachi
The synthesised version of the Japanese shakuhachi that was everywhere for about 18 months in the mid 1980s.
There's a partial list of its appearances at the end of this Wikipedia article:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Shakuhachi
Ah, I think I know the answer to this one
On the Neil Young & Crazy Horse Live in Stockholm 7 March 2001 bootleg CD, after 2.15 of the song Only Love Can Break Your Heart some twerp in the crowd shouts "Rock n'Roll, woohoo".
Was it...
Hjømer Simpssen?
Well
I suppose a Danish guy could have been in Stockholm, yes...
His Swedish cousin Hjömer Simpsson might have been there too. :-)
Aaaah-woooooh
I like the record; the weedy wolf impression less so.
Live recordings
where the crowd claps in time (which is bad enough) and then lose it. If you can't keep time don't clap. So don't bloody clap.
two immediately spring to mind
1. Kevin Rowland in twat-in-overalls period
2. Alison Moyet, not so much for vocal affectation but for showing off eg the totally unnecessary vocal cascading (not sure of the musical term) on Is This Love
Although
the "twat-in-overalls period" produced one of the great albums of any era.
No.
That's just not true.
Anyway they were (ahem) dungarees.
Sorry if you've just eaten.
In your opinion.
I have a different one.
It's Thursday, it's Top of the Pops,,,
And here are Simply Red.
The 80s debate
That seems to be on many different threads seems to me a bit daft.
A decade is an entirely arbitrary categorization of music. Like saying, "On the whole, I can't stand music that was recorded on Wednesday afternoons".
Really?
You don't think the concept of a decade as a way of discussing culture is useful? Eg "the 60s" etc? How else are you going to do it?
By genre, by artist, by style...
... my point is , that when people say "I love/hate '80s music" I want to ask, what do you mean, "Nixon in China" or "Agadoo"?
Surely
following your own argument, you wouldn't/couldn't generalise a particular style of music as '60s music'? The same principle applies to the 80s or indeed any other decade; obviously you can discuss and debate the diverse styles of music prominent within the given decade in a wider cultural context, but one musical trend is never going to define the whole period in the way you're suggesting.
I liked the Eighties
I spent ten years there.
I've always been perfectly delighted with music recorded on...
...Thursday Afternoons. But Wednesdays...? Hmmmmmm.... you ask penetrating and pithy questions, Moosemeister...
That's spooky, Colin
I chose this piece this very week for a Facebook group I'm involved with, 'The 7 Days of...', where participants take turns to choose one song per day on their chosen theme for their nominated week. Most of the group have hitherto gone for individual artists, but my theme was Days of the Week, hence...
It must be great minds thinking alike, Typo...
...did someone go for Wednesday Night Prayer Meeting by Charles Mingus? Or was it Wednesday Week by the Undertones? Blue Monday? Tuesday Afternoon (Moody Blues)? Friday On My Mind? Saturday Night's Alright For Fighting? Sunday Morning (Velvets)?
How did I do? :-D
Thursday Afternoon - a mesmerising piece. It kept me sane for many months over 2009/10 when my job was very isolated and filled with downtime. Helped the time pass less painfully, did Mr Eno.
Hi Colin
I probably didn't explain it well...each person chooses the theme and the songs for the whole week, then it goes on to another group member's choices for their week, etc.
You got one right; my choices were
Carpenters - Rainy Days And Mondays
Cowboy Junkies - Sun Comes Up, It's Tuesday Morning
Undertones - Wednesday Week (yay!)
Brian Eno - Thursday Afternoon
The Cure - Friday I'm In Love
The Blue Nile - Saturday Night
Morrissey - Every Day Is Like Sunday
An entertaining diversion (or another good timewasting exercise!)
Ah! understood...
...you certainly avoided those obvious ones! Mind you, the Undertones - strictly speaking were'nt they talking about NEXT wednesday. Any pedants among your Facebook crowd chip in there...? :-D
By the way, I annoyingly left my disc of Thursday Afternoon at my last place of work. (Well, someone actually 'borrowed' the CD player from my room with that disc still in it and I couldn't find the player before I left) I have the CD case, though. Don't suppose, if you're feeling generous, you might slip me a CDR copy in the post...?
I don't know anyone else who has a copy!
Hi Colin
I don't have a copy as yet (working on it!). I just found that clip, and the full hour-long one, on Youtube.
If you're talking about the audio CD of TA
(rather than the accompanying VHS) then I have a copy.
PM me :-)
I am...
...and I will!
Pick up your stones
and prepare to throw them at me, for I hate Al Kooper's cheesy organ sound on Like a Rolling Stone. I hate all Hammond Organ noise that sounds like that.
ignore
this
and fake scratches on vinyl
from a CD
and cheezoid Hammond organ
as made by Al Kooper that goes "cheez cheezy cheez cheeze".
It upsets me man, please understand this Jim. It's not some irrational flight.
Coming in a little late on this but...
...one of my current bugbears is the politically correct "tihs" sounds which are inserted into pop starlets' little songs on the radio. That is, where the singist sings a naughty word and the record company just cuts it out and reverses it to avoid losing radio play. Yes, Joss Stone, I'm looking at you!
Running a close second is the whole rappy "leaving the sweary words out altogether" poly which results in a totally Swiss cheese'd and even more incomprehensible lyric.
Now, it's a personal preference that I'm not one for the old casual profanity. However, if that is someone else's thing, fine... no problem. Just front up, be a man and accept that if you want to sing potty mouth it's not going to get played on mainstream daytime radio. Frankly, Messrs Fagen and Becker seem to have lived quite happily for 30 odd years with the idea that Show Biz Kids won't get radio play (though there was that one Danny Baker show on Radio 1...).
Or, if you're so worried that this will dent your record sales then actually take the bother to re-record it without the naughty words added. Fair play to, for instance, the Beautiful South and Cee Lo for recording a separate clean radio version - however awkward and shoehorned in those alternate lyrics sounded. 10 out of 10 for trying!
However, the glaring, artificial backwards word (we all KNOW what it is really!) is just really, really grating on the ear. Grr! Just stop it!
The Indicipherable Boys
AKA Mark and lard parodied this extremely well;
tihs
illustrates perfectly that "gosh how sensitive" way of pronouncing the first "s" of a word so beloved of Al Stewart and Nick Drake to name but two. Took me ages to get into Nick Drake because of that, Stewart was a lost cause from day one.
Brett Anderson
of whose oeuvre I'm generally a fan, has a terrible habit of going very hard on his "s"s, at least in his 21st century records. See The Tears' "Refugeesss".
That said, the new album is highly recommended.
Yes!
I noticed that when I got the recent reissues - once you clock it, it's hard to ignore
More cowbells
Some most-annoying sounds that haven't been mentioned yet (I think)
The annoying interludes and skits between songs. Usually found on rap records but also the 'party' bits between tracks on Janet Jackson's Rhythm Nation (think it was that one anyway)
Anything by Kenny G
BTW I'm actually down on cowbells in moderation, just surprised nobody mentioned them yet.
Schoolly D's
early records were plastered with terrible drum-machine cowbells and bongos, placed really high in the mix. Very much a distraction from the pentrating intellect on display in his lyrics.
Roger that on "comedy" bits on hip hop LPs. I've just edited my "De La Soul is Dead" on iTunes down to the ten or eleven tracks on it that are actually pieces of music - the resulting 40 minute album is about 400 times better.
The Sqauwking
of Axl Rose.
ps: He's the reincarnation of Ethel Merman, you know.
Mr Punch does rawk...
Say no more!
Hiss
I hated hiss; i don't miss it
Hear hear
And records that jump. I'm as fond of vinyl as the next chap, but jumps on records were like a spike being driven into my soul.
That stupid gunshot at the end of Elizabeth My Dear
what's that supposed to be?
Isn't it a
gunshot through a silencer?
I know this from years of playing Goldeneye on the N64 when I should have been going to lectures
Heretical, but Bob Marley
did that funny yodelling thing a lot on his Island records. I hate it.
Bjork.
Love her speaking.
Hate those other noises she makes.
I've got it! The DEFINITIVE most irritating noise in music
is that of an old group saying "We're going to reform".
[pissed off about the Roses...]
Nup
the most irritating is the one that goes "This is the best album we've ever made" before it is released.
cf. Metallica's St. Anger
I think Brett Anderson might have said that
when "New Morning" came out.
How do these people sleep?
Although, to be fair...
Having lived and breathed an album for 6 months and sweated blood to get it finished, few bands would say "It's OK but it's not a patch on our debut from 10 years ago"
Well, I did quite like the La's approach -
"Our new album is shite, don't buy it".
Which was honest, if wrong.